The Queen’s Corgi: Not Suitable For Kids

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Queen’s priced corgi Rex, voiced by Jack Whitehall, goes missing and must find his way back to the Palace.

In many ways this is not a film for kids. There are a lot of adult jokes and references that kids just won’t understand. Whilst I do enjoy this films lambasting of Trump, I think more broadly that this films comedy should have been toned down. For lack of a better terms these anthropopathic dogs are horny and make constant sex jokes which feels uncomfortable at times. Couple this with a sequence in which Rex is being hunted down by Trump’s female dog in order for the two of them to breed, which Rex, does not want, and is somewhat assaulted and you can see there is a lot of bad taste issues here.

The film as a whole is fairly by the numbers, it is a plot that you have seen many times before with cliched characters that you will have met many times over the years especially if you watch a lot of animated films. I would say that this film approaches so bad it is good range, but doesn’t quite get there as the bad taste stuff holds it back rather than adding any sort of charm to it. Ultimately you are left questioning the screen-play writer.

Overall, a strange film that most certainly isn’t for children.

Pros.

The Trump parody

The Queen and Prince Phillips relationship

Cons.

The sex jokes

The icky and troublesome sequence with Trump’s dog

It is aggressively by the numbers

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The Pentaverate: Mike Myers Enters The Culture War

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

5 men run a nice secret society that tries to help the world this is their story.

I am a big fan of Mike Myers and was looking forward to this series for a while, but sadly when I came around to watch it I found it to be far from perfect.

My major issue with the show is its final episode and ending, in which all the white male characters literally kill themselves for the sake of making the secret society more diverse and representational. This is the most obnoxiously on the nose thing I have seen in a while and feels like you are having a message forced down your throat. I thought the point of advocating for wider representation within media was to bring more chairs to the table not to remove them? Maybe I misunderstood.

The reason I am leading with that is because it really ruins what is otherwise a mostly good run. The first 5 episodes are all funny, charming and very watchable. There is a lot to enjoy here from the Jeremy Irons’ intros and the Shrek reference to the Key and Peele joke. I do think however, that killing off Keegan-Michael Key so early into the series was a bad idea as Ken Jeong is a poor replacement.

The humour on the whole is more hit than miss which I suppose is an achievement for a Netflix comedy series.

Overall, if you watch the first 5 episodes on their own then this show is quite good however sadly the final episode ruins the series in a major way by making the whole thing about spreading a message.

Pros.

It is funny

It is a mostly good showing for Myers

It is very creative

Cons.

The message is forced down your throat

Some outdated takes about the internet

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Black Ball: It Is Hard To Like A Cheater

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The bad boy of British bowls is born.

This film is almost entirely devoid of any charm. The whole premise feels as though it has been done before many times over, and nothing new is done here. The cast are almost entirely without any warmth or charm and you spend your time wondering asking which character you dislike the most.

My biggest question is why did they book Vince Vaughn for this? And also why did Vince Vaughn want to do this project? I don’t have answers for either of these questions but I spent a large portion of the film being baffled by his involvement.

Usually I would never have a bad word to say about Paul Kaye, but here is a rare exception. Kaye is not a good leading man and even when he wins in the end and it is supposed to be a happy ending you still find it hard to like him, due in no small part to the fact that the team win by cheating.

Overall, a waste of time and money, with a few funny moments that make it slightly more bearable

Pros.

A few funny moments

Vince Vaughn always gets a point from me

Cons.

Kaye

Almost everyone is unlikeable

The film doesn’t need to exist

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The Boys: The Only Man In The Sky

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Homelander, played by Anthony Starr, splits further off the rails and the Boys continue their investigation into the fallen supe Soldier Boy, played by Jensen Ackles.

This was an improvement on the first episode in a couple of ways. I enjoyed that the series didn’t mess around with the will he wont he question around Butcher, played by Karl Urban, giving himself powers and just went straight for it. I am excited to see where this plotline will go.

Moreover, I enjoyed where the Soldier Boy storyline went I am looking forward to seeing more of Laurie Holden’s Crimson Countess and think she will be a welcome addition to the rouges gallery of the show. In that vein I also like that the show is continuing to push Homelander into becoming an outright villain in the public’s eyes and thought that killing off Stormfront, played by Aya Cash, was a bold step in doing that.

