Howl: Somehow British Public Transport Is Made Even Worse

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A train breaks down in the middle of nowhere and to make matters worse werewolves begin to terrorise those on board.

This is a fairly strong British werewolf film, is it Dog Soldiers good? No but few films can be. There is something so intimately familiar to the British experience within this film, the grubby train packed with angry people that breaks down; I have been there many times. Well maybe not recently in these Covid times.

Speaking of Dog Soldiers I enjoyed seeing Sean Pertwee appear in this film, he is always a very welcome presence as far as I am concerned. However, they kill him off almost immediately which is of course a huge missed opportunity. The cast we do get more time with are all serviceable though no one is particularly stand out.

The werewolf makeup effects and design were interesting, and we do get several good looks at them over the course of the film. I liked that this film felt like it was creating a fresh take on the creatures rather than trotting out standard genre cliches, the glowing eyes I thought were particularly effective.

Overall, a passable film that is fun to watch but one that won’t blow you away or stay in your mind long after watching.

Pros.

The werewolf design and makeup

The very British scenario

The ending

Cons.

Killing of Pertwee early

Pacing issues

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Anna And The Apocalypse: The Version Of High School Musical That The Disney Channel Rejected

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A Scottish highschool finds itself in the middle of a zombie apocalypse.

I had heard lots of positive things about this prior to watching, however I did not end up liking it. The people I spoke to about this film prior to watching it had left out one key aspect, namely that it is a musical. I really didn’t like that part of the film.

The songs in this film aren’t good. Yes, that is a personal taste thing on my part but every time someone started singing in this film I started to cringe. It felt like a knock off High School Musical clone without the talent, zombies aside. I understand what they were trying to do merging horror and musical elements is a novel idea, accept Sweeny Todd did it about ten years earlier and then there is Rocky Horror so maybe not so fresh an idea after all.

The horror elements are okay but again nothing game changing. For me the best part about this film was seeing Paul Kaye get to have some fun as the evil schoolmaster. Kaye is a tremendous actor, and he was the only reason I kept with the film.

Overall, Paul Kaye is always fun but everything else just doesn’t work.

Pros.

Kaye

It is unintentionally hilarious

Cons.

The songs are Disney Chanel reject quality

The elements don’t come together well

It is cringey

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American Horror Story: Take Me To Your Leader

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A group of teens have a run in with aliens and find themselves pregnant as a result.

I very much believe that this season of AHS has been designed to kill the show, as those responsible for it want to move on to better things. Do you remember the time when AHS was actually scary? I do but seemingly those writing the show now don’t. The ending of the episode where all the teens find themselves pregnant is not scary in anyway, it is hilarious at how dumb and contrived it is; worse yet the show seems to want you to laugh.

So far this half of the season feels like the discounted one as a lot of the top name talent of the show doesn’t return and we are left with less than stellar actors filling out the cast. Now that is not to say there is no talent here as Neil McDonough is always a treat, but sadly even he can’t save this episode.

AHS fans have been clamouring for aliens to return since the era of Asylum, and the show has teased them out for so long, yet this is what we get? It goes beyond anti-climactic.

Overall, please let this season end.

Pros.

McDonough

The opening scene is strong

It is hilarious entirely unintentionally

Con.

It is not even trying to be scary anymore

It feels like a joke

They manage to ruin aliens

Ryan Murphy’s influence is slowly killing the show

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Nacho Libre: The Greatest Wrestler Of Them All

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A Friar, Jack Black, dreams of becoming a luchador.

Before this viewing I had never seen this film all the way through before. Upon finishing it for the first time I found it to be enjoyable if not overly impressive.

Black is always very likeable and that is true here, his character of Ignacio is very easy to root for and you do develop a bond with him over the course of the film. Additionally he also gets several funny lines, I would say he was the only character in the film that made me laugh. Not all of the jokes landed, especially with the side characters, but enough of them did that it kept me engaged; Black has fantastic comedic delivery.

I enjoyed the look into the world of Mexican wrestling and luchador culture and think that more films should focus on it. Admittedly, I think the story would have been better served by having a Mexican actor in the lead rather than Jack Black as there was an element of white saviour to the film that I really didn’t like.

Overall, though the casting is troublesome I found this film to be enjoyable and even funny at times, not perfect but entertaining.

Pros.

Black

The comedy

The look into luchador culture

Cons.

The white saviour aspects

Not all the jokes land

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Intrusion: Are Netflix Even Trying Anymore

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The film follows a couple in the aftermath of a home invasion, focusing on how it affected each personally.

My, my we are back to the boring era of Netflix thrillers. This film was so dull and hard to get through. Indeed many times I almost turned it off. I found there to be nothing new about this film during its runtime and everything it said or was trying to say had been said better elsewhere.

The emotional impact it was trying to put across again feel puddle deep. The film seems to think it is a lot deeper and more intelligent in its observations than it actually is, try as it might it can’t seem to come up with anything interesting or fresh to say.

Furthermore, the acting was also very mediocre. Normally I find Logan Marshall-Green can do no wrong, but he was just given nothing to work with here and it really shows in his performance, in truth his character is little more than a cliché. Freida Pinto’s lead is likewise uninspired, her character reads as a discount version of various other better written characters over the years which is a shame as Pinto is a very good performer normally.

Overall, uninspired.

Pros.

It is watchable

It is short

Cons.

