The Road To El Dorado: Streets Paved With Gold

The Road To El Dorado is an animated adventure film directed by Bibo Bergeron and Don Paul. The plot sees two rouges Tulio (Kevin Kline) and Miguel (Kenneth Branagh), head down to South America around the time of the Cortes Invasion. The two are there to try and find the treasure of the city of El Dorado, one there they pretend to be Gods; funny shenanigans ensue.

This was a personal favourite of mine growing up, I watched it religiously. I recently watched it again to see if it holds up and I am pleased to say it does. Much like when I was a child, I enjoyed myself and found a smile never too far from my face.

I have been noted as saying I like animated films with talking animal sidekicks, I tend to find they’re my favourite characters, this film however negates that by having two leading characters rather than just one. The interplay between the two men is just what I would enjoy out of a relationship like Mulan and Mushu in that film, I buy the relationship and I think it is funny.

I love the South American inspired colour pallet and design choices of this film, much like I said about Pocahontas I feel like when I film taps into this sense of culture and identity it really brings it alive visually.

I thought all the characters were great, but Rosie Perez did end up stealing the show as Chel, she was very lovable and her relationship with the two men was always amusing.

Overall this film stood the test of time for me, so I hope you can watch it and enjoy it too. It is definitely one of DreamWorks’ hidden gems.

Pros.

The design and the animation.

The characters, particularly Chel.

A great voice cast doing good work.

The songs and the humour.

The bad guy felt threatening, as one should.

Cons.

None.

5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Sleepaway Camp: Sickening

Sleepaway Camp is a slasher horror film directed by Robert Hiltzik. The plot sees a traumatised young girl be sent off to summer camp, while she is there things go from bad to worse and people start dying left and right, but who is the killer?

I will start this review off by saying I don’t like this film, it felt uncomfortable to me in a lot of ways. I think some of the scenes, that I will get to, felt very predatory and the whole film as a whole felt very icky. I would strongly recommend no one watches this film as it doesn’t deserve it, it deserves to be forgotten.

Let’s get to the root of my issues with the film. Firstly very early in the film it is revealed that one of the staff at the camp is sexually attracted to kids, this is then treated by the other characters as no big deal. He then tries to assault one of the kids, again no one seems to say anything. Yes, the character is the first to die, but I ask you what was the need to include him in the first place? Did it add anything to the story? I don’t think so.

My second issue comes from a scene later on in which a camper is showering, it tries to parody Psycho, my issue with this scene is that the girls’ age is questionable, she look quite young and the way it is shot feels predatory. It is almost as thought the film is trying to sexualise this character, despite her supposedly being young. There are a lot of other tasteless scenes scattered through that raise alarms for me, but no doubt some people will call me puritanical, these scenes made my skin crawl and like I keep saying are very unnecessary.

The twist at the end, I didn’t see coming, but it also didn’t blow me away.

I think this film likes to think that it can compete with other 80s slashers, maybe it even thinks it is better than them, but to me this film shows everything that is wrong with the time period and the genre. Give me Friday The 13^th or A Nightmare On Elm Street any day of the week over this predatory trash.

Pros.

I didn’t see the twist coming.

Cons.

It is way too sexual about young kids.

The needless peado character.

The shower scenes that feel icky.

It is slow for an hour and 20 minutes.

It shows the worst of the genre.

0/5

Reviewed by Luke

Mulan: Every Animated Film Needs Eddie Murphy

Mulan is an animated action and adventure film directed by Tony Bancroft and Barry Cook. The classic Disney plotline see resilient character Mulan (Ming-Na Wen), take up her family’s mantle of fighting in the Imperial Army, so that her elder father doesn’t get drafted. The only issue is that women are not allowed in the Imperial Army, so she must pretend to be a man, a feat she manages while accompanied by a wise-cracking dragon and a lucky bug.

I fondly remember watching this film when I was young, and I enjoyed it even more when I rewatched it. This is to me the perfect example of ‘Disney Magic’, there is something about the songs and the hand drawn animation that calls to me and makes me smile. However, it also makes me worry about the new remake coming out; as I strongly believe that it will be losing its’ heart.

