Monkey Man: Killing The Guru

Summary

This was a massive surprise, both in terms of the quality of the film but also that Dev Patel has really strong action chops both behind and in front of the camera.

Going into this film I was expecting more of a thriller than what this was which was a straight up action film. The action here is brutal and you feel every punch, I wouldn’t quite say it was on the same level as John Wick at the prime of that series but I would say that it was very gnarly at times and in ways you wouldn’t expect.

The story is the weaker part, so you care about Patel’s character and want to see him do well and get revenge for his mother, but the film gets far too bogged down in trying to have deeper themes. It tries to have things to say about India’s marginalised groups and systems of governance, a noble goal, but it comes off as shallow and without any punch. I think the film should either have tried to dedicate more time to the plight of these groups and set up Patel more clearly as their hero, or just ignored that part of the story all together and just focused on being an action film.

The acting across the board is strong, Patel is a likeable lead, but for me at least the star is Sharlto Copley. It is always a treat to see Sharlto act, he is one of my favourite actors if you couldn’t tell, he steals the show as a boxing promoter.

Overall, a very solid action film that tries for deeper meaning but comes up shallow.

4/5

Pros.

The action

You care about the characters

Patel and Copley

It has good stakes

Cons.

It is not as deep as it thinks it is

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Rebel Moon Part 2: This Time With More Scars And An Even Worse Haircut

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

As Netflix seems to exist to throw good money after bad and bring us the very worst films that an algorithm could come up with, we get yet another trip into Zack Snyder’s lifeless Starwars rip-off world, but hey if you don’t like it its because you like films made by a committee, Snyder paraphrase.

Where to even begin with this film. I think this film as well as its previous instalment makes us all owe WBD a big apology, everyone who ever took Snyder’s side and said but his DC films would have been good if they had just let him work was wrong. Categorically wrong. It is now clear to see that left unchecked to do the writing and the directing and the visuals and all this that Snyder is a hack who cannot make films. Michael Bay may make films for teen boys but at least he can do an action sequence and stich together a story, Snyder can’t do either despite people thinking he was good with action.

The story and the world just get worse all the time, with every detail we learn more about this world it makes less and less sense. Not just that the more you learn about it the more you see just how bafflingly dumb it is with coal powered space ships and hover carts that are pulled by horses, the whole physics of it just make no sense. It highlights how Snyder can’t write a script to save his life.

The cast are once again forced to appear here, I assume it is a Movie 43 style deal wherein no one wants to be in it they are just forced by legal means to turn up every day. I remember when the first film was savaged some of the actors said how upsetting that was for them and seemed to think they were making a film that was going to change the world, but sadly I have to break their delusions once again and say that they are starring in trash science fiction that will be forgotten after the next Adam Sandler film drops on Netflix which as everyone worth their salt knows is every other weekend.

Overall, if you ever doubted that Zack Synder is a hack director he has gone out of his way to prove it to you here.

0.5/5

Pros.

If you pause it for long enough Netflix will bring up recommendations for other shows and films you might like and some of them might be good and then you can watch them instead.

Cons.

It is stupid and the films eats its own tail with logic

The cast are barely even awake

It is too long

It is poorly made

It makes you angry that kids go hungry in this world whilst Hollywood throws money away on trash like this

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Spy X Family Season 2: Overview

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A spy, an assassin and a telepath pretend to be a happy family this time with added cruises.

I think this second season is even better than the first, in many senses the series really hits its stride here and gets into what you want to see from it.

The world building on display is solid and we get to find out a lot more about the lives of the characters we met in the first season and though there isn’t as much high stakes action as in the first season I think the character work here is stronger and that makes up for it. Also Yor’s fights on the boat more than match any of the action scenes we got in the first season.

The family boat trip is easily the best part of the entire second season, not only do the a and b storylines work really well together, it feels like an epic event as it spills out over so many episodes, and the final of the mini arc where they get to enjoy a nice family day out at the island is one of the most wholesome things I have seen on tv in a long time.

Overall, a fantastic follow up season with my only real complaint being that it is a lot shorter but hey at least we are getting a film fairly soon.

4.5/5

Pros

It is wholesome

It ups everything that worked from the first season

It has great action

The boat mini arc is my favourite so far

It is a lot of fun

Cons.

It is too short

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Spy X Family: Season One Overview

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A spy, an assassin and a telepath pretend to be a happy family.

This is one of the best animes I have watched in a while, and easily replaced some of my favourite animes in my all-time ranking. I would put it up there with Way of the Househusband, and Demon Slayer for sure.

I think what works so well about the first season of Spy X Family is how wholesome and sweet it is, but rather than have it be so soft that there are no stakes and nothing to care about and move the story forward, you have the action and the comedy elements as well which provide for a nice contrast. I think the three areas mesh well together as the healing aspects, action and comedy work together to create a well rounded package that does have something for everyone.

My one criticism of the first season would be that some of the B stories drag. Often you get an episode with an A and B story that both work well together and that provides the contrast I was talking about earlier, but sometimes you just get a random tacked on feeling B story that doesn’t add much and just feels like a way to pad out an episode which can then hamper even the most well done A plot.

