The Unbearable Weight Of Massive Talent: The Best Nicolas Cage Film

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Nicolas Cage is paid to attend a wealthy man’s birthday party, once there he is forced into working for the CIA.

This was one of the best films I have seen in a long time, it never stopped making me smile.

I am a big fan of Nicolas Cage so I loved every second of this film, which is basically a love letter to Cage as well as to all of his fans out there; this is what the fans always wanted to see Cage at his full blown craziest. I do think you can be a fair-weather Cage fan or even a newbie to Cage and still get some enjoyment out of this film as it is simply just a really good time anyway.

Both Pedro Pascal, who plays the man Cage is paid to spend time with, and Cage himself are both having a lot of fun and you can tell that in every frame of this film. Their friendship is not only easy to root for but also one that you hope carried over outside of the film. The two had such great chemistry that I would love to see them star in a bunch more films together.

I thought the finale with the bang bang action set pieces was a weak point of the film but I enjoyed that it self-referenced this within the meta commentary of the film the two characters were making. We like them would have preferred for the film to be a serious drama about two men bonding over a shared love of Paddington 2 but as they say in the film ‘you need something for the trailer’.

Overall, one of the most enjoyable experiences I have had an the cinema in a long time.

Pros.

Cage

Pascal

The comedy

The meta references

The love towards the filmography of Cage

Cons.

None

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The Marvel Problem: Making Movies For Little Kids

Written by Luke Barnes

In this piece I want to talk about a recurring issue/concern I am having with the MCU, though it can apply to other franchises also owned by Disney, and that is being a slave to the family friendly audience, being too afraid to have morally complex heroes or God forbid anti-heroes.

A lot of these feelings were stirred up within me by two things firstly the experience of watching Moon Knight the TV show versus reading Moon Knight in the comics, and also the recent Star Wars debacle that is The Book Of Boba Fett. In both examples the titular leads are toned down and in some areas entirely different from previous portrayals, rather than being the cold, tactical bounty hunter that we have seen in other Star Wars projects including The Mandalorian Boba is all soft and fluffy in his own show, hugging animals and having other people doing his killing. This is also seen in Moon Knight where the character is much less violent and far more incompetent, this is done to fit the tone and the comedy of the MCU.

However, the way Moon Knight has been presented on screen leaves me with a problem, if Moon Knight is not allowed to be gory or more mature then how the hell are characters like Deadpool, Punisher and Ghost Rider going to be done justice; the Ghost Rider of Agents Of Shield was an awful take on the character. Kevin Feige said that Moon Knight as a show wouldn’t pull back it would show us the finishing blow, however in practice this simply isn’t true. We have seen a bit of blood on the characters hands and have seen some people die, but most of the time this has been cut away from or outrightly ignored, which becomes a turn off after a while.

Though in almost every other way the DCEU is worse than the MCU, the one thing I will give them credit for is that they are not afraid to be more mature and adult with their content, instead of pumping out CGI trash for little kids. Think about Peacemaker earlier this year a series that did well and became beloved whilst also dealing with adult themes and violence, can you ever imagine something like that existing within the MCU? No, no it would not and that is the problem. Disney and Marvel want to have their films appeal to as many different markets and demographics as possible so why not try appealing to adults. I understand that Disney is a family company but that doesn’t mean all their content has to be made for little children. Things like the Mandalorian give me hope that maybe Disney can get away from this bloodless family friendly approach but I am not too optimistic.

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Moon Knight: The Tomb

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Moon Knight, played by Oscar Isaac rushes to find Ammit’s tomb before Harrow, played by Ethan Hawke, in an effort to save the world.

I am quickly starting to lose interest in this show. The promise of really delivering a true depiction of this character is not coming to pass at all, very much like with Boba Fett in his show, the character has been toned down too much. The Steven persona is too silly and weak, and though he is supposed to be the more human side to the character he often just gets in the way.

I think there are so many better ways this show could have gone than the Indiana Jones knockoff it has become. I think tone is a big issue for this show because even in the final moments of the episode wherein the various Moon Knight personas meet another Egyptian God it is not treated with any pomp or seriousness but is instead served up as yet another joke, which hurts the show.

Another thing that is starting to irritate me is the constant baiting of the third persona Jake Lockley, the first tease was exciting, the second was okay we are almost there and then the third was like really are we still doing this. Bear in mind the character has been teased far more than 3 times on the show thus far.

The only redeemable aspects of this episode was the killing of the lead that felt gutsy, even if it did lead to the incredibly predictable mental institution sequence, and the continued greatness of Ethan Hawke and May Calamawy.

Overall, episode 5 needs to be pretty stellar to win me back, I’m fading off fast.

Pros.

Hawke

Calamawy

Cons.

The constant teasing of the third persona

The obvious mental institution twist

Steven’s weakness is starting to become annoying

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iCarly: i’M Wild And Crazy

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Carly, played by Miranda Cosgrove, realises she is the boring one of the friend group and so asks Harper, played by Laci Mosley, to take her on a wild night out.

