Bill: The Untold Story Of Shakespeare, When He Became A Spy

Bill is a historical comedy film directed by Richard Bracewell. The plot revolves around the early days of William Shakespeare (Matthew Baynton), as he tries to make it as a playwright. There is also a plot to assassinate Queen Elizabeth 1^st (Helen McCrory), that Shakespeare gets wrapped up in and has to prevent.

The comedy here is a little more adult, than I would expect from the PG certificate. Right from the off I was surprised about the number of sex jokes in there, I don’t remember them being in Horrible Histories, that said I am not complaining about this fact I actually found it rather amusing and the film made me laugh several times.

The Horrible Histories trope are all put well to use here. Though I would say Martha Howe-Douglas was relegated to nothing more than the supporting wife role and I would have liked to see her have a larger and more important part, or really be able to take part in the fun assassination plotline.

Furthermore, though the film is fun, and a lot of that fun does originate from the narrative, it is definitely overstuffed. The film tries to do too many things, it tries to be a Shakespeare origin story of sorts, it tries to tell this international spy game intrigue plot line, and a few other odd twists and turns as well. Now I can’t fault there ambition with making the film so densely packed, but I can fault there execution as none of the elements came together in the way they should, and part of the film even felt a bit boring.

Pros.

It’s funny

It’s fun

The cast are great

Cons.

Howe-Douglas deserved more to do

There was far too much going in a narrative sense

3/5

Reviewed by Luke

Never Be Done, The Richard Glen Lett Story: A True Inspiration

Never Be Done: The Richard Glen Lett Story is a Canadian documentary film based on real events. The plot follows the fall of one of Canada’s most beloved comics at the hands of drug and alcohol abuse, and also how he managed to come back from his darkest point and turn his life around.

Inspiring, is a word that gets tossed around a lot. Often people use it either hyperbolic-ally or falsely when talking about feel good films they have seen, as few films are truly inspiring; though I suppose different films are inspiring to different people. However, this is one of the few films I would truly use that word to describe.

This film is a roller-coaster of emotions we go from dizzying heights, to soul crushing lows and all the while we follow this man and his struggle. The film does not shy away from showing the unpleasant side of addiction, in fact it displays it in all its infamy and for that I applaud it. Due to this we form a real bond with Richard as well feel like we are right there along with him.

I have to say this film brought me close to tears a number of times, it is not for the light of heart, or the easy to tears as there are some really harrowing moments here. The tears, I believe are proof of how much you end up caring about this man and his struggles.

Overall, this is a beautifully made film that is honest and raw and leaves you with a lot to consider afterwards.

Pros.

The beautiful message

The journey

The connection we form

The emotional impact

It is not afraid to show the dark side of addiction

Cons.

None

5/5

Reviewed by Luke

My Christmas Inn: How Charming Is Small Town America? Really?

My Christmas Inn is a Christmas based romantic comedy directed by Peter Sullivan. The plot sees big city advertising executive Jen (Tia Mowry- Hardrict), head to a small Alaskan town to inherit her Great-Aunt’s inn. Naturally whilst there she falls in love and there is some needless conflict that resolves itself just in time for Christmas.

This is the last of the low rent Netflix-Hallmark made for TV Christmas romantic comedies that I will be reviewing. As I was writing that plot description I was getting flashbacks to many other similar holiday rom coms that I have reviewed recently, so with that in mind I am going to call it quits on this front after this review is done.

There is nothing good or bad about this film it is just incredibly bland. It is clear no care goes into these films and it seems like they have a check list of things to include. This includes the forced romance that feels incredibly unnatural and neither actor has any warmth even slightly towards the other let alone chemistry. As well as a needless crisis that could easily be resolved and is inserted into the film to try and give it some stakes, which it then fails at doing anything with.

Overall, there is nothing redeeming about this film. It can’t even be bold and bad it is just cookie cutter generic to fit in line with hundreds of other bland boring holiday romantic comedies, stay far away from this one.

Pros.

It is watchable, if tedious is your thing

Cons.

The romance doesn’t work

The feel-good elements don’t work

All of the actors involved in this can’t act

The drama feels shoehorned in

It will put you to sleep, it is borderline unwatchable

0.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Critters: Never Trust 80’s Pop Icons, They Are Never Who They Claim To Be

Critters is a science fiction horror film Stephen Herek. The plot sees furry alien invaders from another planet arrive on Earth, in small town America of course, and start wreaking havoc. It is down to the efforts of one plucky family, a collection of towns people and two alien bounty hunters to stop them.

So the writers of this film claim that the ideas for it originated well before Gremlins, and that any claim that Critters is inspired by Gremlins are inherently false. While I can’t claim knowledge on the subject I have to say while watching I couldn’t help but be reminded of Gremlins as the two films are very similar in a number of ways.

