Luck: Mindless Slop That Isn’t Worth Your Kids Time

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Unlucky Sam, voiced by Eva Nobelzada, discovers the world of luck.

I have written before about the fact that often animated films aimed at families and children don’t feel the need to try to be good or to match the standards that people would expect from films with the idea that children will eat up any old slop, and this really does embody that idea.

In many ways this film feels dead behind the eyes and truly soulless, there is nothing of meaningful substance here, instead it just went through the motions and churned out tired fantasy tropes that we have seen again and again. They also force in some songs for who knows what reason, probably because a focus group recommended it, and in these song and dance numbers we get another good luck at again studio executives trying to pander to the youth of today in the most cringe way.

I think the vocal performances across the board were nearly consistently terrible, with Nobezada sound bored and asleep at the wheel with the line delivery of low battery robot and Simon Pegg doing his best Mike Myers as Shrek impression. I am a huge fan of Pegg as an actor but I question why he was cast here, he really doesn’t bring much to the film and someone possessing a real Scottish accent who is also a talented voice actor say someone like James McAvoy could have done a much better job of it.

Overall, don’t subject your kids to this, they won’t look at you the same way afterwards.

Pros.

It is pretty bad but it is not unwatchable or offensive

Cons.

Nobelzada

Pegg

The story is stupid and contrived

The songs

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DC League Of Super-Pets: The Horniest Turtle You Will Ever Meet

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Krypto, voiced by Dwayne Johnson and a rag tag group of other pets must come together to save the Justice League after they are bested by Lex Luthor’s Guinea Pig, voiced by Kate McKinnon.

I think this film is very watchable and has a lot of good elements within it, do I think this film is going to set the world on fire? No, obviously not, but I think there are worse ways to spend a few hours.

With the exception of one character that I will get to later, most of the characters are fairly one note of forgettable, and their respective voice actors don’t do all that much to liven up proceedings. Natasha Lyonne does her best as a horny turtle and lands a few laughs but even she can’t save this film on a performance front. Hell even Keanu Reeves himself, the man who can single-handedly save any movie, as Batman isn’t enough. Those are words I never thought I would have to write.

The one exception to this however is Kevin Hart as Ace. The leader of the stray pack and a dog who was chucked out of his home after saving a little girl from falling down the stairs has a massive amount of depth and heart put into his character and Hart really delivers on a warm and tender yet also funny vocal performance. I think truly that this is Kevin Hart’s film and that he outshines all of his co-stars and forms a soon to be beloved animated character.

I also enjoyed all the reference in this film to other films such as the throwaway Warriors bit. Though most audiences of this film won’t have watched that, I found it to be funny. Moreover, on the whole I found myself laughing quite a few times during this film and do think the humour works quite well.

Overall, a watchable and somewhat entertaining animated film with one really strong character, sadly the rest of the characters aren’t quite on the mark.

Pros.

Hart

It is funny

The references

The ending

Cons.

The voice cast is mostly wasted

It has pacing issues

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South Park Streaming Wars Part 2

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Randy, voiced by Trey Parker, must find the duality within himself in order to save the world from Manbearpig and to finally end the streaming wars.

I think this was better than the last special but still not great. I liked that they acknowledge that the character of Randy has become one note, and frankly annoying, and I was even pleased to see that they were going to change him back to how he used to be before he became the weed guy and was an actual character. However, then the ending comes along as seems to dump all over that idea suggesting that more weed Randy is to come, oh joy.

Moreover, though I liked the meta commentary on streaming wars and Matt Stone and Trey Parker using the special as a means to complain about their own experiences, I think that the formatting of the whole thing was off and that it illustrates perfectly how South Park works far better as a disconnected series, rather than interconnected specials. I would really like them to go back to how the show used to be before they forced in serialisation.

The comedy this time around was also marginally better than in the last special and I found I was laughing more throughout. I am also glad they greatly reduced Cartman’s role down as he was really quite annoying in the previous part of this event, verging on loathsome.

Overall, better than the last Streaming Wars but maybe they should stop with the specials soon as they are becoming long in the tooth.

Pros.

It is funnier

It acknowledges what went wrong with Randy

The characters feel more likeable then they did in the first part

Cons.

The ending and Randy’s future

It would have worked better a one off episode of the series rather than as a big flashy special

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The Sea Beast: An Underwater How To Train Your Dragon

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

In a world of Hunters and Sea Beasts, the two sides finally realise that the real evil in the world are corrupt monarchies that pit them against each other.

