Thomas Kinkade’s Christmas Cottage: Have Yourself A Depressed Christmas

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A young man, played by Jared Padalecki, must do all he can to save his families cottage.

So in terms of Christmas films, both good and bad, this is deeply average. Whilst the film certainly is watchable, there is much worse, it is far too cliched to ever be good. The film feels like the most overly sentimental ever produced, to add to that the plot leaves nothing to the imagination and progress exactly as you would expect it to.

The ending, which is again obvious, especially if you have ever watched one of these sort of films before, feels both unbelievable but also incredibly Deus Ex Machina. If this wasn’t based on real life I would say it is far too convenient writing used to tie things up nicely.

Padalecki is fine as is the rest of the cast, but this film is by no means going to win any awards for its acting. Padalecki seemed to find it hard to change facial emotion for the entirety of the films runtime which is always a sign of either someone who doesn’t care and want to be there or someone who can’t act, I’ll let you decide which.

Overall, far too overly sentimental and cliched to pass average.

Pros.

It is watchable.

Chris Elliot

Cons.

It is cliched

It is overly sentimental

The ending is both blindingly obvious but also incredibly unrealistic

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The Menu: A Memorable Dining Experience

4.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

An exclusive dining experience goes badly wrong.

I thought this film was genuinely great on a number of levels. Most notably for me was the biting social commentary which had me both appalled at what Ralph Fiennes’ evil chef character was saying but also in some senses agreeing with him. I liked that this film had a very clear socio-economic/political message to it and wasn’t afraid to tackle it openly, moreover, rather than force its message down your throat to the point of choking you it approached it with a surprising amount of nuance which I really appreciated.

Additionally, this film is aided by being incredibly funny. This film had me laughing out loud quite often, its sense of humour is often jet black but it really worked for me. Whether it was the name cards for various different dishes or the way Nicholas Hoult’s Taylor was so mercilessly taken down the film was a laugh riot.

I think the film did its best to see to its supporting cast and give everyone a moment to shine, bar Arturo Castro who is terribly wasted, but really this film is about the interplay between Anya Taylor-Joy’s Margo and Fiennes Slowik and there is where the film really comes alive. Both actors are on top form, it goes without saying, but Taylor-Joy really shines and her scream queen credentials get yet another notch.

My only slight issue with the film was that the ending was rather predictable, not just that but also overly familiar. That is not to say that the ending didn’t work for the film, but rather than it was incredibly obvious where it was heading. I would have preferred something either more subversive or more shocking.

Overall, one of the best films of the year for sure.

Pros.

Fiennes

Taylor-Joy

Hoult

The humour

The social commentary

Cons.

The ending was a little weak

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Tar: The Darkside Of Genius

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A venerated conductor, played by Cate Blanchett, has her life upturned when someone from her past commits suicide after accusing her on improper behaviour.

The trailers for this film made it look far more cerebral than it actually was, it looked far more liked a stylised concept whereas what this film actually turns out to be is fairly conventional in most regards.

I enjoyed that this film felt like a direct response to #metoo and cancel culture and asked questions that aren’t often thought about such as what happens after the accusations are made, how do these people continue on, how do they live with themselves for what they have done, what is the power of an accusation? Though the plot has been roughly done before, I thought that this film did bring some nuance to the conversation and reframe things.

As always Blanchett was terrific and completely chameleon esque, she sank fully into the role to such a point where you question whether this is a fiction film or a documentary and question the boundary between art and reality. Though I suppose that was the point.

My main issue with this film was that the runtime was far too long. Not only does this make the film feel far more inaccessible as it leads to pacing issues but it also feels incredibly self-indulgent, there could have been a fairly solid two hour film here, but they get far too cocky and decide to try and stretch it out, this leads to problems.

Overall, an interesting concept coupled with a great performance from Blanchett are met with an off putting runtime that leads to large pacing issues.

Pros.

Blanchett

The film’s take on #MeToo

The style

Cons.

The runtime

It feels a little too smug at times

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Enola Holmes 2: Back By Algorithm Demand

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Enola Holmes, played by Millie Bobby Brown, is back for an all new tedious mystery that you will immediately forget about the second the film ends.

So I will say that this film is watchable, and does have a few good moments. I liked the furthering of the romance between Enola and Lord Tewkesbury, played by Louis Partridge, and thought that it was very sweet and I also liked that Enola is now out on her own and is not still at the beck and call of her brothers.

