My Favourite Films: You’re Next

In this new series of pieces, I want to tell you about some of my favourite films and why I love them, hopefully with the aim of convincing you to give them a try if you haven’t already; today I am going to talk about You’re Next.

You’re Next is a black comedy horror film directed by Adam Wingard. The plot centres around a family gathering that goes to hell when a group of masked, armed assailants, try to break in and kill everyone. There are plenty of twists and turns along the way that keep you guessing until the very last minute.

The easiest way I could define this film for you would be to say it is a smart slasher film. By that I mean it is self-aware as well as written in a smart way, You’re Next is keenly aware of how slasher films go, and it plays off that. By having Erin (Sharni Vinson), not be the typical final girl it makes the film far more interesting. When I say she isn’t the typical final girl what I mean is that she doesn’t spend the first 45 minutes of the film scared out of her mind, right from the off she takes charge of the situation and leads the fight back.

Therein lies another thing I like about this film. Many times, I have been watching slasher films and I have asked myself why do the victims never fight back? Or why do they wait until the last 20 minutes of the film to do something? This film bucks the trend of the killer hunting down the victims and killing them for the first 2 acts of the film, only to have the final girl turn the table on them in the 3^rd act and it presents the struggle between Erin and the masked men as far more even; far more war like. As the masked men kill the people around her, she kills them.

What’s more, there is some fantastic gore in this film that is wince inducing. There is a larger scale version of the nail scene from A Quiet Place, years before it I might add, as well as a grisly scene with a blender which I will leave up to your imagination. The level of violence feels just right for the tone of the film and its black comedy sensibilities, never feeling unnecessary, or unpleasant.

Overall, this is a fantastic film, that when under watched and underappreciated when it came out, it is probably my favourite slasher film ever and I think that it deserves to be seen as it does something fresh and smart with the genre.

Written by Luke

V.F.W: Beer,Brawn And Blasting

V.F.W is an action horror film directed by Joe Begos. The plot revolves around a group of ex-soldiers lead by Fred (Stephen Lang), who must defend their V.F.W outpost against a deranged drug lord and this army of junkie minions; fighting to see the light of a new day.

In terms of being an action movie, this is on par with Guns Akimbo for being my favourite of the year so far. This is very reminiscent of pulpy, grindhouse esque B movies of old, there is a focus on over the top gore and a lot of punk wardrobe choices. I’ve heard this film compared to the Expendables, but really that couldn’t be more of a disservice to the film. V.F.W actually has characters you care about and heart and soul, rather than just being a nostalgia vehicle to give old action stars the chance to meet up once again and get a nice fat paycheck.

Moreover, Stephen Lang is a far better action hero here, that Stallone was in the Expendables, you buy him as this solider that never really came home, never really wanted to; he lives to fight. We see this juxtaposed by the fact that he is getting old and his body won’t really let him fight, like it did when he was a young man, anymore and you can see that on screen: just in the little details. I think the paradigm of a solider who likes being a solider, but who physically can’t be anymore, is a neat angle to explore with this character and it helps Fred to feel well rounded and nuanced, rather than just another action hero.

The gore in this film is also brutally bloody in the best way, right from the off we see a man’s head explode from a shot gun blast and that sets the tone for what is to follow. I think good gore can really add to a horror film, good gore is usually comic and deliberately over the top: not the kind of gore you get out of something like Hostel where it get uncomfortable to watch after a while, but that is my own personal taste.

Overall, this is ridiculous, over the top, bloody fun and I can’t recommend it enough if that is your kind of thing. Lang is great and the film is a thrill ride from start to finish. A must watch!

Pros.

Stephen Lang.

A better version of the Expendables.

The over the top gore.

The dumb fun of it all.

Characters you genuinely want to see survive until the end.

Cons.

None

5/5

Reviewed By Luke

Prevenge: The Mother-Child Bond

Prevenge is a British comedy slasher film directed by Alice Lowe. The plot revolves around a grieving pregnant woman, who is commanded to kill by her unborn baby; all of the people she kills are related to the very recent death of her husband and the child’s father in one way or another. The film has a lot to say about motherhood and the act of being pregnant, using the over the top premise to take a deeper look at the actual notion of having a child and the mother child-bond.