Overall, a delightful time and an anime that I would say truly for everyone.

4/5

Pros.

The wholesomeness

The action

The comedy

The character work

Cons.

Some weak B-Plots

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Mutant Mayhem: A Mash Up Of Someone Being Sick

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Hello fellow children, a group of 40 year old guys reinvent Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for Gen Z and it uses all the buzz words you would expect but does that make up for the glaring issues? No.

I liked Splinter, voiced by the Communist Parties’ own Jackie Chan, and both his role as more of a goofy dad and also his whole arc about learning to trust humans again. I thought both were well done and got you to care about the character. I also thought that the animation style worked well and that during the fight scenes it really popped.

However, that is where my praise ends and my criticism of this film comes in four directions, the turtles themselves, April, the cringe lingo and the horribly and I mean horribly overstuffed cast.

So the turtles themselves bothered me as by having kids voice them it gave them a nasal quality at times that I found made them grating. Moreover, I didn’t like the whole oh they just want to go to high school thing it felt very contrived and out of character for them. When I watched the TMNT cartoon’s as a kid they wanted to be accepted sure but at the same time they want to be ninjas in the shadows not high school students.

April, voiced by Ayo Edebiri, is irritating not because of the race swap or what they did with her character design, but because her character really has no purpose other than to comment on the turtles and go ‘man that’s crazy’, which gets real old real soon. Oh and that’s almost forgetting her side story about sick which they reference again and again in a gross out sort of way to try and give her some character development which doesn’t really work.

The cringe lingo is seeing words like ‘sus’ which unless you are of a certain age or under a certain age you won’t know what that means. Again it is 40 something writers trying to seem hip and write how they think kids today talk. Moreover, the dialogue between the brothers is also quite grating, so I get that it is supposed to be what teenage banter between brothers would actually be like but again it just sounds like kids talking over each other a lot of the time and from a sound mixing point of view that was not great. Perhaps I am just comparing this to the version of the animated show I remember from childhood.

Finally there are just too many characters here, whilst yes some if not all of them are classic TMNT characters they were not all needed here by any means, it also means you have limited scope for villains in the future if they are all pally now. It tries to do too much.

Overall, okay with some redeeming moments but by and large this tries to modernise the turtles and makes them almost unrecognizable.

2.5/5

Pros.

Splinter

Some of the jokes

There is fun to be had

Cons.

The cringey slang

Too many characters

The turtle voices

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Damsel: Millie Bobby Brown Proves She Is A One Hit Wonder

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Netflix continues to try and make Millie Bobby Brown a thing, yet she continues to have as much charm as a true British great like Keira Knightly might have in one finger.

So if you needed a better example of what makes a modern Netflix film then look no further than this. Terrible CGI, a ridiculous and insulting girl boss story that makes little to no sense, and a world that feels like Bridgerton with dragons. Oh and it wastes the time of Angela Bassett and Ray Winstone giving them nothing to do and just using them as recognisable faces.

Do we need to go over the definition of a mary sue as it applies to cinematic archetypes? In case we do a mary sue is a character that has no progression and is great at whatever she tries for the fact that she is perfect and infallible. It is reductive girl power nonsense that strips away any humanity, flaws and character that a female lead can have and instead has her be this stoic, inhuman being. What sort of standard does this set for women? Again it is not empowering, they think it is with the idea that it is telling girls that they can be the dragon slayer, but girls already knew that, rather this film says that women have to be tough stoic and not feminine otherwise they are weak and part of the problem. It is incredibly reductive.

So Brown’s character is thrown by the evil male prince into a dragons lair as sacrifice, and even though we are not shown her sword fighting even for a scene in the film she is able to go toe to toe with it whereas a platoon of knights just got destroyed. Again this is cheap, rather than give her character an arc and make her human and fall and have to rise to the occasion the writers can’t be bothered to actually develop the female lead just having her immediately be perfect. It speaks to male writers that want to appear progressive but don’t actually care about their female characters so just use surface level girl boss tropes rather than make Elodie a developed character that you can actually care about.

Moreover, Brown is clearly a graduate of the Alaqua Cox school of acting as rather than try and make Elodie feel more human and real, Brown just plays the character with a constant layer of indignation ready to go on a lecture at any second. Though she is only young as we see her do more and more projects it is becoming clearer that she isn’t a good actor by any means and has clear limitations, maybe she is a one hit wonder, this would make sense why she hasn’t been cast in more Hollywood projects, outside of King Of The Monsters, and is largely now being propped up by Netflix.

Overall, just trash made by an algorithm with no care.

0.5/5

Pros.

It is unintentionally funny at times

Cons.

The CGI

It wastes Angela Bassett and Ray Winstone

The character is poorly written

The girl boss/mary sue qualities

It doesn’t actually update the trope it just recycles it and goes yes we know its bad

Argylle: The Matthew Vaughn Formula Has Gone Bad

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A best selling novelist, played by Bryce Dallas Howard, finds herself at the centre of a spy mystery.