However, I would say that is where the positives for this film end. Mainly my problem with this sequel is that it is totally unneeded, the mystery is far more dull than the first, you don’t care about it and it all just feels like Netflix were screaming for more of the same. Indeed most of the aspects that worked well in the first film, such as the fourth wall breaking, are turned up to the max here and in almost every case they are pushed too far and to a point wherein they become annoying.

Moreover, though Henry Cavill was a strong part of the first film, here he feels pretty aimless. Maybe that is the point, but they force in Moriarty Holmes’ famous nemesis to try and give him something to do and even that ends up boring. In many sense I feel like this film was forced into production before they had a good idea as to what they wanted the sequel to be and so a lot of it comes off as generic.

Finally, a lot of the commentary and messaging of this film is not as insightful or as fresh as it thinks it is, and instead ends up bring out the same old same old feminist lectures that have been done better before. It comes off as try hard and wannbe, if they are going to give the film a message lets at least have it be timely and fresh.

Overall, a fairly needless sequel.

Pros.

Enola is finally her own boss

It is watchable

A few entertaining moments

Cons.

It doesn’t justify its existence

The commentary is tame and tepid

It can’t find an interesting story to tell

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Guess Who’s Coming To Christmas: A PureFlix Cast Off

1/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A hard rocking singer, played by Drew Lachey, decides that what he actually needs to have a good Christmas is small town values and the love of Christ.

Is this a faith film? Was this in the PureFlix Christmas selection? Honestly, I have nothing against faith films but this was awful and had a terrible message. The daughter, played by MacKenzie Porter, doesn’t seem to have a will of her own in this film- it is either what the father wants for her or what the leading man wants. The two seem to treat the female lead as though she is a bag of rice to be controlled and bartered over and it’s quite off-putting. However, it does get worse as the wider faith elements that permeate almost all areas of this film just turn it into religious propaganda.

Lachey’s lead isn’t particularly likeable either as he goes from a sleaze to a patriarchal oppressor and that is supposed to be a good change for his character if you can believe it.

Honestly this film just feels like a PureFlix cast off.

Overall, a bad film with a message that becomes more and more off-putting the more you sit and think about it.

Pros.

It is short

Cons.

It feels like a PureFlix cast off

The message is awful

The lead isn’t likeable

The ending sours the whole film

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Christmas With You: A Sleazey Christmas Message

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A famous singer, played by Andi Garcia, decides to spend Christmas with a fan, played by Deja Monique Cruz, whose TikTok video she likes, and whilst she is there she also decides to hook up with the fan’s dad, played by Freddie Prinze Jr.

Honestly, I just thought this was fairly boring, it wasn’t so bad it was good nor was it redeemable or even enjoyable in any way. As I approached the two thirds mark I was checking to see how long was left which highlights how much of a slog this film is to get through, it is really just aggressively average.

The worst thing about this film is just how little chemistry the two leads have, there is a moment in the final few minutes of the film where they have their big first kiss of the film and it couldn’t be more cold if they were trying for it.

Moreover, there is inherently something a bit icky about a star coming to spent time with her teen fan and then hooking up with her dad and becoming her new stepmother. I don’t know it struck a weird and not wanted chord with me.

Overall, a deeply meh Christmas film that you can easily give a miss.

Pros.

It is watchable

It does have some unintentional humour

It is nice to see Freddie Prinze Jr back on screens again

Cons.

It is boring and a slog to watch

The premise is a bit icky

The leads have no chemistry at all

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50/50: Laughter In The Face Of Tough Questions

4.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Adam Lerner, played by Joseph Gordan Levitt, finds out he has cancer and that his odds aren’t good.

I thought this film was one of the most genuine and touching that I have watched in a while. It made me cry at several points as I think the beauty of the film really is quite powerful to behold, not only does the film deal with heavy themes but it does so through a lens of optimism and to a degree happiness. I found this to be a really lovely film in many ways.

In terms of performances Levitt proves once again just how great he is here, his character goes on a real journey and in the end when his character is finally free of cancer it is a real fist in the air sort of moment. The film earns that. Seth Rogen is also unusually good here in a more paired down dramatic role, though some of his usual schtick does come through here and there. I think Rogen can be a really charming and talented dramatic actor given the right roles.

The comedy drama mix of the film is fairly mixed, I would say it leans more towards the latter than the former although there are a few funny moments here and there that actually did make me laugh.

Overall, a strong film that everyone should see.

Pros.

It is funny

It is sweet

It takes you on an incredibly nuanced ride

It isn’t afraid to ask and tackle tough questions and topics

Levitt

Cons.