In many ways this film could be a spiritual sequel to Ben Wheatly’s film, also staring Alice Lowe, Sightseers, the two films are very similar in a lot of ways, including having a very similar sensibility around murder and death, treating it as a darkly comic thing. I think the two films would make for a very interesting double feature.

That said let’s get into the review.

Did I enjoy this film? That is a hard question to answer, there is a lot going on and a lot to unpack, so it might not be as simple as that. I think this film raises a lot of interesting questions about how we as a society view pregnant women and how far we should go for our children; as this film takes that to an extreme. Furthermore, the ending of the film when Ruth (Alice Lowe) realises that her unborn child wasn’t the thing telling her to kill all along, and that it was her, is very interesting because it leaves us with the question of how is she going to deal with that?

The scares are also very good in this film, it is certainly more of a dark comedy than a horror, but whenever we have a moment where ‘the child’ is talking to her’, it makes the hairs stand-up on the back of your neck. We also get a lot of good gore from some of the kills, so gore fans will find something to enjoy.

The issue with this film for me, is that fact that it is very slow, there are a lot of scenes that feel longer than she should be. Said scenes are probably going for a meditative feeling, but instead they just feel a little pretentious. What’s more Prevenge is a very oppressive film to watch, it is bleak very bleak; there are moments of dark comedy mixed in, but these are few and far between; for the most part it is very hard to watch.

Overall, this is a very interesting and unique film, but it is undeniably niche, this certainly isn’t going to everyone’s taste.

Pros.

Unique.

Novel approach.

Good scares and gore.

Cons.

It’s hard to watch.

It does feel a bit pretentious at times.

2.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Pet Sematary: Sometimes Dead Is Better.

Pet Sematary is a supernatural horror film directed by Kevin Kolsch; based on the Stephen King novel of the same name. The film revolves around a family that finds a graveyard behind their house, that allows things to come back from the dead, this could be animals, or it could be people, but when they come back, they come back changed.

First things first, I just need to say I had very high expectations when I went in to see this film, as I love the work of Stephen King, as well as the 1980 version of this film. As a result of that I was disappointed with it and thought that while the new version did have a few cool scenes, it wasn’t a patch on the original film.

For me the issues began with the casting of Jason Clarke as Louis Reed. I don’t like Clarke and I certainly don’t rate him as an actor. I don’t know if I just haven’t seen him in the right role, but it seems like whenever he turns up in a film, that film turns out to be bad; the list of films that prove this point is long, but some choice examples are Winchester, Terminator Genesis and Serenity, however he is the best of a bad bunch.

This film has John Lithgow in it, he plays the neighbour that tells Louis about the pet semetary in the first place, Lithgow does the best with what little he has, but he is truly wasted in this film and his best scene is a scene that involves a child slashing the tendons in the base of his leg. What a waste.

The horror of this film is also not as well done as the 80’s version. Yes, that film was campy and a bit silly, but the scenes of the sister who is bed-bound in the attic, were genuinely frightening and left an impact. However, those same scenes in the 2019 version lose a lot of there impact thanks to an over-reliance on jump scares. I have talked at length about the plague that is jump scares, so I won’t go on about it here.

Finally, and perhaps worst of all we have the ending, which is significantly different from the book and the 1980 film, this time we see that the whole family has become evil thanks to the semetary and is going to kill baby Gage and that is how the film ends, so effectively the bad guys win. This could be done in such a way where it felt natural and earned, it is not inherently a bad thing. However, the way this ending is presented to us, leaves us feeling unsatisfied and let down; which then leaves a sour taste in the mouth when thinking about this film.

Overall, yet another remake that never needed to be made, disappointing, dumb and downright boring at times, don’t waste your money, watch it on TV, or stream it on Netflix.

Pros.

John Lithgow tries.

The classic song is back, even if it is a cover.

Cons.

Stop casting Jason Clarke!

The jump scares.

The lack of anything new or interesting.

2.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

The Invisible Man: The Dark Universe Reborn.