I thought that this was one of the best Netflix originals that I have seen in some time. I enjoyed the world and the characters tremendously and thought that it had a lot to say about life and about the current state of our own world. I also enjoyed the fact that every time Karl Urban spoke he reminded me of his character from The Boys, the accents are basically the same, that gave me some happy flashbacks.

The film as a whole has a strong How To Train Your Dragon’s vibe, with some plot elements feeling almost beat for beat the same. However, where in other instances I would lambast this film for its lack of creativity and originality I actually like the elements here on display despite the fact they are so obviously copied over. I thought that the sea beast that we meet are all quite memorable and cute looking; Netflix really should start selling more merch from their films and shows.

My issues with the film mainly come from a pacing perspective as I think this film could do with being about twenty minutes shorter as there is a lot of needless bloat wherein not much happens around the second act, which could be removed to the film’s betterment.

Overall, fun but not perfect.

Pros.

The ending

The sea beasts themselves

It is a lot of fun

Urban

Cons.

The pacing

It is very familiar

It doesn’t service all its characters and a lot of them remain undeveloped

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The Simpsons Movie: The Ending We Deserved?

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Simpson family are forced out of Springfield after seemingly dooming it, however they of course come together to try and save the town.

I remember watching this in the cinema when it first came out and it was a huge deal. I enjoyed it a lot then, but my question was would it hold up now after all these years. In short it does, there are one or two lazy elements here and there but for the most part a lot of what made and makes, yes I like modern Simpsons, so great is fully on display here.

I think the best thing about this film is how far they push the concept. They go all out in a way that they simply couldn’t do on an episode of the show or even in a two-parter, and show us things we have never seen before in the show. When you compare this to other series that have also translated to the big screen like the Bob’s Burgers movie you see the difference between what is theatrical and what isn’t.

Moreover, the Simpson family and their various dynamics are kept at the heart of this film and I truly think that is why it is as good as it is. Rather than try and spread its focus amongst a bunch of supporting character, as newer episodes do, this film keeps the focus on the family and that really helps it to thrive. I particularly think the Homer, voiced by Dan Castellaneta, and Bart, voiced by Nancy Cartwright, storyline is quite interesting as it advances the relationship between the two characters into an area we haven’t seen them before where Bart seemingly truly abandons Homer.

My only real criticism of this film is that the writing is a little obvious and crucially convenient. Whereas early seasons of the show would go out of there way to be clever and even subversive, everything that happens here is incredibly signposted and obvious and as such the surprise is lacking.

Overall, a strong ending for a show that would go on for many more seasons after it.

Pros.

The Homer/Bart storyline

The scope

The comedy

It is very quotable

Cons.

The writing is a little predictable and dumb

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Minions The Rise Of Gru: A Surprising Good Time

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Telling the tale of Gru’s early life, as he tries to become a member of the Vicious Six.

Full disclosure I did not like the first Minions film, so I went into this with incredibly low expectations, but found myself pleasantly surprised. To my shock the film was actually quite funny, it had me laughing on several occasions, and I also thought it was mostly sweet throughout as well, I liked the emotional core of the story.

Moreover, the more gimmicky and irritating elements of Illumination’s style, the dumb jokes and over abuse of license music, didn’t strike me as being so egregious here though they did still show up on occasion.

The minions themselves each had their own moments to shine but I would say the real stand out was Steve Carell’s performance as Gru. Carell really is the heart and soul of this franchise and I would say that without him this film wouldn’t have worked even half as well, I think seeing his character at this younger stage really allows for us to explore a different side to him and see him in a whole new light.

Overall, a welcome treat that is both funny and sweet.

Pros.

Carell

The ending

The minions themselves, especially when they get powered up

The humour and the emotion

Cons.

A few little irritating nostalgia baiting moments

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The Smurfs: Why Sony Pictures Animation Will Never Be Respected

1.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Sony decided to waste some money and bring back the Smurfs.

Where to start with this film. I will admit I went in with low expectations knowing full well that the film would most likely be bad, a Netflix driven act of viewing self-harm, and yet this film was more boring than bad. Truly there isn’t enough here to make it so bad it is good, or even to make it laughably bad. It is just lazy and uninspired.

My biggest question would be if Sony was going to waste the money trying to bring the Smurfs back why not do it well? The animation is some of the worst I have ever seen, worse than a Disney channel original movie, furthermore, I don’t think the poor quality can be blamed on the year this film came out as it was not that long ago: in all honesty I think Sony just went cheap with it.

