A Simple Favour Two: Blake Lively Runs Damage Control

The internet’s favourite bogeywoman Blake Lively, Amber Heard has run off into obscurity and Rachel Zegler is a bit played out, makes her film comeback in what might be the most chillingly telling performance of her career.

For those unaware, in the first film, we were introduced to Emily, Lively, a character who fakes her own death and then tries to blame it on someone else, Kendrick, and who has a child admitted to killing her father along with her sister. Therein lies my half joke half speculative theory, how far does life imitate art? Could it not be that Lively was drawn to the character for her own cold and bitter ways, both seek to incriminate someone else for something they did not do in order to punish them.

Moving off Lively for a moment the question with this film becomes why? Why wait well over 5 years to make this sequel and who was demanding for it to continue. Was it the director who has not had much success in recent years, Lively in an attempt to rehabilitate her image that was soured long before her most recent scandal who’s to say.

I think this film knows it doesn’t really have a purpose and so just repeats a lot of the plot beats from the first film just with a few characters swapped around for good measure.

Overall, this was doomed to cost Amazon money.

0.5/5

Pros.

It is hilariously telling

Cons.

It is unnecessary

It is boring

It is a rehash

Lively

It has pacing issues

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September 5th: Required Viewing For Anyone With A Pro Palestine Flag In The Bio

Summary

A film recounting the experiences of a live TV crew during the Munich Olympics hostage crisis.

So this film hits hard in relation to events currently going on in the world and the feeling by some people towards Jewish but more specifically Israeli people. Released in a contemporary setting this film serves as a reminder for what happens when you allow antisemitism to march unchecked through the streets, a lesson a lot of European governments need to here now more than ever.

However, as far as historical thrillers go there isn’t much to set this film apart from a number of other similar films. That is the issue with doing something based on a true story though you cannot really innovate in any meaningful way. Whilst I found the film engaging I wouldn’t say it was edge of your seat viewing in the way something like Argo was.

The cast were all serviceable but not particularly memorable.

3/5

Pros.

It is timely

It shows genuine heartbreak and strife

It is very engaging

Cons.

It feels too familiar

None of the performances are stand out

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G20: The Fantasy World Wherein Old Ladies Can Beat Up Men Twice There Size

Summary

A geriatric woman, Viola Davis, beats up men half her age in a film that is the director’s direct response to mean comments they’ve had online. 20

Thank God Jennifer Salke is out at Amazon, in decades past this film would have been played as a comedy, the idea of an old woman being an action hero is inherently hilarious, however here they play it straight. God knows why.

This film feels responsive in all the wrong ways, it is a fragile left wing person’s response to YouTube channels they don’t like. Not only do they did pick these evil youtubers as bigoted but also position them as terrorists, it speaks to an incredibly fragile person as the creative force behind this film.

Davis is a terrible lead as one would assume her to be, she is not a good action hero she isn’t convincing, her terrible one liners will always make you groan, and frankly I can’t wait for the casting of Viola Davis trend to be over. Here’s hoping the Waller show gets cancelled.

Overall, yet another film from Hollywood where you are the bad guy.

0.5/5

Pros.

It is laughably bad at times

Cons.

It hates the audience

It is the product of a fragile person with hurt feeling

Davis is a terrible action lead

There is nothing empowering about it

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Dirty Angles: Who Needs Men?

Summary

The last gasp of the girlboss

So just when you think Hollywood is learning, when mary sues and girlbosses seem to be on the wane you get this.

The film follows a girl’s school that is taken over during the Afghanistan withdrawal and after a failed attempt by Delta Force to retake it, bah men what can they do, the US government decides to send in a team of women, who easily fix the problem.

My issues with this film is that it doesn’t even try to be anything other than a girlboss film, it feels more like it wants to give a lecture on how capable women can be, something we already knew, rather than be serviceable as either a war or action film. It is curious that the film went this road considering who the main demographic is for these sort of films.

Another thing that haunts the girlboss, dare I call it sub-genre, is the fact that it is always skinny frail looking women that these films expect us to believable can take men three times their size in hand to hand combat it is just silly.

Overall, this is the sort of film Hollywood needs to stop making if they want to make money.

1/5

Pros.

You get a few good laughs out of it

Cons.

It is cringe

The acting is terrible

More girlbosses

It is badly paced

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The Cleaner: Daisy Ridley Somehow Manages To Out Girlboss Her Performance As Rey

Summary

Rey from Star Wars is given the short hair maam treatment and is turned into girlboss personified.

So, Daisy Ridley seemingly only has a career as Kathleen Kennedy wants to keep her relevant, you have to assume she is getting these roles as folks behind the scenes are pulling strings for her as it certainly isn’t her acting chops.

This film wants you to suspend your disbelief to such a degree that you are left wondering if you are having a breakdown. The idea that stick thin Ridley can take down men multiple times bigger than her is frankly laughable, even all the training the world can’t make that maths check out.

Plot wise it is a die hard clone, minus the fun. It Ridley is able to be charming or crack a joke she does not show it here. Maybe if she was playing more against type, and being less of the her-o girl boss she often leans towards this would have been better.

Overall, an incredibly forgettable action film with a Ridley performance so bad it would be an understament to call it wooden.

1/5

Pros.

It is short

Cons.

Ridley is horribly miscast

You don’t believe her in this role

It lacks any kind of charm

The girlboss stuff is pretty egregious

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Emily Perez: Drug Cartels Are Selena Gomez’s People

Summary

Yikes. That sums up the film nicely. Do we really need to say more?