The Invisible Man is a science fiction horror film directed by Leigh Whannell. The plot follows Cecilia (Elizabeth Moss), a woman who escapes her abusive boyfriend, only for him to then kill himself, or appear to, and then continue stalking her only now he is invisible. Of course, people think that Cecilia is crazy, so she must set out on a mission to prove she is sane, as well as to finish off her abusive ex-boyfriend once and for all.

I thought this was a great film. After the rocky start Universal’s Dark Universe had all hope seemed to be lost, but then this came out. The reason why I think this film is so good and should be the template for future releases of Universal’s classic monster films, is because it is a horror film first. It is not an action film with horror elements, it is not a film hell bent of trying to force in an extended universe, it is simply a good horror film.

To that end, I found the premise to be quite unsettling, being stalked by someone you can’t see, and the film really does explore that in an interesting way. Furthermore, there were moments in the film where I thought for sure they would stuff in a cheap jump scare, but they didn’t and for that I tip my hat to Leigh Whannell. The horror elements in this film are strong, there were multiple times in the film that made me jump, which is something I rarely do these days as I have become use to watching horror films.

Moreover, I think the way the film handles domestic abuse is both in good taste and shocking at the same time, the domestic abuse is the heart of this film, therein lies the horror, The Invisible Man shines a light on this subject and shows how horrific it is, how a person can be isolated and tortured by the person they love the most. What’s more, Elizabeth Moss’s performance highlights the horror of domestic abuse as her character is unable to go outside at the start of the film as she is consumed by fear that her partner will be outside coming for her. For me this may be a career best for Moss.

Overall, this film far exceeded by expectations, as a stand-alone horror film it works very well, as a piece of a larger narrative equally so, other than being a little slow at times, this is a damn near perfect film.

Pros.

The horror.

Not using jump scares.

It actually made me jump.

Elizabeth Moss.

Con.

It is a bit slow at times, it could have done with a tighter edit.

4.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Halloween (2018): Back In The Game

Halloween (2018) is a horror slasher film directed by David Gordon Green. This film acts as a soft reboot of the franchise, ignoring everything after the first John Carpenter Halloween film. The plot once again sees everyone’s favourite maniac breakout of the asylum and return to Haddonfield, to carry on his killing spree that he began 40 years ago. However, a face from his past has been waiting for him, Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis). Laurie is now battle hardened and suffering from PTSD, her whole life has been dedicated to finishing Michael off when he inevitably returns.

This film is a return to form for the franchise, by ignoring all of the terrible sequels, and doing away with the convoluted backstory for Michael Myers, the film returns to its root and is all the scarier for it. The idea that Strode has not been able to move on after what happened to her all those years ago and has now become obsessed, not only makes sense, but is also a really interesting concept.

Despite now being an old man, in the film’s timeline, Michael Myers has some genuinely great scares, he is still the killing machine we all remember him to be. When he drops the handful of teeth over the toilet stall wall, that stayed with me long after I saw it. My one issue with how this film handles Michael Myers is the fake out when it looks like someone else is going to take over the mantle; lucky they get their face stood on by the man himself.

The whole film builds towards the showdown between Myers and Strode and it is safe to say that the final showdown is fantastically well done. It is tense and suspenseful, and you can tell that both parties are giving it their all and that this is the defining moment in their lives. It is nice to see three generations of Strode women fighting back again this man that has been terrorising their family for almost half a century. The final shot of the film seeing Michael Myers trapped in a house that is burning down and it finally looks as though this is the end for him, but of course with this being a slasher film it can’t be, and two more films have been announced.

Overall, after all the harm that had been done to the franchise over the years, it is nice to see a Halloween film that actually cares about the characters that John Carpenter created back in 1978. I loved the Rob Zombie films, but this is definitely a return to form for the series. I can’t wait for Halloween Kills, but at the same time I would like to see the series end.

Pros.

A great return to form.

Michael Myers is still scary.

The PTSD angle is a cool way to take it.

The final showdown is great.

Cons.

It should be the end.

4/5

Reviewed by Luke

The Curse Of La Llorona: Behold The Horror!