It is dull

It is predictable

The performances are weak

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Nightbooks: We Need More Of Krysten Ritter In This Role

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A young boy, Winslow Fegley, obsessed with all things horror is kidnapped by an evil witch, Krysten Ritter, and forced to write her scary stories.

I enjoyed this film quite a lot, it turned out to be much more narly and hardcore than I was expecting it to be, and it managed to create some great horror visuals over the course of its runtime. In some ways this was more scary than a lot of the adult horrors out there.

The best thing about this film is easily the performance given by Ritter. By now you should all know that Ritter is an incredible talent, but if you didn’t know it for some reason this film proves it to you. She manages to pull off so many different emotions with just her face alone without even the need for words. She captures comedy, sadness and intense anger and rage completely, and manages to make her character both sympathetic and loathsome.

Even the child actors were fairly good, that in and off itself is a big deal as child actors are never good.

Overall, a lot of fun.

Pros.

Ritter

The scares

The ending

The characters

Cons.

The Hansel and Gretel twist was a bit too obvious

The Obscure Life Of The Grand Duke Of Corsica: Madness Made Manifest

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

An off kilter architect, Timothy Spall, begins working for an eccentric rich man, Peter Stormare, who calls himself The Grand Duke of Corsica.

I enjoyed this film far more than I thought I was going to. Yes, there are moments of abstractness that are so seemingly random and out of place that they don’t fit into the sequence, which becomes jarring, but on the whole the strangeness of the film really works and helps it to become something truly unique.

Both Spall and Stormare bring their A game thought I would say Stormare slightly pips it. Both men bring a lot of depth and nuance to their characters and explore them in interesting ways that makes you question your preconceived notions.

The flashback subplot, or was it a film, didn’t really work for me. I understand the parallel they were trying to create but there was not enough connective tissue there to really bring it together into a meaningful whole.

Overall, an interesting strange film that for the most part gets it right, though it does cross the line a few times.

Pros.
Spall

Stormare

The strangeness

The ending

Cons.

The flashback subplot

Occasionally the film felt like it was being strange for the sake of it

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American Horror Story: Winter Kills

1.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The vampire like monsters finally meet their comeuppance and the black pills go nationwide.

Why? Why do you kill off your most interesting characters, Belle, Frances Conroy, and Austin, Evan Peters, within the first half of the episode without even giving them one strong final scene? Moreover, why do you keep the boring and unlikable characters alive? It makes no sense. If it was not for Leslie Grossman I would have just turned this episode off.

This program doesn’t even feel like AHS anymore, it feels like a poor imitation. Where once the show had strong writing that all fit together nicely and worked to enrich the whole now we are given plot holes and throw away characters just for the sake of it.

It becomes strikingly apparent during the second half of the episode that other than Grossman none of the actors playing the characters left alive can really act and their wooden performances become all the more glaring thanks to extra screen time. In that vein, the child actor playing Alma is shockingly bad in her performance and becomes almost cartoonishly evil by the end of the episode in a scene that is more than a little bit dumb.

Overall, this first half of the season was a train wreck that has forever tarnished AHS.

Pros.

Grossman

A few interesting scenes

Cons.

The performances aren’t good

The child actor

The ending

It taints the legacy of the show

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What If: Ultron Won?

4.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Ultron, voiced by Ross Marquand, is not defeated and has achieved his aim in removing life from the universe, now he has his sights set on the multiverse.

This was what I wanted from What If right from the beginning. Finally, after almost the entire season the show gets me to stand up and take notice. Why? Well for two important reasons. Firstly, this episode fixed one of my biggest issues with the show as a whole namely that Uatu, voiced by Jeffery Wright, is barely a character and has no purpose beyond reading out exposition. Here he had a central role, and we explored his character further. Secondly, this episode also bucks the trend of keeping things self-contained and brings in characters from other episodes.

I am very excited to see where the show can go from here because with it now becoming a whole narrative rather than separate individual tales it means we could see a new team arise in the final episode, a defenders of the multiverse perhaps; that will of course carry over to live action.

Furthermore, I think this episode does justice to Ultron. The threat is very present here and Ultron becomes a rival to Uatu himself which highlights just how powerful and intriguing the character can be when Joss Whedon is not writing him.

Overall, a stellar episode and one which has me excited for what is to come next week.

Pros.

Getting Ultron right

Having characters crossover

The ending

Giving Uatu focus and exploration

A strong sense of threat

Cons.

The human story was less interesting and felt like a distraction

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Best Sellers: Urinating On Books, The Hallmark Of A Good Writer

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A publishing house on the edge of ruin finds solace in an anarchistic old writer, Michael Cain, can his new book be the thing to save them?

I find this film has moments of heart and genuine emotion but then it pushes too far into oversentimental territory. When the film becomes overly sentimental the problems with the script become increasingly apparent to a point where it almost feels emotionally manipulative.

However, the film does have its moments and I think Caine does a very good job here, his character is layered and multifaceted and grows on you over the course of the film. He has a good amount of on screen chemistry with Aubrey Plaza’s character and the two have excellent rapport. Plaza is as always very good; she does a lot with the little she is given, and she makes for a very relatable and likeable lead.

Overall, though this film wanders into the realm of the cliched and overly sentimental it still has enough heart and warmth to keep it on track.

Pros.

Plaza

Caine

The emotion for the most part

Cons.

The over sentimentality

A weak script

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