This was a nice episode for the most part. I enjoyed seeing more of Harper and Carly’s friendship on screen and have them both get some much needed character development. I thought it was nice to see the series reference back to Harper’s breakup and her processing period rather than just move immediately past it and act like it never happened. I thought both Cosgrove and Mosley were on top form here as well.

However, the b-plot about Freddie, played by Nathan Kress, and Spencer, played by Jerry Trainor, coming to blows over there business partnership was not only dull but it also brought out the worst in Spencer as a character. I have written before in other reviews about how I dislike that the show treats Spencer as a constant get out of jail free card, with his undetermined wealth allowing him to do practically anything, it feels like lazy writing and it is on perfect display in this episode. The conflict between Spencer and Freddie comes about as Spencer buys them an old smoothie bar as an office location for their business and then slowly loses interest in their start-up and instead wants to restore the old smoothie bar. Within this conflict not only do we get yet another lazy set up paid for by Spencer’s magical wealth, but also Spencer being his most childish and ridiculous. These last few episodes have really gone out of their way to show that as an adult Spencer is a failure, he can barely function in the adult world and just throws money at things to make them go away, and though I never thought he was the most efficient character ever, I did think he was more competent than this. It is sad to see the character reduced so much.

Overall, a better episode than the last but the show needs to decide what it want to do with Spencer as a character.

Pros.

Carly and Harper’s friendship explored in more depth

Cosgrove

Mosley

The references to Harper’s break-up and the character growth

Cons.

Spencer is being reduced to a poor cliché

The b-plot serves no purpose

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X: Pornstars Versus The American South

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Ti West’s latest offering, of questionable taste, is porn stars verse an old couple with I guess super powers?

Obviously I am having somewhat of a laugh by suggesting that the old couple has super powers, but the film does seem to suggest that. Not only do they teleport around, the old lady, played by Mia Goth, seems to be everywhere at the same time, but they also perform kills on people half their age who are much more physically fit than them that can only be explained away by them possessing super strength, and pitch perfect accuracy.

On a more serious note a lot of people have lorded this film as a loving homage to exploitation horror flicks of the past, with Texas Chainsaw Massacre being an often made comparison. However, I think this film wishes it could be like those films rather than it actually being like them or is in anyway a homage. To me at least, it was a deeply generic slasher film that has been done a hundred times before and also much better than this, if that is what homage means then I have had the wrong definition all these years.

I will give the film prompts for its odd cult like religious elements they were by far the most interesting part of the film, but were explored nowhere near enough- hopefully the prequel can readdress them in more detail.

West tries to push the boundaries by including quite graphic sex scenes, but this just comes off as desperate and gimmicky. Bear in mind in a world cinema context these scenes are nothing and are practically puritanical, however within the deeply conservative world of Hollywood sex scenes these are challenging, and will leave you feeling more than a little awkward if you watch them in company.

Overall, a passable slasher film, but in no way deserving of the praise it has gotten.

Pros.

It is watchable

The gore is strong

I liked the religious cult like elements

Cons.

The sex scenes feel desperate

It is very generic

It has significant pacing issues

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Chicken Little: Zach Braff’s Illustrious Career

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A horribly rendered chicken, voiced by Zach Braff, thinks the sky is falling down and no one believes him.

This is one of those films that you look back on it now and ask how did this ever get made? It is the sort of film that only stoners could enjoy, as those of us who attempt to watch this sober have to deal with the frankly disturbing animation that belongs in the deepest recess of the uncanny valley or perhaps the lowest levels of hell.

Truly the animation is a barrier to entry. You can’t really afford the argument of oh that was years ago and CG animation was far less developed, because though there might be some truth to that it ignores the fact that Toy Story came out years before it and looks a million times better.

If you are brave enough to carry on past the awful animation then you will get caught in the reference zone, wherein this film will reference every single other Disney film in the back catalogue, or at least it feels like it does. There is nothing wrong with a few meta jokes here and there or even a lot if done right, but here it is just done for the sake of memberberies, with the references occurring at a speed that only a child could keep up with.

Overall, a very bad early attempt at CG animation by Disney.

Pros.

It is watchable

There is a so bad it is good quality to it

Cons.

The animation

The references

Braff

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The Lost City: Daniel Radcliffe Continues His Journey Into Strange

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A romance novelist, played by Sandra Bullock, and her cover model, played by Channing Tatum find themselves deep within the jungle, on an Indiana Jones like adventure.

Honestly I enjoyed the trailer for this film more than the film itself, which is sad as I had been eagerly awaiting this film for some time. I thought a lot of the film’s best jokes were wasted on the trailer, leaving the actual viewing experience as devoid of humour, with me laughing maybe once or twice at most.