The Curse Of La Llorona is a supernatural horror film directed by Michael Chaves and is the 6^th instalment in the Conjuring universe, though that fact is not marketed, for what reason you decide. The plot revolves around social worker Anna (Linda Cardellini), who after unwittingly letting a supernatural entity kill two kids, now has to face down the same entity, La Llorona (Marisol Ramirez), when her own kids become targets.

I am just going to say this once, the only reason this is a part of the Conjuring universe is because Warner Brothers know that without that title this film would flop, hard. What makes it even worse is the fact that its tie to said universe is so small and flimsy, most people won’t even recognise it. The way this film ties into the shared universe is by having the same actor who played a priest in the first Annabelle film return to his role for a blink and you will miss it cameo.

I understand that the folk tale of La Llorona is something that means a lot to people and that it was THE fear of their childhood, but that just makes this film sadder. Rather than give us a good film that explores La Llorona, the myth, the person, we have this forgettable bland excuse for a film. La Llorona could be swapped for any of the Conjuring universe baddies and the results would be the same. La Llorona in this film could easily be the nun from other entries, as they don’t bother to make her feel unique and different.

Moreover, the characters in this film are as dull and cliché filled as they can possibly be, these are characters that you have seen thousands of times before in this kind of film there is nothing to them and that makes them incredibly hard to care for. There were moments in this film when I was hoping La Llorona would kill one of them just to liven things up, but no. It is all just predictable and safe.

Don’t even get me started on the jump scares in this film, they are the most blatant and obvious ones I have ever seem in a film. Never has it been truer than in the case of this film where the creative team are putting in forced jump scares because there is no actually horror in their horror film. This is so un-scary it doesn’t deserve to be called a horror film, it could be shown in schools and even then, little kids wouldn’t find it scary, just tediously, aggressively, horrifically bad.

Pros.

The new priest guy is kind of cool.

Cons.

Oh, wait no they ruined him.

La Llorona herself is dull and repetitive.

It shows everything wrong with jump scares.

It is not in any way, in any shape or form a horror film.

0.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

My Favourite Films: It Follows

In this new series of pieces, I want to tell you about some of my favourite films and why I love them, hopefully with the aim of convincing you to give them a try if you haven’t already; first up is It Follows

It Follows is a supernatural physiological horror film directed by David Robert Marshall. The plot revolves around a curse that is being passed around through sex. When a person is infected with it an unknown entity will slowly follow them around wherever they go, getting closer and closer, this entity can take the form of anyone, someone you know and trust, or a stranger, but its goal remains the same when it catches up to you it will kill you and then move on to the next person down the line. We see this play out from the point of view of our protagonist Jay (Maika Monroe), who becomes infected with the curse and then has to do battle with the entity.

The reason why this film is so good is the inherent tension in the premise, a pretty much unstoppable creature is coming for you slowly, it never sleeps, never takes a break it is always getting closer and closer, it’s a terrifying idea to ponder. It Follows really dives into this sense of dread as well as we see Jay slowly losing her mind more and more as her battle becomes more and more futile. This film also asks some really riveting moral questions as well, posing is it better to just pass it on to someone else because then at least it will leave you alone until it kills the person you spread it to.

Another feather in It Follows cap is its beautifully done and implemented synth soundtrack, it has just enough 80’s esque charm to feel familiar, whilst also enough haunting emptiness to perfectly underpin the tone of the film as the non-diegetic music works perfectly as a mirror to the on-screen characters emotions.

One of the main reasons I love this film so much is because it relies on creating a tense atmosphere and a looming sense of dread to generate scares, rather than having a jump scares ever few minutes. I personally believe that It Follows approach to horror works better than something that features a lot of jump scares for the simple fact that jump scares are easy to spot and become predictable after a bit, whereas It Follows had me feeling uneasy throughout.

Written by Luke

The Mummy: One Of The Worst Films Ever Made!

