The Boss: The Peak Of McCarthy’s Humour

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

There seems to be noting worse in modern cinema than a film directed by Ben Falcone and starring his wife Melissa McCarthy. This film proves this rule to be true and is every bit as terrible as you would expect it to be.

Melissa McCarthy is not funny; I feel like collectively we as humans know this and yet these films keep getting made. There is only so many fat jokes she can make before you’re pleading for the film to be turned off, really it is quite depressing that McCarthy has to degrade herself like this for a laugh. Watching her falling over isn’t funny, it just isn’t.

Moreover, the film’s sense of humour marches into the camp of annoying very early on and it never leaves. This film runs all of it’s ‘jokes’ into the ground by recycling them over and over again, most likely because they are too lazy to come up with anymore.

It is sad to see Kristen Bell and Peter Dinklage here as they deserve so much better than this.

Overall, this film should really be avoided at all costs and there should be some sort of legal agreement that McCarthy and her Husband won’t make films together anymore.

Pros.

If you turn it off and put something else on it really isn’t that bad

Cons.

McCarthy

The jokes

It wastes its supporting cast

It is repetitive

It is dull

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Kimi: All The Different Hair Colours Can’t Distract From The Blatant Plagiarism

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

An agoraphobic tech worker, played by Zoe Kravitz, discovers a murder and becomes tangled up in the latest blatant copy of Rear Window.

If I had to describe this film in a sentence it would be a rehash of Rear Window told through the lens of something like The Woman In The Window, which is also incredibly similar to Rear Window, mixed with a dash of covid to date it immediately.

In that vein, I have written before about how I think it is far too early for films about covid, it is still on going and is still very raw for a lot of people, as such seeing it in films is off putting. People go to the cinema to escape the world around them not to just live it through someone else’s eyes.

A lot of the praise for this film is being heaped on Kravitz, somewhat unduly I would say. Kravitz is fine don’t get me wrong, but I wouldn’t say this is an awards worthy performance or even her best. Though that is not necessarily Kravitz fault as the character she is playing is a cliché through and through.

Overall, this one really did little for me, it was far too familiar.

Pros.

It was short

It was watchable

Cons.

It feels too familiar

Keep covid out of films

Kravitz’s character is a cliché

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Evil Dead 2: Beware The Evil Hand At Work

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Ash, played by Bruce Campbell, once again runs afoul of the Book of the Dead.

For the most part I thought this was more of the same, in a good way. However, I didn’t like that this film went even further with the jarring and out of place claymation. It felt to me like Raimi was going a little wild on his first proper big budget, as a lot of the time these claymation elements added little to the film overall.

Furthermore, I also thought the narrative of the film suffered some issues as it makes no sense that Ash would bring a date back to the Cabin wherein he had lost all of his friends, or that he would hit play once again on the tape which releases the demonic spirits. I had to look up what was going on as I was honestly baffled by it and still don’t really understand why it went that way.

That said however, I thought the film was still a lot of fun. It managed to balance its horror and its humour well and deliver on each in equal measure, I would say the first film was slightly more funny but that is just my specific taste.

Additionally, Campbell is still a lot of fun to watch on-screen. If anything he takes the wackiness up a notch in his performance and executes a wonderful sense of mania.

Overall, in many ways more of the good stuff, but a few issues are becoming apparent.

Pros.

The wackiness

Campbell

The gore

The humour and the scares

Cons.

Too much claymation

Plot issues

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Battleship: Rihanna Won’t Be Winning An Oscar Any Time Soon.

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Aliens invade and of course it is down to the US Navy to save us all.

I will give this film props for actually making a full fledge film out of a board game, though the story is nothing new or novel it is serviceable and it gives me hope for future films being based on boardgames, of which there are many.

Moreover, this film features one of my favourite actors Taylor Kitsch, who has never been given the recognition he deserves which is a shame as he is genuinely good a lot of the time. Here is no exception, Kitsch brings a lot of energy to the part and perfectly captures the everyman hero vibe.