So as many of you know this film has been in the headlines recently for all the wrong reasons, what it should be getting attention for is pushing questionable gender science, having course and vulgar songs that make WAP look like a children’s nursery rhyme and of course softening Mexican drug cartels that kill thousands of people every year.

It is quite funny to see the situation that critics have gotten themselves into on this one, as of course they have to support the film with a trans lead, but now as more and more things about said lead are starting to come out, these left wing critics are starting to have to say things that they may once have said was transphobic.

For me the biggest issues with this film is taste, there are a number of moments and choices in the film that feel in bad taste, simply put. To make a musical about the cartels is simply insensitive and at worst wrong. Worse yet this decision makes the tone of the film feel at times schizophrenic to the subject matter.

Overall, a bad decision all round.

0.5/5

Pros.

It is laughably bad

Cons.

The songs

It pushes bad science

The acting is awful

It has tonal problems

The pace is off

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Baby Girl: Those Nichole Kidman AMC Adverts Have Changed Quite A Bit.

Summary

Hold onto your casserole dishes we get yet another erotic thriller for mothers.

Very much like the Grey films this film seeks to fetishize s and m and puts forward the idea of how hot it is for the boss women to be made to bark like a dog for a younger man. Is this actually titillating for anyone, remember folks when erotic thrillers would just be normal fairly vanilla sex but the passion of it is what gave it the heat, now you have stuff like this done for shock value. I am no prude but I do consider what sort of things are being shown as healthy here, and don’t think they are in fact that.

I find the graphic scenes of Nicole Kidman masturbating to not be shocking, to not be boundary pushing as oh we have never had a scene of a woman masturbating before, glass sealing shattered as we have, but instead rather to be desperate. These sort of scenes are not put in to make some bold comment on female sexuality, this comment has already been more articulately made, they are done for shock value and to be like ‘oh look at how graphic we made it that’s sexy right?’ It isn’t it is just desperate.

If Miss Kidman thinks this will make her anymore relevant or hey even get her some awards love it won’t. It will be forgotten about in about 5 minutes and will only live on in the mind of some old neglected housewife who wants it to happen to her.

Overall, a desperate sad attempt at eroticism.

1/5

Pros.

Old unsatisfied housewives might like it

Cons

It is cringe

It is desperate

It legitimising some morally bad things

Kidman is miscast

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Squid Games Season Two Overview: The Filler Strikes Back

Summary

The games are back.

I really don’t know what to say, this was a massive let down. It reminded me of when you watched an Unexpected Journey for the first time and right when Bilbo and co are getting into the heat of it it’s the end credits. Please wait for the sequel. The reason why the Hobbit films are viewed with much more animus than the original trilogy of films is because they felt like one story divided into three for the sake of greed. This is much the same, rather than give us say a 15 episode second season that provides a satisfying follow up that ends out the series this instead decides to cut out right as the action is getting started. It is infuriating.

What makes this worse is the fact that there is so much filler here, the first two episodes are literally all filler and exposition. By the time the games actually do start up again you are almost midway through this ‘second’ season.

They also shoe horn in a trans storyline that feels very modern day and makes you ask the question why, the answer to that is likely Netflix said we have a diversity quota that needs filling and you don’t have any non-Asians in this so you have to make it up another way.

Overall, I would say don’t bother watching this until it is all out, it is not complete in anyway as is and comes off as massively unsatisfying.

2.5/5

Pros.

The games are interesting

It ends on a high

It has some good moments

Cons.

The filler

The forced in trans storyline

It shouldn’t have been split

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The Heretic: Soft and Bumbling Until He Locks You In A Cage

Summary

Hugh Grant is a religious fanatic.

I don’t believe this film would be even half what it is without Hugh Grant. His performance is pitch perfect, he goes from silly to downright sinister in seconds and the flip is chilling. Even when he is being evil he is still incredibly charming and has his little mannerisms that make it a bit hammy and over the top in the best way. If you are familiar with Grant’s filmography you’ll know what I mean.

As for the film itself I hesitate to call it a horror film, it really isn’t , despite how it might have been marketed it is a thriller film. In terms of thrillers it is not something that you haven’t seen before, it has a lot of very familiar elements in it, it is just with Grant’s performance you cannot really notice it.

I would argue that this film is Sophie Thatcher’s first real misstep in terms of her early career, as she is totally outshone here by Chloe East who gives the much wider and more likeable performance. Thatcher’s character never really demonstrates a wide range of emotions whereas East has to act a lot of different emotions at once sometimes.

Overall, definitely one to check out for Grant alone, however, don’t go in expecting too much originality.

3/5

Pros.

Grant

East

It is watchable

Cons.

It is not very scary

It has been done before

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Woman Of The Hour: Anna Kendrick Needs Her Ego Stroking

Summary

Netflix indulges yet another narcissist.

This time it is Anna Kendrick who wants to direct herself in a film she thinks is going to raise awareness about serial killers.

So once again quality is sacrificed so that Netflix can stroke a famous person’s ego. I don’t know who told Kendrick that she was a good director but whoever it was wasn’t a true friend as true friends don’t lie.

You get a fairly standard serial killer story which might entertain you if you are in the mood for some low brow Netflix trash that lacks any kind of substance. Kendrick doing press for this tried to say that the film had all these deep things to say about society, it really doesn’t in anyway.

I found the acting to feel very much like acting and the film and a dislikable almost self-aware like quality to it with it feeling almost like Kendrick was looking into the camera a few times, if this is her directorial style I don’t like it.

Overall, Netflix needs to start putting quality first.

2/5

Pros.

It is watchable

It is short

Cons.

Kendrick is a bad director

The performances are bad

It lacks any originality

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