A Quiet Place 2: Much Like The Walking Dead This Post Apocalypse Feels Repetitive

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

There was a lot of hype and excitement going into this film for me, many had said it was the film that was going to save cinemas, or that it was an experience unlike any other. As such I went in with high expectations hoping for the perfect sequel I had been promised, and honestly I was left disappointed.

If I had to describe this film to someone in a sentence I would say, ‘more of the same’, really there is nothing new here it is the same gimmick from the first film just done again. This time around they do explore the world a bit more, or at least that small part of it, and we get new situations that result in noise and monsters; the issue is these situations feel very similar to what we have already seen.

From a story perspective this film does not really push the needle for me, the big ending of this film feels like an afterthought of the first films ending and the whole journey there feels anticlimactic. A lot of things are shown and not explained, for no reason other than padding out the plot.

Finally, and on a positive note, I did enjoy the newcomer of Cillian Murphy I thought he fulfilled the surrogate father role rather well, and his was easily the most interesting arc across the film; I only wish we had more time with him.

Overall, this is nothing new if you liked the first film you will like this. I would not say this is the film to rush out and see in cinemas if you haven’t already been back as honestly I don’t think seeing it in that format, as opposed to watching it at home, adds all that much.

Pros.

Murphy

Blunt

Giving the kids more to do

Cons.

The padding

The ending is a retread

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Peter Rabbit 2: Comments On Current Capitalistic Shortcoming By An Emo Rabbit, Featuring Product Placement

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

This is an odd film both knowingly self-aware and also surprisingly reflective. Yes, it also has James Corden as a talking rabbit that wretches for a few minutes for a gag, pros and cons.

Something I want to point out about this film and many others referencing something as being bad and then doing it anyway does not make the film clever or meta if anything it makes the choice worse. This film does this by saying how bad it would be if the Peter Rabbit books were turned into American films and lost their way, they even look at the camera: they are simply stating a fact that in and off itself is not funny.

That said I did find this film surprisingly funny, both internationally and unintentionally. The Rooster and his deep thoughts about life remain the highlight of course, but I also found Domhnall Gleeson to be quite amusing this time around.

The story does feel a bit long in the tooth but has a nice message that manages to create happy feels by the end. Peter’s journey throughout the film does feel impactful and as there is growth there which is nice to see: Corden does his best to make the character off putting and irritating, but the film manages to prevail in spite of him.

I feel like this film was a step up from the first film and I wouldn’t be all that opposed to seeing a third film in the franchise.

Overall, a pleasant enough watch.

Pros.

The humour

The character growth

Domhnall Gleeson

Cons.

James Corden

The attempts at meta commentary

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The Waterman: As Dry As The Deseret

1.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

I feel like this film views itself as whimsical, and as using the fantasy nature of its story to actually tackle hard hitting issues but in a wonderous way; however, to me it just seems hollow. I find a good comparison for this film would be to A Monster Calls, they are similar in many ways with the key different here being that The Water Man has no soul.

This is a shame as the film desperately tries to create one, playing up the emotional impact of a lot of scenes to try and further the effect of fairly weak writing. In the end the film feels overly sentimental rather than impactful, with it entirely not understanding how to connect with audiences.

The one thing I will give this film props for however is the acting. I thought Rosario Dawson, and David Oyelowo were both strong and the child lead was bearable, which is saying a lot for a child actor.

Overall, you can see what this film was trying to do, but it just doesn’t seem to understand how to play with an audience’s heart strings creating in the end a film that feels both soulless and hollow, whilst also feeling overly sentimental.

Pros.

The acting

The fantasy elements are interesting

Cons.

The emotions are all wrong

A lot of the fantasy stuff is underdeveloped

The pacing

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Seance: A Boarding School For Mature Students

2.5/5

I have been very impressed by the prior work of Simon Barrett, he was involved in the creation of two of my favourite films of all time The Guest and You’re Next; however, in both cases he also had Adam Wingard as backup. Here Barrett is on his own, with this being his directional debut and it becomes clear very early on just how much Barrett needs his fellow mumblecore pioneers like Wingard, as this film begins to fall apart.