I think the songs make this film, again another reason the song less remake troubles me. ‘Make A Man Out Of You’ to paraphrase, is one of my favourite Disney songs of all time and I think it perfectly captures the spirit of the film and is catchy and memorable.

I also enjoyed the characters Eddie Murphy as Mushu is perfect casting he manages to make the character immediately likable whilst also endearing and funny. Mulan herself is inspiring and shows that we can all be a little bit bravery and that we can all be heroes; I think she is one of Disney’s best role models. Finally, I enjoyed the villain Shan Yu (Miguel Ferrer), I thought he was everything a good villain should be, intimidating, menacing and memorable.

Overall, a Disney Classic that still has a place in 2020. It more than holds up and is still a lot of fun to watch!

Pros.

The humour.

Mulan herself.

The action.

The villain.

The songs.

Cons.

None

5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Playmobil The Movie: The Lego Movies Less Successful Jealous Cousin

The Playmobil Movie is an animated action and adventure comedy film directed by Lino Disalvo. The plot follows two siblings Marla (Anya Taylor- Joy) and Charlie (Gabriel Bateman), who get sucked into the Playmobil world and have to battle and adventure their way out. This movies soul objective is to prove that it is different from the Lego Movie.

I had heard nothing but bad things about this film, so I decided to give it a watch and see if it lived up to its infamous reputation. Though there were many issues with it, I will get into those, but I found it to be a passively okay thing to watch. It wasn’t offensively bad and turning my brain off and giving up on the plot helped me to enjoy it a lot more.

There is no sense to be found in this film, it feels very much as though they tried to stuff every different Playmobil playset into the film; logic be damned. Personally, I enjoyed the randomness of it all, but seeing a Viking, a Pirate and a Roman all together on screen fighting a robot is a lot and it is very hard to keep track off.

This film is a musical, I don’t know if you’re aware, I wasn’t and there are a lot of songs which are mostly forgettable; none of them are terribly good none are terribly bad either, that is how I would describe this film. My issue with the songs is that they went on for a bit too long a lot of the time and you ended up pleading for them to be over.

Anya Taylor-Joy is always a delight and she is trying her best here, but the writing and the acting in this film is non-existent. It stems from corny one-liners that you have heard a hundred times before to cash grab celebrity cameos; I see you Mr Radcliffe. I think the film’s choice to make Taylor-Joy’s character the surrogate mum was an odd one and there is a lot more you can read into it; the message the characterization sends is pretty bad.

Overall, this is very meh, if you want to turn your brain off you will probably like it, if you have small children, they will probably like it; as long as they aren’t too discerning. It is far from good, but it isn’t offensively bad either.

Pros.

It is mindless fun.

The randomness is amusing.

Cons.

It makes no sense.

The songs are not needed.

The implications and suggestions around Taylor-joy’s character.

It loses half a point for the weird awkward flossing midway through the film.

2/5

Reviewed by Luke.

The Lovebirds: Sometimes You Need A Sex Cult

The Lovebirds is a romantic comedy directed by Michael Showalter. The plot sees Jibran (Kumail Nanjiani) and Leilani (Issa Rae) as a couple that is on the brink, be forced into a crime caper that leads them to be framed for a murder they didn’t commit. The two must set aside their relationship troubles and prove their innocence.

I put this on because I was looking for a light-hearted rom-com and I think Nanjiani can be funny; I was right on both fronts.

Unlike the other Netflix rom-com I recently watched Love, Wedding, Repeat the leads in this film actually have good on-screen chemistry. Rae and Nanjiani play off each other well and are believable as a couple that has a few issues, but deep down still care about each other.

I think as far as the story goes it is very cliché and predicatable, but then again it always was going to be. The crime elements (proving their innocence), plays out exactly how you think it would, there are a very good laughs and interesting gags thrown in along the way, so it still manages to keep you entertained. The same can be said for the more traditional rom com elements.

Overall, if you’re looking for the same things, I was with it then you will be entertained, if you’re looking for something that will push you and the genre forward then look for something else. I think for what it is it is fine and entertaining enough; would I want a sequel? No I wouldn’t.

Pros.

Rae and Nanjiani.

The humour.

The gags and situations.

Cons.

It is very predictable.

It is the same thing you have seen before.

3/5

Reviewed by Luke.

