The Wave: Nowhere Is Safe From Tsunamis It Seems

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

I think I might give up on the disaster genre, I try, and I try, and I try to get into these films but they all just feel the same to me, this is no different.

The film is deeply predictable and goes through all the regular stages of disaster films, a dad or husband who has had a spat with his family or his wife has to save them and also the world from certain doom due to some natural phenomena; of course he is the only person who can do this. It is tiresome.

I just long for something more original than this. Hell the film even has Danish acting legend Thomas Bo Larsen in it and yet they only give him a few lines and let him hang out in the background of a few scenes, it is a massive waste.

The actual spectacle of the film is good, but it pales in comparison to the natural reckonings brought to screen by films like The Day After Tomorrow. Ultimately in a lot of ways the film just feels very average.

Overall, not as good as you might have heard, very deeply average.

Pros.

The cinematography

A few tense scenes towards the end

The score works well

Cons.

Predictable

Wasting Thomas Bo Larsen

The Spectacle

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Father Of The Bride Part II: Slightly Less Sociopathic

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Whilst I gave the first Father Of The Bride film a hard time I do think this is marginally better. Mostly this is allowing to the fact that this film feels less whiney and cynical, and Steve Martin’s lead actually feels like a loving family man rather than a sociopath who wants to control everyone in his life.

In that regard I think the film does a lot better to make you feel sympathetic towards Martin’s character and to warm to him. There is a scene near the end when Martin is waiting outside the room as his wife gives birth worrying for her and their babies’ safety and we feel for him, this is a million miles away from the self-obsessed ego maniac in the first film that moaned about being comfortably off and living in a large house.

The stereotypes and accents are still an issue with the film’s comedy, and no they don’t age well as you can imagine. I found the film more emotionally feel good then I did funny, I had several moments where the film made me feel warm inside and I had no moments where the film made me laugh- or even really smile.

Overall, it is a shame as Martin is trying but sadly these films just aren’t very funny, to me at least.

Pros.

Less obnoxious

A few heart-warming moments

Cons.

It is not funny

The accents and the stereotypes

The plot makes very little sense

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Infinite: Mark Wahlberg’s Audition Tape For The Role Of Neo In The Matrix

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

I was not aware there was a new Mark Wahlberg action film coming out. Did anyone know about this film? I certainly didn’t.

I found the concept for the film quite interesting, these two warring immortal factions that keep all of their memories when they die and are locked in a never ending war about the meaning of their existence. Though this intriguing premise is countered by all the plot holes that litter the film, and the logic the film uses to try and create stakes.

Moreover, though I usually like Wahlberg action films I actually think he is one of the weaker parts about this film and can’t pull of the Neo charm, as this film is basically a reskinned Matrix, that this film needs. Funnily enough Wahlberg’s previous incarnation was played by Dylan O’ Brien, and he would have made for a much better lead in my opinion.

I also thought Sophie Cookson was the surprise breakout star of this film and had all the best scenes. Though I was aware of Cookson from The Crucifixion she really shined here, and easily had more charm and charisma than Wahlberg for most of the film. Did I care if Wahlberg’s character made it out of the final fight? Meh. Did I care if Cookson’s did? You better believe it. If they make a sequel make her the lead.

Overall, a passable science fiction action film that has enough dumb fun to keep you around, just don’t overthink it.

Pros.

Cookson

Mantzoukas

The premise

Cons.

Wahlberg

The plot holes

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Boys From County Hell: Only Heroes Get Barred From Their Local Pubs

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

I found this film to be surprisingly good. I went in with very average expectations and found myself pleased with what I was offered.

Firstly I appreciated that this film differed from standard vampire lore, going so far as to show how certain tropes of the sub-genre don’t work in this world. I thought that by doing this the film felt original and refreshing, I also enjoyed the uniquely Irish feeling to the film and would like to see more horror comedies or even straight horrors come from the Country.

Furthermore, the character interactions and relationships are well done and actually deeper than they first appear. The father- son relationship, the broken friendship, etc all of these emotional arcs are explored and given a satisfying conclusion by the end of the film and I tip my hat to the filmmakers for that.