Next on the agenda, why is Gargamel, played by Hank Azaria, such an incredibly anti-semitic character? Almost everything about the portrayal reeks of old fashioned and frankly dangerous Jewish stereotypes, are we not past that? Honestly how that character in that shape ever made it into the film is baffling.

Finally, Katy Perry isn’t a good voice actor. I didn’t really think that needed saying but hey musicians aren’t always great at everything, even if you cynically throw them into a film during the hight of their popularity to try and boost audience numbers.

Overall, how was this film successful?

Pros.

Neil Patrick Harris is always great

It is watchable if you are prepared to look past the more outdated elements

Cons.

The antisemitism

Perry

The animation is awful

It is incredibly generic

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Lightyear: Back In The 90s This Would Have Been A Good Idea

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The film that inspired Andy to buy Buzz in Toy Story.

I think this film makes a pretty clear cut argument for how Disney has slowly corrupted and ruined Pixar, forcing the studio to make sequels, prequels and spin-offs that don’t need to exist and to sacrifice their heart and soul in doing it.

I am not going to say this film is awful and needless all the way through because that isn’t true, it does have good moments here and there, but by and large the biggest issue here is that this film never justifies its existence.

I thought the writing was exceptionally weak, which is a shock coming from Pixar. This can be seen with lazy storytelling choices such as having the important crystal be destroyed but then moments later they just have a new one and can go back out into space, with no mention as to how that is. Moreover, the character journey of Buzz having to learn to trust other people and then having an older version of him be the villain of the piece just feels insultingly obvious and on the nose. I understand that this film is for kids so it is not going to have the best writing, but come on this is just so lazy.

Chris Evans is fairly fine as Buzz Lightyear, you forget it is him after a while and the difference between his voice and Tim Allen’s become less noticeable over time.

Overall, fairly meh. Nothing special.

Pros.

It is watchable

It has a few sweet moments

It is fairly short

Cons.

It doesn’t justify its existence

The writing is poor

It is very forgettable

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Bob’s Burgers The Movie: A Cinema Worthy Event?

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Belcher family gets wrapped up in a murder investigation.

I am a big Bob’s Burgers fan and have watched the series all the way through many times over, as such when I heard about the show getting the movie treatment I was excited and thought it would be a significant event like The Simpsons Movie was. However, upon seeing it I am left feeling mixed.

My major issue with this film is that it didn’t feel like anything special to me. Unlike the previously mentioned Simpsons Movie it didn’t up the scale or do something that couldn’t be done on the small screen. The premise for this film could have worked well as a two or three part episode maybe, but for the series first film I just felt it was underwhelming.

On a more positive note, something I did enjoy about this film was how it gave us a deeper look into the series lore and we were given more information about some of the series big mysteries, such as how Louise, voiced by Kristen Schaal, came by her bunny ears. I also thought it was a nice touch to finally pay off the Tina, voiced by Dan Mintz, Jimmy Jr, voiced by H. Jon Benjamin romance that has run the course of the series. I hope these both play into the series going forward and aren’t just ignore for the sake of maintaining the shows status quo.

Overall, a fun time but maybe lower your expectations going in.

Pros.

It is fun

It develops the series lore

It pays off one of the shows central romances

Cons.

It doesn’t feel special or like anything that couldn’t have been done on TV

The humour feels weaker

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The Queen’s Corgi: Not Suitable For Kids

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Queen’s priced corgi Rex, voiced by Jack Whitehall, goes missing and must find his way back to the Palace.

In many ways this is not a film for kids. There are a lot of adult jokes and references that kids just won’t understand. Whilst I do enjoy this films lambasting of Trump, I think more broadly that this films comedy should have been toned down. For lack of a better terms these anthropopathic dogs are horny and make constant sex jokes which feels uncomfortable at times. Couple this with a sequence in which Rex is being hunted down by Trump’s female dog in order for the two of them to breed, which Rex, does not want, and is somewhat assaulted and you can see there is a lot of bad taste issues here.

The film as a whole is fairly by the numbers, it is a plot that you have seen many times before with cliched characters that you will have met many times over the years especially if you watch a lot of animated films. I would say that this film approaches so bad it is good range, but doesn’t quite get there as the bad taste stuff holds it back rather than adding any sort of charm to it. Ultimately you are left questioning the screen-play writer.

Overall, a strange film that most certainly isn’t for children.

Pros.

The Trump parody

The Queen and Prince Phillips relationship

Cons.

The sex jokes

The icky and troublesome sequence with Trump’s dog

It is aggressively by the numbers

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