Again much like the first episode the thing that I am the least happy about is the separate Hughie, played by Jack Quaid, plotline as I feel that it continues to feel like filler and for the most part I just want him to get back involved with the rest of the Boys. The relationship drama that I complained about in my previous review is still here to a degree though thankfully it is down on the last episode.

Overall, the series is getting into its flow and looks to be heading in an interesting direction.

Pros.

Butcher getting his powers

Holden’s Crimson Countess

The further descent of Homelander

The continued mystery of Soldier Boy

Cons.

The Hughie/Annie relationship drama and other slow side plots

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Gangster No.1: More American Psycho Then Lock Stock

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

An east end gangster, played by Malcom McDowell, recounts the story of his rise to power.

I thought this film felt very original and had a voice entirely separate from the early noughties gangster fare put out by the likes of Guy Ritchie. In many ways this film has more in common with American Psycho then it does Snatch and is all the better for it.

I thought the philosophy of this film and its comments on what it means to have it all where interesting and McDowell does a good job playing unhinged, although Paul Bettany who plays the younger version of McDowell’s character does out stage him on a number of occasions in terms of sheer fright factor.

Where this film was weaker for me was in the few instances wherein it was trying to replicate Ritchie’s style and have that same sort of tongue in cheek irreverent tone, that I think didn’t work. I think this film could have been better if it had played itself more straight and been more of a character study into the mind of a crime boss. Ultimately, I think the film should have leaned into its own voice more and stayed away from what was popular at the time.

Overall, a fun and interesting film when it is leaning into the warped psychology of a gang enforcer, less so when it is trying to rip-off Lock Stock.

Pros.

Bettany

McDowell

The physiological spin

Cons.

The ending doesn’t land in a dramatic sense

It is trying to hard to be like a Guy Ritchie film at times

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The Boys: Payback

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

One year after Stormfront, played by Aya Cash, is outed for being a Nazi the world has a whole new view on superheroes.

I thought that this was a slow first episode for the most part. I understand why the show has chosen to start in this way, to show the changes in the characters and the world but I just thought that compared to other season openers this one was a little light on action, though the sequence with the shrinking superhero was a fun little bit of gore.

I like where this season is heading, with the Boys themselves having superpowers in order to fight the supes, like they did in the comics, and with them investigating an obscure old superhero group; there is a lot of promise for where it could all go. Likewise, I am enjoying seeing the series push Homelander, played by Anthony Starr, to the edge I think it is quite clear that before the season is out he will snap and become outwardly villainous in a very public way.

I am less than keen on the Hughie, played by Jack Quaid, and Annie, played by Erin Moriarty, relationship drama and feel like it is being used to pad out the season, maybe because they don’t have as much footage as they would have liked because of covid. I hope that in the coming episodes we can move away from the relationship drama because honestly it is boring and a little trite.

Overall, a good first episode if a little underwhelming.

Pros.

The tease of the Boys getting powers

The looming mysteries

The ending

The shrinking superhero sequence

Cons.

It is slow

The Hughie/Annie relationship drama

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South Park, The Streaming Wars: Going The Way Of Family Guy And The Simpsons

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Due to a water shortage in South Park streaming services crop up to try and find new ways to supply water to the townsfolk and turn a tidy profit.

This was not a good special and honestly makes me question whether South Park is starting to loose its edge. Recently I have been binge watching all the episodes of the show from the beginning and as such when I compare earlier classic episodes to this I have to say there is a noticeable decline in quality.

My main issues with this special is just how unlikeable everyone is. Both Randy and Cartman, voiced by Trey Parker, are not just being dicks but are deeply unlikeable. One can argue that this is nothing new for Cartman but it is for Randy, who is reduced to a one note cliché here. Honestly, since starting Tegridy Weed the show has really been running Randy into the ground.

Moreover, the commentary on streaming services, here being water distributors rather than tv and film, is paper thin and feels really quite off the mark. I have noticed some people say how angry and personal the commentary feels and they are then using this reading to imply that Matt Stone and Trey Parker are not happy at Paramount +, however, I think rather than that it is just a regurgitation of other tired complaints against streaming. Odder still, the complaints levelled feel like they have come out of the mid twenty tens rather than our current climate.