The Mummy is an action adventure film, directed by the talentless hack Alex Kurtzman. The plot of this film revolved around Nick Morton (Tom Cruise), a solider who whilst on a mission in Egypt accidentally unleashes an ancient evil into the world. This was originally supposed to be the film that kick-started Universal’s Dark Universe, instead it was the film that ended up killing it.

First off, the abandoning of the horror roots of The Mummy series is a crime, but then replacing them with samey over the top generic action sequences is a crime against humanity. Whoever came up with the idea to turn The Mummy into an entirely action driven film deserves to be fired and never allowed to work in Hollywood again. Yes, I know the Brenden Frasier films exist, and yes, they were action focused as well, but there was also some horror in those films, there were many scenes that genuinely scared me the first time I saw them.

What makes this worse is the fact that they cast Tom Cruise in the lead role, he is horribly miscast and also brings no charm whatsoever to the film, he just plays a generic action hero type. The end of film sees him possessed by some kind of demonic force, yet he is still a good guy and the film still wants us to root for him. The film wants you to root for the devil, where was the moral outcry about that?

The supporting cast are all terrible, but for different reasons include some that aren’t their fault. Sofia Boutella as The Mummy does bring a great physicality to the role and she as a character is intriguing, however to the film’s bad luck, Suicide Squad was fresh in people’s minds as Boutella’s Mummy seemed all too familiar to the villain of that film. Also, the over reliance on CGI really shows with her character and the film could have been improved with more practical effects. Annabelle Wallis as the love interest (because that is all her character is), has absolutely nothing to do except be saved by Tom Cruise. It has to be said as well though that Wallis can’t act, she just can’t, wooden would be too nice of a word to describe her acting ability, her involvement in any film should be a huge red flag. Finally, we have Jake Johnson as the comedic sidekick character, who I actually liked, I thought he was funny, and I enjoyed what they did with his character. However, because this film was so poorly made his comedy stuck out like a sore thumb and didn’t mesh well with the overall tone of the film.

Overall, Jake Johnson is the best thing about this film, his character might be on screen for all of 20 minutes but hell you will miss him when he isn’t there. Tom Cruise is terrible, just terrible. This film deserves to rot in hell.

Pros.

Jake Johnson.

Cons.

Alex Kurtzman is a hack.

They ruined a great franchise.

Tom Cruise.

This film hates itself and the audience.

1/5

Reviewed by Luke

What Makes A Final Girl?

I am a huge fan of the horror genre and what I want to talk about today is pivotal to it, I am going to talk about the trope of ‘the final girl’.

The Slasher genre is an important sub-genre of horror itself. The Slasher genre was at its peak in the 1980’s and the early- to mid-1990’s, it was in this period we got things like Friday The 13^th, Halloween, Scream and A Nightmare on Elm Street. The basic premise of these films is the same whichever you look at, evil killer, sometimes supernatural sometimes not, hunting down and killing a group of teens, with one surviving at the end to fight the killer and win. This is ‘the final girl’.

Many different actresses over the years have put their own spin on ‘the final girl’, we’ve had Sidney Prescott (Neve Campbell), Nancy (Heather Langenkamp), Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) and Alice (Adrienne King). All of these characters and performances aren’t exactly the same, they would be boring if they were, but they do all share certain qualities and it is these qualities that I want to look at it in further detail.

Not just anyone can be a ‘final girl’, usually to be one you have to be pure (a virgin), have suffered some kind of past trauma, be of good moral character etc. That is a very specific set of characteristics. With these slasher films a very conservative life message was being spread around subtly, sex kills, if you engage in any kind of sexual activity the killer will get you and it isn’t just sex if you behave in anyway in these films that isn’t morally to the rigid standard of the time you would be cut down as well.

Were these films trying to make a point out of the moral purity of society at the time? Was it done with comical intent? We don’t know really is the answer to those questions, so by today’s standard the idea of a ‘final girl’ is quiet an antiquated concept. The stigma on sex isn’t as strong as it was back then, the older generation is more relaxed about these things as they grew up during times like the summer of love and so it isn’t the same.

Can there still be a ‘final girl’ in a 2020 film? Yes of course there can, but it would serve the film better if the more puritanical moral message behind the trope was left in the sands of time.

Written by Luke