Sadly, that is were the praise ends. For the most part the wider supporting cast is wasted and reduced to stereotypes, however that is not the case for Rihanna’s Cora Raikes, who is featured prominently especially towards the end of the film, by the end of it you realise what a mistake that is as Rihanna is a very poor actor. To me this just felt like an ego trip for Rihanna, she wanted to be an actor so her star-power bought her a role, this is a shame as a less famous but much more talented actor could have done a lot with the part.

Furthermore, the aliens themselves look awful. The CGI is not just bad but also overused resulting in a horrifying and upsetting spectacle.

Overall, Kitsch is good and there is some fun to be had but really there was no need to make a film based on the boardgame Battleship and this film proves that.

Pros.

Kitsch

Some fun to be had

Cons.

Rihanna

The aliens

It is generic and dull

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Texas Chainsaw Massacre: Killing Old Women Through The Power Of Social Justice

1.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Hollywood just can’t seem to let a franchise die and as such we get this.

Before watching I had heard bad things about this film, but it managed to exceed my negative expectations.

Firstly, the characters are all annoying as hell, they are clearly a caricature of the young social justice crowd judging everyone and act as though everyone who is not as comfortably suburban and middle class as them is a racist bumpkin. Honestly, if I were a southern American person I would find this film offensive.

Adding to this the film decides it is going to rip off the plot of the rebooted Halloween from a few years back and brings back the series original final girl, played by Olwen Fouere, for a fight with big bad Leatherface, played by Mark Burnham. There is no point in doing this as not only is it blatant plagiarism, but also the actor who played the final girl in every other one of her appearances is dead, so without looking it up you don’t know who Fouere is supposed to be.

The only good aspect of this film is that they don’t hold back on the gore and Leatherface is able to run wild, as such we get quite a few nice gnarly images with good effects work.

Overall, the forced social commentary nearly kills the film straight off, but then when it decides to rip off its better you know The Texas Chainsaw Massacre franchise is officially dead.

Pros.

The gore

A few unintentional laughs

Cons.

The social commentary

The deeply unlikeable characters

Ripping off Halloween

The ending

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The Evil Dead: Is It Still Groovy?

4.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A group of young people go up to a cabin in the woods and boom a cult classic is born.

This is my first time watching The Evil Dead in a long time and I have to say it really holds up.

Part of what works so well about this film is that it nails the balance between comedy and horror splendidly, there are both laughs and scares to be had but neither comes at the expense of the other. Also there was an uncanniness to the dark humour a lot of the time that really served to mine the middle ground between the two aspects of the film.

The whole cast were good; however Bruce Campbell stole the show entirely. Obviously Campbell’s Ash is the main character for the franchise so it might be hard for him to steal scenes that are already given to him, but what I mean is that his performance is so instantly iconic that it is hard not to leave the film talking about him. His facial acting is off the charts and he manages to court both the everyman and the superhero like appeal.

My only criticism of the film would be that some of the claymation stuff towards the end of the film comes off as a little jarring. Yes, I know this film was made on a budget and is several decades old, but still when I saw the tongue of the Book of The Dead at the end it almost felt silly: luckily these sort of effects were only used sparingly.

Overall, a cult classic that still holds up.

Pros.

Campbell

The scares

The laughs

Nailing the tone

The makeup effects

Cons.

The stop-motion effects didn’t work for me

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Wanderlust: Aren’t Hippies Weird, Regressing Through Time

1.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Two, questionably, young go getters, played by Paul Rudd and Jennifer Anniston lose everything in the 2008 economic crisis and so decide to go and join a commune.

I understand that the rom-com genre is not really a place of originality but come on, I have seen this same film so many times before. It is a very predictable run away from your problems and join the circus sort of narrative structure and everything progresses in the way you would expect it to with little to no surprises.

Moreover, the way this film presents communes and those who dwell within them could be ripped straight out of a book of cliches as of course they are all wacky, have issues with boundaries and are into sleeping around. The last point I thought felt really forced into the narrative and when Anniston’s character does decide she wants to cheat on her husband it comes out of nowhere and doesn’t make sense from a character perspective.

The humour and the heart were all very genre standard neither particularly affected me in anyway.

Overall, yet another forgettable rom-com.

Pros.