I like Matthew Vaughn, his style, even his second Kingsman film, but I didn’t like this.

I had two major issues with the film. Firstly, I thought it felt tame, the violence was bloodless and secondly I thought the twist was incredibly obvious. I think for me the worst moment of the film was the big final battle at the end when rather than having a bloody shootout which is what you want out of an action film you have instead bright colours and smoke and they are dancing and shooting and you just go who is this for? Meanwhile the twist that Bryce Dallas Howard is in fact agent Argyll was so on the nose that you could have guessed it blind without having ever seen the trailer.

My pros of the film come with the fact that the cast is good and likeable and you do like the characters even if the story itself is played out and repetitive. I think Bryce Dallas Howard did a good job leading the film and that Sam Rockwell and Henry Cavill where good in their supporting roles.

Overall, this film deeply misunderstood its audience its all very well doing a spy spoof film but people still want to see bloody gory violence and not a colourful dance number.

2.5/5

Pros.

Howard

The wider supporting cast

It is very watchable

Cons.

The mystery is obvious

It has been done better before

It feels incredibly tame

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The Beekeeper: Burning Down A Call Centre Has Never Been So Efficient

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Jason Statham is just a man that likes to make honey at the weekends and then in the weeks burn down call centres.

This film was hilarious, I would imagine intentionally so, Statham’s character would commit a grave act of violence and then make a bee pun or comment and you couldn’t not burst into laughter.

Moreover, this was a good role for Statham as he got to be his usual tough guy persona but also have a little fun with it, I think in many ways this could be the start of a new franchise for him as it has the same charm as something like The Transporter did all those years ago.

The world of the Bee Keepers is also quite interesting and rife for exploring in the same way the world of the Continental was when John Wick first came out. I definitely think any sequel should lean more into that direction.

Overall, a good dumb action film.

4/5

Pros.

It is funny

Statham

It has many cheer worthy moments

The world of Bee Keeping

Cons.

The villains are fairly one note

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In The Land Of Saints And Sinners: A Shoot Up Down The Local

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Liam Neeson is a small town hit man in Ireland

I thought this film was quite good, bear in mind I am a big Neeson fan so I am more than likely being a bit forgiving if only unconsciously.

The premise of a hitman taking out the wrong person and drawing the ire of a larger group is nothing new, but the build here is what makes this film more. As the trio of IRA members circle the small town looking for Neeson you know a conflict is coming, and the film holds out on you until the very end, and when the shootout in the pub does occur it happens with such grandiose brutality that the whole film becomes worth it then and there.

Increasingly I see things about Neeson retiring or at least giving up action films, but I think there is no need for that I still think he’s a believable action force even now, after all Schwarzenegger continued with action rather later into his life than Neeson so I still think he has a few more action films in him.

Jack Gleeson gives a great performance here as well easily living up to his twisted character in Game Of Thrones though here he is supposed to be on the side of the angels. Kerrie Condon is also a good villain for the piece who you can both hate but also understand why she is doing what she is doing. A strong cast all round.

Overall, another solid Liam Neeson action film

4/5

Pros.

Neeson

Gleeson

Condon

A great third act

Cons.

It is slow getting to the action

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Expendables 4: The Quest To Get Sylvester Stallone’s Dignity Back

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Expendables are back due to no one’s demand.

This was lame, really that is the best way to describe this film.

When the last film came out at a lower age rating and it flopped, the creatives seemed to get the message and be like okay we’ll come back harder and more edgy for the next one and yet…. I would argue this is tamer than the third film. Yes there is more gore here but by and large this film doesn’t hold a candle to the gore of a John Wick. Moreover, the men are far from the action heroes they once were and now want to be soft for the most part or domesticated, again nothing wrong with that it could have been an interesting direction for the characters to go in, but not what you want out of your action franchise.

Most of the original cast saw this for the flop it was and stayed clear, Schwarzenegger for example is gone, as is Wesley Snipes, even Sylvester Stallone, whom I assume is the main driving force behind these films, is barely in it being killed off randomly near the start of the film and then coming back at the end.

For the most part this is Jason Statham’s film and he just about manages to be charming enough to keep it together, but again this isn’t one of his better action films. The dynamic between him and Meghan Fox is strong and the two play off each other well, do I buy them as a couple? No. I would even go so far as to argue that Fox steals the show and manages a takeover of this film as she does the team later on. I think that it may be worth if the studio wants to keep dipping into this pot of diminishing returns to have Fox lead the Expendabelles project that has been talked about and move in an all-female direction as this was woeful and it shows that a lot of the male cast members best days are behind them.

They also bring in Iko Uwais as the film’s villain and give him barely anything to do, don’t give him a brutal fight scene, ala The Raid, and then just kill him off. What a waste.

Overall, another franchise that needs to stay dead.

2/5

Pros.

Fox

Statham

Cons.

The original cast are either not here or are long past their best

The stuff with Stallone

The wasting of Uwais

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