In terms of horror comedy balance I would say the film has instances of both, but ultimately leans more into the comedy. The comedy I found to be a mixed bag, and the main issue with the film as there are a few scenes that will make you laugh but for the most part the jokes don’t work; but as I often say comedy is subjective- almost a personal catchphrase at this point.

Overall, I felt something of an early Edgar Wright here- need I say more?

Pros.

Strong character works/ arc

A few funny scenes

The unique twist on vampires

Irish representation within the horror genre

Cons.

It is not particularly scary.

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Luca: Life On A Vespa

4.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Luca delights me by signalling that after a few wilderness years Pixar are back on form. I very much enjoyed Soul, check out my review, but this film is just slightly better: both films, however, are leagues above everything Pixar has made over the last few years with the exception of Toy Story 4– so heading in a positive direction.

All the conversations that have been floating around since release about this being an LGBTQ+ love story or a hidden romance are wrong, as confirmed by people at Pixar. Frankly, it is slightly alarming to even be hearing these sorts of conversations considering the leads are children, who are have not reached the romantic stage of their life yet. Anyway.

I found this film had a good deal to say about our own world and how we view other people, like all good Pixar films this feature was quick to tap into our emotions and once it did it didn’t let go. The final scene is heart-breaking. However, what I enjoyed most about this film is that there are no scenes where the film feels overly like it is trying to make you cry or manipulate your emotions, it is far more organic than that and is better for it.

I found the sun-soaked world of Italy that we are introduced to transformative and lush. Immediately there are so many interesting characters to explore and meet and places to go, when you combine this with the under the sea areas, the scope of this film is truly colossal. I think it would be apt for this film to get a sequel as there is a lot left to explore and unpack.

I found the fantastical elements helped the film to explore the idea of outsiders and those shunned by society very well and brought the themes of the film to centre stage without them feeling forced down your throat.

Overall, a beautiful film.

Pros.

The characters

The world

The distinctive feel

Pixar is back

The final goodbye scene

Cons.

A little predictable plotwise

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Dream Horse: A Questionable Welsh Accent

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Many have taken issue with Toni Collette’s Welsh accent in this film, but after hearing it, it’s not as bad as I was expecting though I can’t really speak to the matter as I am not Welsh but have lived in the area in the past.

This followed a similar film to a lot of other feel good animal films, it certainly wins no points for originality, they raise the horse, it brings the community together, it proves to be a winner, oh no the horse is injured, its okay in the end: beat for beat you can see where it is going.

The film for the most part is functional as a feel good film, that is to say it made me feel good, however, I would say it has pacing problems that make it less pleasing and more irritating as it belabours the point in a few sections.

Overall, this film is very much what is says on the tin, your early guesses for what the film will be like based on the trailers and other promo materials will be pretty much right- this film is not surprising. However, the question is does it need to be? As though predictable there is also something comforting about this film.

Pros.

It is feel good

It is nice to see some Welsh representation within wider British Cinema, even if most of the actors cast are not actually Welsh

You become attached to the horse

Cons.

It is bloated

It is deeply obvious and predictable

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Death In Texas: Perhaps The Dumbest Protagonist Ever

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

I put this film on for one simple reason, Stephen Lang. I greatly misunderstood what the film was going to be about and what Lang’s role within it was going to be.

So firstly, this presents itself as an action film, maybe even a thriller, it is not. The majority of the screen time is the lead having conversations with his dying mother and him drinking in a bar; exciting I know. When we do get some action it is usually just the protagonist walking into a room shooting someone and leaving, it is not very exciting.

Lang, who is only really a minor character, is surprising playing more of a sweet, damaged character than the fighter/badass I was expecting. The film is definitely better for having him in it, yet the film doesn’t really do much with his character.

The ending makes less and less sense the more you think about it, but it is really just par for the course.

Pros.

Lang

A few tense scenes

Cons.