So before getting into all the reasons the film doesn’t work I want to give it praise for what it does well. The twist, that I won’t spoil here, that comes in towards the end of the film is actually surprising and I didn’t see it coming, it flips the film on its head which makes it infinitely more interesting.

The issues with this film mainly come from how cliché a lot of it is, all the teen angst/ mean girls stuff is incredibly played out from the beginning; and it is more than a little weird that all these ‘teen girls’ at this boarding school are actually late twenty/ early thirty year olds in real life- it makes the film somewhat unbelievable.

Furthermore, I did not find this film scary. The supernatural element feels again familiar and poses nothing new for genre fans or even those who watch more than one horror film a year: I found the scare set ups to be incredibly obvious as well.

Overall, very generic and mediocre.

Pros.

The twist

It is relatively well paced

Cons.

The supernatural element

The scares

The mean girls story cliches

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MA: Never Party With Someone Double Your Age

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

This film started with all the promise in the world, the idea of a middle aged woman who lures teens back to her basement to party has all sorts of troubling undertones. However, it is from there that this film starts to struggle.

The threat and the horror of this film are very human, yet that can only go so far, maybe if the writing was better, alas. We quickly get into a very overly familiar story of an unpopular girl who is picked on by the popular kids and then wants revenge, with some poisoning of your kid to keep them dependent on you thrown in there for good measure. From about the first third in I could accurately tell what was going to happen.

I don’t know what blackmail Blumhouse have on Octavia Spencer, but clearly it must be sizeable to get her to walk away from beloved TV shows and award winning films to star in this; a by all means average horror effort.

Overall, the film has promise, but then doesn’t do anything with it.

Pros.

A strong premise

A few good scares

Cons.

Overly familiar

Octavia Spencer deserves better than this

Not all that scary

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Digging To Death: A Great Upper Body Workout

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

I found this film funny, whether that was intentional or not remains to be seen but viewed as a horror comedy this film is a roaring success. I would say as is often the case this film tended to favour the comedy over the horror, and I didn’t end up finding the film at all scary.

There were a few tense moments that punctuate the film, but for the most part the tension is quickly lost, and silliness returns; this does become grating after a while as you want the film to at least take itself seriously slightly.

Something I will give this film a pro for is the look of the corpse, I enjoyed the low-fi approach they took with it, and thought the corpse looked quite striking and effective. We definitely could have used more of the corpse within the film.

The acting was all fine, nothing really to write home about, but serviceable enough that it didn’t become a problem or distracting.

Overall, a lot of fun, I hope for the film’s sake that it wasn’t trying to be a straight forward horror film, if that is the case then I would have to readjust my score as it is not scary at all.

Pros.

The humour
The ending

It is entertaining

Cons.

It is not scary

The tone is a little uneven at times

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The Doorman: Ruby Rose Needs A Better Agent

1/5

Written by Luke Barnes

The unlikeliness of Ruby Rose actually being able to overpower and physically best guys twice or sometimes even three times her size is never lost on me. Watching Rose as a cold calculating villain ordering foot soldiers to their death is far better and more believable than watching her trying to take on the action hero role herself.

This film is a clear Die Hard rip-off, and for most of the film it doesn’t even try to hide it. Rose’s character is ex-military, so of course when some vague ‘European’ baddies show up and try and take over the hotel that her dead sister’s Husband and kids live at she expertly manages to take them all down and keep everyone save.

The premise is beyond familiar, and we get back to the idea of this being a rip-off, however it feels more like a spoof. Whoever is Ruby Rose’s agent should be fired as they keep getting her these really generic action roles, that might help her to build a certain image, that of an action star, but at the same time show just how poorly she plays theses type of roles- it is double edged.

Moreover, the sub-plot regarding the fact that Rose’s character and her dead sister’s husband had an affair, and it is implied they still have feelings for each other, is icky and makes both of the characters deeply unlikeable.