I enjoyed that this film was not afraid to embrace the campiness of the science fiction horror premise with the Critters themselves being somewhat tongue in cheek often cracking wise. It reminded of many B movies I have seen; it is strange, and it knows it and displays it proudly.

The premise is generic, it is your standard alien invader/ or monster takes over a town narrative that is no stranger to creature features. However, the plot takes a back seat here to the fun absurdity of the film as a whole. It is a blast to watch.

Overall, if you want a campy B movie like good time then this will please you. Don’t go in expecting too much and you will be pleasantly surprised.

Pros.

It is fun

I enjoyed the tongue in cheek parts

I liked that it embraced its inner freak

Cons.

The plot is weak, and you have seen it before

The acting is very meh

3/5

Reviewed by Luke

Run: Sarah Paulson Plays Sarah Paulson Yet Again

Run is a thriller film directed by Aneesh Chaganty. The plot follows Chloe (Kiera Allen), a young girl who has been sheltered and kept in doors for most of her life. However, one day she starts to notice odd changes in her mum’s (Sarah Paulson) behaviour so decides to investigate and what she finds is far more sinister then she could ever have imagined.

This is a lame duck, this is dull, uninspired, and has been done better before. The twist serves to demonise women who go through a particularly traumatic event, I won’t spoil it here, and then once the twist is out there this just becomes like any number of other movies. Though, I won’t say what the twist is I will say that it is blindingly obvious from the start of the film, and yes, it does play out exactly how you would expect it to.

Furthermore, I am deeply unimpressed with Paulson’s performance here. It is fine but nothing out of the ordinary for her. I have come to realise that with Paulson it is the same performance in every role, this is no exception. She has as much range as a park bench and is a poor choice for a leading role.

The film also has pacing issues it makes the 90-minute runtime feel like double or even triple that and you are lured away by your phone because nothing on the screen can keep your attention.

Overall, deeply uninspired.

Pros.

Allen

A few well executed scenes

Cons.

Pacing issues make it a bore

Paulson is not a good lead

You have seen this film before

1/5

Reviewed by Luke

The Princess Switch, Switched Again: Wait What? I’m Confused

The Princess Switch: Switched Again is a Christmas set romantic comedy, drama film directed by Mike Rohl, serving as a follow up to the previous Princess Switch film, as well as taking place in the wider Netflix MPCA shared universe. The plot this time around see Princess Margaret (Vanessa Hudgens), go into crisis as she is soon to be sworn in as the new Queen of Montenaro. Never fear a switch with her double will save the day.

This film becomes incredibly confusing, as we now have three Vanessa Hudgens’ character that at points in the film all look identical; it borders on high concept filmmaking trying to keep track of them all in your head, let alone remember each’s storyline and arc.

The plot for the most part is trash, it is a cliché wrapped up in a trope; there is nothing new or innovative. However, surely you already knew that. I will thank the screen writer for not making this plot as predictable as I thought it was going to be, my first assumptions for where it was going where proven wrong and dare I say it I was somewhat surprised with where it went.

The film is really made by the delightfully over the top performance of Vanessa Hudgens who serves as a likeable lead and is different enough in all her characters for it to never end up feeling samey.

I also enjoyed the Rose McIver cameo from A Christmas Prince, it is nice to see the shared universe grow, it was a nice touch.

Overall, still fun, but a weak sequel by far.

Pros.

Vanessa Hudgens

All of the Hudgens characters feel separate and unique

The wider MPCA Netflix shared universe

Cons.

It is overly confusing

The plot is garbage

2.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Annabelle: Demons Patiently Wait On Lifts, Respect Social Distancing

Annabelle is a horror film directed by John R. Leonetti, serving as the first spin off film of the wider Conjuring Universe. The plot of this film focus on Annabelle, the breakout star of the first Conjuring film and goes a ways to explain how she ended up in the Warrens private collection; though to understand that you will have to watch all 3 Annabelle films.

I remember seeing this film a long time ago and I remember it being generic and boring. However, the other night, perhaps as a result of a masochistic feeling, I decided to revisit it and see if it was as bad as I remember. It is bad, definitely the weakest of both the Annabelle trilogy and the Conjuring Universe as a whole, but it is not terrible.

The only pro I have for this film is the basement life scene, when Mia (Annabelle Wallis), first sees the demon and she gets stuck in the lift. This I think is easily the best scene of the film, both in terms of scares and execution as it actually manages to feel tense.

The issues with this film for me are twofold. Firstly Annabelle Wallis should not be cast in anything ever, why is she? She can’t act and her name being associated with anything is a sign of poor quality, The Mummy, King Arthur Legend Of The Sword, Tag, I could go on. Wallis seems incapable of showing even the slightest amount of emotion in any sense, and to call her wooden would be a disservice to wood everywhere.