Overall, watchable but the decline is clear to see.

Pros.

It is nice to see ManBearPig return

A few good jokes

Cons.

Randy is ruined

Cartman is awful

The commentary doesn’t land

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Elizabeth A Portrait In Parts: One To Anger Both The Royalists And The Anti-Royalists

1.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A documentary about the life of Queen Elizabeth II told in parts.

Man, there was a lot wrong with this film. I am going to assume that a lot of the more questionable aspects of this were done for stylistic reasons because other wise I can see no clear justification.

Firstly to the issues of this as a documentary. There was no narration and no interviews it was simply a series of seemingly connected bits of stock footage pieced together, sometimes this stock footage wouldn’t even be of the Queen but from films or other things which added to the confusion of the film. Moreover, there were a lot of odd time jumps within the film that made it hard to follow, an example would be intercutting the Prince Andrew Pizza Express interview between segments on Princess Diana, who thought this was a good idea?

Moreover, I found this piece to be manically depressing showing a woman who has given so much of herself to the public that she has nothing left. There are moments in this film were the Queen looks thoroughly miserable and like she hates the life she has been forced into. Maybe that comes from my reading of the film but it made it hard for me to get through.

Finally there are a number of odd musical choices such as a song by Stormzy and a song wherein the singer wants to have sex with the Queen, both of which feel disrespectful but also incredibly out of place, who did the score for this film?

Overall, a very bad attempt at documentary that will likely leave no one happy.

Pros.

It is at times so strange that it becomes funny

A few nice moments

Cons.

The out of place songs

It is depressing

It doesn’t work as a documentary

It jumps around far too much in a timeline sense

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Men: Too Art House For Its Own Good

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A young woman, played by Jessie Buckley, goes out to the British countryside for a few weeks to emotionally recover after the death of her abusive husband.

I thought this was a mixed bag of a film.

On the one hand I appreciated that this film felt fresh, and tried to do something new rather than repeating the same old same old as a lot of new horror releases do. Moreover, I also enjoyed the distinctly British feel to the horror, it reminded me of classic British horror films like The Wicker Man and early Hammer fare. I also thought both lead actors, Buckley and Rory Kinnear, were very strong in their respective roles and really sunk into their characters.

However, on the other hand I thought the third act had major issues and became too convoluted and pretentious for its own good. Once you get to the moment in the film where it is a series of live births then you know the film has gone off the rails. I am all for experimental art house indie horror fare, but if anything this felt too far in that vein. It is really not surprising at all that this film did not play well with general audiences. In addition, thought I applaud the social message the film was trying to convey I thought that the way in which it was done was a little too on the nose and heavy handed, as a result the script can at times feel strained. Furthermore, I thought the use of the green man and the folk horror motif felt a little generic and played out, the genre space has featured a lot from this aesthetic recently and as such this film needed to do more to make its folk horror stand out, it didn’t do that.

Overall, an original and very British horror film that certainly won’t be for everyone.

Pros.

Buckley and Kinnear

The originality

The British feel

Cons.

The entire third act is a mess

It is far too niche and art house for its own good

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Star Trek Strange New Worlds: Memento Mori

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Enterprise crew come under attack from the Gorn.

I think this might have been the best episode of Strange New Worlds yet, as it looked and felt like older Trek. Not just that but in this episode the show was really firing on all cylinders, with my only complaint being that it wasn’t longer.

I thought the focus on La’an, played by Christina Chong, nicely paid off her early character work and gave her a platform to shine. Chong really is one of the best performers on this show and we saw proof of that here as she gave a powerful performance.

I enjoyed seeing Captain Pike, played by Anson Mount, in action as well and thought that Mount continues to be the anchor of this show easily holding his own against other Star Trek veterans like Stewart and Shatner. The battle scenes felt really tense and fast paced which really helped the show to escape a lot of its usual issues with needless side characters and subplots.

Overall, a fun episode that restored my faith in this series.

Pros.

Mount

Chong

The battle scenes

It felt like old Trek

Cons.

It was too short

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