Rudd has fun with it

It is watchable

Cons.

Reducing communes to a stereotype

The free love plot point

It was generic

It was too familiar

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Marry Me: Literally Saying Yes To The First Guy You See

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A singer, played by Jennifer Lopez, finds out on stage that she has been cheated on so agrees to marry a random guy, played by Owen Wilson, in the crowd. Rom-com plot beats ensue.

Both Lopez and Wilson are likeable actor so really this one should have been a slam dunk but there is just something about their relationship here that doesn’t work. Mainly this is down to chemistry and the fact the two of them don’t seem to have it at all and as a result you don’t buy their romance.

Moreover, when the film aims for heart and emotional resonance it often instead comes off as overly sentimental and more than a little cliché. The drama of the film reflects this and feels needlessly drawn out and over the top for the sake of it. The writers of this film were trying too hard.

In that vein narratively this film is deeply uninspired and comes off as feeling predictable and played out right from the start, you know the beats of this film as you have seen them in other, better, features.

Overall, fine but nothing more.

Pros.

The actors are both charming

The film is unintentionally hilarious

It is watchable

Cons.

The actors have no chemistry together

The film has strong pacing issues

It is cliché and predictable

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What Happens In Vegas: Just When You Think The Rom-Com Can’t Sink Any Lower

1/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Two deeply unlikeable characters, played by Cameron Diaz and Ashton Kutcher, unwittingly get married in Las Vegas and then have to stay together for legal and financial reasons.

There are moments where this film is just straight up sexist and homophobic in its humour, and I get that it did not come out in the socially charged times of the current year, but did anyone ever think this was okay? Every time the film makes one of these jokes I either cringe or think what was the point? Do they just have to use slurs and stereotypes to try and be funny because they have nothing else?

In terms of laughs, yeah this film doesn’t have any. I chuckled a few times but it was not deliberate on the part of the film.

In terms of plot this film is incredibly generic and predictable, you know where this is going right from the start and rather than try and surprise you it just goes there. Every cliché and trope of the genre is trotted out here in a vein effort to drown you in a sea of mediocrity.

Neither Diaz nor Kutcher are likeable here and both come off as varying degrees of annoying, self-involved and obnoxious.

Overall, this really is the bottom of the barrel for the rom-com genre.

Pros.

It is watchable

Cons.

Diaz and Kutcher are both annoying

It is vapid and generic

It is toxic

The relationship doesn’t feel believable

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Death On The Nile: Cancel The Gal Gadot Cleopatra Film Right Now

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Hercule Poirot, played by Kenneth Branagh, is back and this time he is trying to solve a murder that takes place on a steamboat.

To address the elephant in the room first, obviously it is unfortunate that this film features alleged cannibal sexual predator Armie Harmer in such a large role, but it is what it is and they filmed it before the allegations came to light so for the most part I just tried to ignore it.

This was a mixed bag of a film. To the film’s strength it boasts a terrific performance from director/ star Branagh who really taps into the emotion of the character and gives us a peak behind the curtain in a way the first film never did, the latter stages of the film really highlight this. Moreover, newcomer Emma Mackey is also terrific and steals a lot of the scenes she appears in.

However, to its detriment the pacing is awful and it feels like the film has been on for hours before the plot-forwarding murder even happens. This is a result of the first act dragging horribly, it is also wildly inaccurate to the time period with music and dancing that belongs in a different era entirely, Branagh seems to be growing bored with the period setting here.

Worse yet, the film features some incredibly on the nose product placement for Tiffanies, perhaps on the same level as Crispy Kreme in the Power Rangers film everyone has forgotten about now.

The worst thing about this film is Gal Gadot. I have defended Gadot against a lot of in my opinion unfair criticism, I think she makes a fine Wonder Woman, however here her serious lack of acting chops really shows, as she is unable to do any accent other than her own, or emote, basic stuff. When she is finally removed from play, midway into the film, you are grateful as she was quite clearly miscast.

Overall, a fun if flawed second film.

Pros.

Branagh as Poirot

Mackey

The mystery

Cons.

The pacing made worse by the awful first act

Gadot

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