Overall, hopefully someone in Hollywood will start making better decisions with their money and we will get less films like this.

Pros.

It is short

Cons.

Rose

The premise

It is generic

The icky subplot

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Wrath Of Man: Leave Your Lights On For Jason Statham

5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Recently I have been suck in somewhat of a purgatory when it comes to finding good films to watch, try as I like I keep ending up watching average films, or films that are good but also deeply flawed. However, just when I was starting to lose faith, I watched this.

For most of his filmography I have been a big Guy Richie fan, and this film was yet another hit for me. Jason Statham I am more mixed on, sometimes he can be good, other times he is woefully miscast here however he is great.

There is just something that works about this film, there are no glaring issues with it, and it had a smile on my face from start to finish. I thought the pacing was tight, there were no dips in interest or engagement, the action was strong with the shootout at the depot being a particular highlight and the tension was well maintained over the course of the film.

Moreover, I surprisingly also found this film to be very funny- deliberately. Yes, when I put this film on I did not think it would have lighter moments it seemed a very dark tale, but the tone does balance this, and allows for a few one-liners that help the film to stay enjoyable and not get too dark; and these lines are also quite funny.

Overall, it is nice to see Statham and Ritchie back on form, this film clearly illustrates the best of both men and makes for one of the more entertaining watches of the year so far.

Pros.

The action

The tension

The jokes

The cast

Statham

Cons.

None

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Candyman: The Candyman Can

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

I remember watching Candyman Farewell To The Flesh as a child and being scared out of my wits, it was this remembrance that caused me to go back and watch the first film recently and also to prep for the new sequel that is on its way.

So this film feels very unique, in a Clive Barker-esque way. Though Barker didn’t write the film, it is based on one of his stories and he was involved as a producer, this is clear to see as his finger prints are all over this film. Anyone familiar with Barker’s other works will be able to see what I mean; it is something special that is hard to put into words- the plot and style of the film reflect this.

Moreover, this film features one of the all time masters of horror himself: Tony Todd, which in my book is always a bonus point. We don’t get to see a lot of Todd throughout the film, though his presence is felt. However, the few scenes we do have with him are all very strong and he presents the character with a certain otherworldly, ethereal energy that is hard to look away from.

The characters outside of Todd’s villain are all fairly lacklustre, and the story itself is very familiar-especially if you are a genre fan like me. In my opinion the framing of the lead for Candyman’s crimes was perhaps the weakest part of the film as it has been seen so many times before across the genre and it was entirely predictable.

Overall, strong but not without flaws.

Pros.

Barker’s influence

Tony Todd

The style

Cons.

The lead was very meh

The storyline was predictable and weak

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The Unholy: Modern Miracles, Seeing Isn’t Believing

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

I have been waiting for this film for some time, with perhaps too high expectations.

I am a big Jeffery Dean Morgan fan and his last foray into horror The Possession was terrific, this only caused me to get more excited for this film prior to seeing it. Before I get into some issues I had with the film, I want to state that Morgan and his performance is a bright spot of the film and he leads this film with a gusto.

My issues with this film come from its themes and messages, the film can’t seem to decide on what sort of tact it wants to take with regard to religion. At times the film is very critical of organised religion, especially Catholicism, but then at other times it is very much into embracing it. I would have preferred the film to take a hard line and focus more on the issues of organised religion from a horror stand point, but the film bends in the end. It is for this reason I don’t like the ending.

I think the horror of this film works and it did leave me chilled, however some of the effects don’t look good and the film as a whole looks a little cheap. The film is better and crucially scarier when slight things are happening rather than full on sequences where the demon/witch is moving around.

Adding to, this film features an annoyingly large amount of really repetitive jump scares that it should have cut out as they are neither scary, nor well done.

Overall, a decent if flawed horror film.

Pros.

It is unsettling

Jeffery Dean Morgan

The criticisms of organised religion

Cons.

The ending

The jump scares

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