Secondly there is no third act in this film. Things just plod along in the usual investigative way these films do and then bang its over. There is no final standoff between Mia and the Demon, no, instead she almost throws herself out a window, but then she doesn’t and someone else does; wow gripping stuff there.

Overall, though this film isn’t as terrible as I remember it being it is still bad, not worth your time and easily the weakest of the Conjuring films; takeaway stop casting Annabelle Wallis.

Pros.

The lift sequence

Cons.

Annabelle Wallis

There is no third act

The doll really isn’t all that involved

There is a lot of aimless plot that goes nowhere

It does not justify its existence as a spin off

1/5

Reviewed by Luke

The Mortuary Collection: Rubber Up

The Mortuary Collection is a horror anthology film directed by Ryan Spindell. The plot follows Montgomery Dark (Clancy Brown), as he retells tales of horror to a job applicant at his funeral parlour.

The issue quite often, with anthology films is they are dependent on the individual segments being well done and crucially, consistent to make the overall film feel good and worth the watch. That really shows here, as though the segments are for the most part consistent, some are much better than others. The tales themselves are a mixed bag, some like the one about male pregnancy are strong are tightly packed, whereas others, the one about the carer who ends up killing his locked in wife are dull, lifeless, and boring.

This as you can imagine leads to pacing issues, as some parts of the film captivate your attention and others put you to sleep.

The ending however is insanely predictable. The twist is telegraphed quite blatantly from the opening of the film and when it happens, rather than feeling surprised you are left feeling angry it has taken them this long to get to it. The ending is very much a damp squid and serves to further undermine and bring down the film as a whole.

Overall, though some of the segments have promise this is very much yet another deeply average horror anthology that serves to bore more than scare.

Pros.

Some of the segments are well done and interesting

Clancy Brown is having fun

Cons.

Other segments feel tediously dull

The film feels inconsistent as parts of it are good and other parts diabolically bad

The ending is terrible

0.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Headhunters: Never Let Anyone Touch Your Hair

Headhunters is a Norwegian action thriller film directed by Morten Tyldum. The plot follows art thief Roger (Aksel Hennie), as he unknowingly targets the wrong mark and finds himself being hunted down by a tracking expert. The film serves as an adaptation of the Jo Nesbo novel of the same name.

This was a very stylish action thriller; glossy would be the word I would use to describe it. I enjoyed the unfolding mystery and how nothing was as simple as it first seemed, the premise that I listed above is a vast simplification. Said mystery makes for a very tense viewing experience, where you never quite know what is going to happen.

Nikolaj Coster- Waldu plays the films antagonist Claus, the man who hunts Roger down mercilessly over the course of the film and he is truly menacing. Not menacing in the sense of him being over the top and scary but, menacing in the sense of him being relentless and basically just an unstoppable corporate killing machine.

I enjoyed the ending immensely; it was nice to see Roger finally best Claus and it was done in a clever way that I found enhanced the whole experience. The final fight did not just boil down to a brawl it was far more intelligent than that.

Overall, a smart crime film that kept you on the edge of your seat as you never knew how far away Claus was from finishing the job.

Pros.

Hennie

Coster-Waldu

The mystery and the overall sense of tension

The ending

Cons.

There is only so many times you can see someone narrowly avoid being killed before it becomes unrealistic.

4/5

Reviewed by Luke

House Of The Witch: Is Being Killed By A Witch Worth A Quick Shag?

House Of The Witch is a horror film directed by Alex Merkin. The plot follows a group of kids who go to a house in their neighbour hood that is supposedly haunted, where others have gone missing in the past, to have a kissing party on Halloween; rather unsurprisingly things go wrong, and the teens start dying.

So yes the plot of this film is deeply generic, as are the cast. However, there is something about this film that I can’t quite put my finger on, it has a diamond in the rough sort of quality to it. I think a lot of this comes from the film’s scares. Even though there are a few jump scares, which are automatic marks down in my book, the scares for the most part are effective and well done. I applaud the films horror it is by far its strongest element.

In the beginning the witch effect, which are noticeably cheap looking bothered me and took me out of the film, but as it went on I started to enjoy it and found that it added to the charm of the film.

The twist at the end of the film leaves you scratching your head a bit, not because it is confusing as it is heavily foreshadowed, but because of the way it is shot. The final sequence itself is quite jarring, as the girls face changes somewhat and you are left saying “wait what who is that?”.

Overall, though you have seen many films like this before there is still a rough charm to the film and the scares are good, not great by any means but definitely passable.

Pros.

The scares

The effects

The witch herself

Cons.

The twist ending

It is deeply generic

3.5/5

Reviewed by Luke