A few minor pacing issues

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The Holiday Calendar

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A psychic advent calendar helps a young woman, played by Kat Graham, to see her future.

I will admit this film’s premise has some goofy appeal, a psychic advent calendar at least feels fresh, I haven’t seen one of them in a Christmas film before, however this freshness is quickly undone as the calendar is merely used as a means to an end to enter into the usual holiday rom-com cliches.

Indeed it seems I hoped for too much with this film as it quickly becomes generic. All of the rom-com cliches and tropes are dusted off and forced out on stage for good measure, the love triangle feels incredibly obvious in where it is leading and there are no stakes at all in the whole thing as we all know how it is going to end.

The acting is all fairly sub-par and for Graham who I know can act because she was okay on The Vampire Diaries this is clearly her slumming it for an easy paycheck.

Overall, even the whacky premise can’t save this film from becoming a bag of cliches and tropes.

Pros.

The goofy premise

It is watchable

Cons.

The pacing

It is generic

It is nothing you haven’t already seen before

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Black Panther Wakanda Forever: The King Is Dead And The Seat Is Empty

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Wakanda copes with the death of its King.

In many senses this is a depressing film, it doesn’t just address the real world passing of Black Panther star Chadwick Boseman this film lives it and throughout the film Boseman’s death is never too far away, we are given many reminders of it.

However, I did enjoy for the most part that this film has a serious tone, too many of Marvel’s Phase 4 projects have really leant hard on the humour and it has hurt them. This for the most part plays everything very seriously and that is good and helps the film to feel impactful and maintain stakes. Although, an issue to this is the inclusion of Riri Williams, played by Dominque Thorne, who for the most part is annoying and forces in a lot of corny jokes where they just aren’t needed. Moreover, Williams is never specifically said to be the Iron Man replacement of the MCU but it feels like she is being pushed that way, and boy does she feel like a off brand version of the character.

I really liked that this film finally introduced Namor, played by Tenoch Huerta Mejia, into the MCU I think he is easily the best thing about this film and certainly is a scene stealer. A lot of the underwater scenes with him and his people are really cool and interesting and for the most part the effects hold. However, the CGI does prove to be glaringly bad on a few occasions which is quite poor when you think about how much money was pumped into this film.

The cast for the most part are a mixed bag Danai Gurira and Angela Basset give stirring performances and are very deserving of praise, but Winston Duke is mostly passed over and ignored and Letitia Wright is noticeably bad and clearly finds it hard to emote as throughout Shuri’s ride in this film her face barely changes scene to scene be it happy, angry or sad. Another thing that bugged me about Shuri in this film is that all of a sudden she can fight and it makes no sense, she becomes Black Panther and then whoops Namor despite being tactical support in the last film and for the early parts of this one. Where did this sudden training come from? It would have taken one line to have tied this off and not have it be an issue, but no, to me it reeks of the writers thinking that the audiences are too dumb to pick up on it. Another dumb plot whole is why does Wakanda not just tell the world about Namor and his people and how they are responsible for all the attacks rather than taking the blame themselves? It makes no sense and the film does not address it.

Overall, slightly worse than the first film but it does introduce Namor to the MCU so that’s pretty cool.

Pros.

Namor

The mature tone

The ending

Cons.

Riri is annoying and breaks a lot of the tension with dumb jokes

Wright can’t act and Shuri develops all these fighting skills out of nowhere

The poor CGI and plot holes

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Living: Make The Most Out Of Every Second

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

An office worker, played by Bill Nighy, discovers he only has a few months to live and sets out to live his life to the fullest during his remaining days.

I will preface this review by saying that this is not an easy film to watch on multiple levels, it is both depressing and also at times extremely cringey, especially when the overly formal period characters can’t express themselves at all, but that is all part of it and part of what makes this film so good.

This film truly feels like a British film, by that I mean if it were an American film especially one made by a Hollywood studio then it would have been overly sentimental and sickly sweet, this wasn’t that. The things left unsaid because the character physically couldn’t say them and the bittersweet enjoyment to the man’s final months feels raw and authentic and in that the film presents us with real truth. In that regard I found the ending of the film particularly powerful.

The performances across the board were strong but of course both Bill Nighy and Aimee Lou Wood deserve to be singled out for extra praise. Nighy conveys a lot whilst saying very little and really puts his character through an emotional ringer over the course of the film. Whilst Wood manages a real warmth and plays of Nighy well, they make for a strong on-screen pair.

Overall, not an easy watch, but an enriching one.

Pros.

Nighy

Wood

The emotional nuance

The ending

Cons.

Pacing issues

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