I thought for the most part this was a deeply generic adventure film though it had its moments. I enjoyed the romantic connection between Bullock and Tatum, I thought they had great chemistry and were a very strong on screen pairing. Moreover, this film is a strong return to form for Tatum and marks yet another good step in his return to the big screen following on from a great performance in Dog. Likewise, Daniel Radcliff continues his journey as one of the most versatile and strangest performers in Hollywood with his character being a highlight of the film, whenever he came on screen the film seemed to pick up.

However, on the other hand this was a very by the numbers performance for Bullock, and Brad Pitt was barely in this film, again all his best bits were used in the trailer, clearly they couldn’t afford his day rate.

Another big issue I had with this film was its tameness, clearly in the beginning this film was supposed to be raunchier than it is, but was then made tamer to appeal to a wider audience in my mind this was a huge mistake.

Overall, entertaining but disappointing in the long run.

Pros.

Tatum

Radcliffe

It is very watchable

Cons.

Pitt

A lot of the good jokes were spoiled by the trailer

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The Nan Movie: Elder Abuse

1.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Catherine Tate tries to resurrect her career by bringing one of her characters from her noughties sketch show to the feature film realm, with rather unsurprisingly negative results.

Who was this made for? I am curious as this didn’t act as a gateway into Tate’s sketch show so it can’t have been for new audiences, maybe it was made for older fans but then if that was the case then why wait so long? It doesn’t make sense.

This films brand of comedy has not been funny or in vogue for about 10 years. This comedy can only be described as laughing at those with differences, the Little Britain sense of humour. There were multiple jokes in this film were the punchline was the fact that the lead, played by Tate, was being homophobic or laughing at a man in drag, not only is this not funny but it is borderline offensive. I am not one of those people to get up in arms over something not being PC, but here it felt mean spirited, excused away by ‘oh the joke is her reaction and her attitudes’, to me it felt like Tate and her fellow co-writer couldn’t think of any funny jokes so just decided to bash people not like them.

Moreover, I was sad to see Katherine Parkinson in this as she is so above this kind of slop that slumming it would be an understatement, I hope she at least got a big pay out for this appearance. The flashback stuff worked well, perhaps better than the present day sequences that range from nonsensical to desperate, sadly the flashbacks are undercut by the rest of the film and clash horribly.

Overall, a desperate film made for a bygone age.

Pros.

It is watchable

The flashbacks work well

Cons.

It isn’t funny

It is offensive

It wastes the talents of Katherine Parkinson

It is dull

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Operation Mincemeat: The Most Shocking Hand Sex Scene In The History Of Cinema

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A daring tale of WW2 espionage is ruined by a ham fisted love triangle that becomes distracting.

Before seeing this film I was excited the event this is based on is fascinating. For those of you who don’t know Operation Mincemeat was a British military plan whereby a corpse was floated ashore in Spain carrying false papers in an effort to convince the Axis powers that the Allies were going to attack Greece instead of Sicily. At the time the plan was deemed incredibly risky and is now viewed as one of the greatest feats of espionage ever. That premise sets this film up to be a good war time thriller, however, the focus is not on the operation itself really at all instead it focuses on the personal lives of the characters.

Colin Firth, Kelly MacDonald and Matthew Macfadyen, the three sides of the love triangle, all give good performances. The performances of those involved is not the problem, what is a problem however is the fact that the love triangle between these three actor’s characters becomes of greater importance to the plot than anything else. I thought it was entirely needless.

Moreover, during the Spain sequence there are these incredibly random sex scenes that just sort of come out of nowhere and feel weird. I don’t know if they are done in reference to real things that happened and were included for authenticities sake, but if they weren’t what are they doing in the film? The hand-job scene in particular had everyone in my showing of the film looking at each other in shock and confusion asking why this was happening?

Overall, though the film was very watchable and had good performances for the most part, the focus is in entirely the wrong place.

Pros.

It is watchable

Strong performances across the board

When they actually talk about the plan it is interesting

Cons.

The love triangle

The sex scenes

It has awful pacing

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The Jack In The Box: If You Find A Creepy Box In The Ground Leave It There

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A demon jack-in-the-box is discovered and brought to a local English museum, however, once situated people start to go missing and bodies start piling up.

This film won’t win any awards, but I enjoyed it for doing something new with the killer clown format, I don’t think I have ever seen a demonically possessed jack-in-the-box before on screen so in that regard this is a nice dose of originality.

Moreover, a further strength of this film is that it benefits from a certain B movie esque charm, you can tell that this film was made on a very low budget but it looks good for it, it gives the film more of a real world edge that helps to sell the demon jack-in-the-box more thoroughly.

However, my main criticisms of this film would be that the performances are fairly week across the board, no one not even the lead delivers anything even close to a good performance which at times can take you out of the film.

Overall, certainly not the best film you will ever see but there is an unmistakable charm and originality to this film that genre diehards will enjoy.

Pros.

The originality

The scares

The B movie charm

The design of the demon

Cons.

The performances are awful

The final twist is laughably predictable

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