The ending

The amount of needless scenes

The lack of good solid action

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Under The Silver Lake: Paranoia Incarnate

4.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

David Robert Mitchell is quickly becoming one of my favourite directors, It Follows is in my top 5 films of all time and though, like I you may have heard mixed things about Under The Silver Lake it is almost as good- that is a very high compliment indeed.

I found the bizarre and often sinister world of this film to be akin to a confused nightmare, but one that is also pleasant to experience. I thought the world of this film is so vast and so well set up that it is in desperate need of a sequel. I thought it was very clever to leave a lot of the mysteries open ended, as to give them an ending and tie them off would almost be a disservice, this way the idea of what could be will endure in the viewers minds.

Moreover, Andrew Garfield is quickly becoming one of my favourite performers he is so versatile and plays strange and odd characters better than anyone else, with the exception of Nicolas Cage.

Overall, though you may have heard mixed things this film is very much worth checking out.

Pros.

The world

The ending

Garfield

The deeper meanings

Cons.

It does have bloat and could do with being shorter

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Drag Me To Hell: Watch Out For Vomiting Corpses At Your Next Wake

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

I remember watching this years ago and at the time thinking it to be quite frightening, however, upon watching it again now it really isn’t, and if anything the more overt comedy elements go out of their way to take away any genuine fear from the proceedings.

Likewise the use of practical effects and gross out scenes become a double edged sword within the film, as they both add an element of realness and grimness to the film which does enhance it to a degree, but also often look quite bad by modern standards almost to a humorous degree. Scenes such as when the lead goes to the wake and has the corpse leak fluid into her mouth a few times are funny, however this takes away from the threat and fear of the film.

I have written about this several times, the key to creating a good comedy horror film is to allow the film to be both scary and funny throughout the film without favouring one over the other. The issue here is that clearly Raimi has favoured the comedy over the horror.

I think the premise of the film is strong, if a little reliant on outdated cliches, and the idea of being dragged to hell in a number of days is a terrifying concept. I found it evoking of films like The Ring wherein our protagonist has to desperately hunt down a mystery way to free themselves from the situation often for it not to work out the way they hoped, highlighting the futility of the struggle: the ending of this film is very reflective of this concept.

Overall, Raimi has an interesting premise here but loses any real scares to indulge in a juvenile sense of humour.

Pros.

The concept

The ending

The performances

Cons.

The practical effects are horribly dated

The comedy

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The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard: Ryan Reynolds Needs To Move On From Deadpool, This Is An Intervention

1.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

I think the world’s love affair with Ryan Reynolds might be coming to and end. There was a time, when Reynolds was popping up in every film with his Deadpool esque zany comedy- that got old quick. Nowhere is that more true than in this film.

The Hitman’s Bodyguard is a perfectly fine film, not spectacular in anyway, really quite forgettable: it did not need a sequel. Yet for some reason the same jokes and cliches are forced back out of the woodwork again for this film. We get it Reynold’s character doesn’t like confrontation and is very into safety and Samuel Jackson’s character is the opposite, we get it. Yet the film feels like it needs to repeat this over and over again, to make matters worse it thinks this is funny.

Where this film differs from its predecessor is its focus on the wife, hence the name. Salma Hayek’s Sonya is the very loud wife of Samuel L Jackson’s Hitman, and though in the first film she had a few breakthrough moments here she is quickly rendered nothing more than a one note caricature. Sonya is probably the least annoying of the main three characters though she only has a few moments where she is anywhere near likeable. This is by no means a fault on Hayek’s acting, but rather a script that thinks yelling loudly in Spanish is both badass and hilarious at the same time; sidenote it is neither.

To return back to my earlier points about Reynolds, he really needs to come up with something fresh as he can’t keep riding the snarky Deadpool coat tails forever, this film is proof of that.

Overall, definitely not worth going back to the cinema for this film is made for the bargain bin.

Pros.

Salma Hayek has a few moments of good acting that connect

The cringe humour made me laugh a good few times, though I don’t think it was deliberate on the film’s part.

Cons.

It is loud in the worst sense of the word

It is not funny at all

It is incredibly poorly written

It is repetitive

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