Pocahontas: The Colours Of The Wind

Pocahontas is an animated musical romance film directed by Eric Goldberg and Mike Gabriel; it is loosely based on the American folk tale of Pocahontas. The plot sees John Smith (Mel Gibson), lead an expedition to the New World (present day North America), where he meet a native girl called Pocahontas (Irene Bedard). The two falls in love, but their worlds soon clash, testing loyalties and friendships.

I think of all of Disney’s Animated offerings this is the one with the most soul and personality, it is so brimming with interesting Native American inspired design choices. I feel like more films about Native Americans are a must, albeit we should probably give creative control to someone of this ethnicity. The depiction of the Natives in this isn’t offensive, though the cliché of the noble savage haunts this film.

I loved the hand drawn animation of this film and thought every scene looked beautiful. I think Pocahontas surrounded by creatures is a very Snow-White inspired kind of thing, but I thought these scenes were especially pretty.

I also thought the songs were great and added a lot to the movie. I think the main song is beautiful and haunting and stays with you after the film ends, I also think all of the songs are incredibly catchy.

Moreover I applaud this film for having the balls to end the film in a sad way, I think it is a gutsy move that pays off. In addition to that the message of Pocahontas staying with her people and not abandoning them and giving up everything about her personality is a good thing that other Disney animated films could learn something from; Little Mermaid.

Overall, I admire this film’s sense of identity, I enjoy the historical period and I think the ending and the songs really benefit the film. My only issues with it are the reliance on worn out stereotypes and the fact that she doesn’t have a talking animal sidekick; these characters are normally my favourite in Disney films.

Pros.

The defined sense of personality.

The songs.

The setting.

The ballsy end.

Cons.

The noble savage is a tired worn out trope, stop it.

4/5

Reviewed by Luke

Small Soldiers: Lets Take On The World

Small Soldiers is a comedy action adventure film directed by Joe Dante. The plot sees toys be created that can come to life, but rather than be like Chucky and kill humans these toys seem pretty content killing one another. However, local kid Alan Abernathy (Gregory Smith), finds himself such in-between the sides and eventually finds himself the protector of the Gorgonites; it is up to him to end the bitter war once and for all.

When I was a lot younger I use to watch this film near constantly, I was unaware at the time that it was made my the same filmmaker who made one of my favourite movies of all time Gremlins, but I decided recently to rewatch it and see if it still held up. I am pleased to say it does.

The plot is laughably nonsensical, but everything is a lot of fun. It encapsulates the magic of playing with toys when you’re a kid, the very real war the toys fight is similar to what would have been going on in your mind when you were playing with your toys when you were a kid; no? Maybe just me.

I think the CGI and the animatronics still look okay, yes, it looks dated, but it still looks convincing enough and it the effects didn’t take me out of the film once.

I think the performances are all pretty flat, a young Kirsten Dunst does her best with a very whacky script thar probably just says ‘scream at the toys’, but this film was never going to be a marvel of acting.

Overall, watching this was a lot of good fun it remined me of being a kid and I still think it holds up in a lot of ways. If you haven’t seen it and are not too discerning, I would say it is a must watch.

Pros.

The dumb fun.

The spectacle.

Reminds you what it is like to play with toys.

It is very wholesome.

Cons.

The acting isn’t great, and the effects look dated.

4/5

Reviewed by Luke

Pinocchio: I’m A Real Boy

Pinocchio is an animated family adventure film directed by multiple directors. The plot sees a wooden doll called Pinocchio (Dick Jones), become sentient and go on a journey of self-discovery with his friend and ethical guide Jiminy Cricket (Cliff Edwards). It is a tale as old as time, Pinocchio learns to be a good little boy, and all is well in the end.

I watched this recently and I have to say it is a lot darker are more messed up than I remember it being; maybe I just didn’t pick up on all the dark subject matter such as child abduction and forced slavery when I was a kid. Adding to this there are also a number of dark flourishes with the visuals and the drawing style that would make me question whether it was really child friendly.

That said this is a classic for a reason, it is an interesting odyssey to watch this little boy go on and the imagination and creativity is exceptional. I think like with many other Disney Animations this film is boosted by having a very likable and witty side character to make you laugh. This allows the main character to drive the plot forward and not also have to worry about being funny. I for one thought Jiminy was the best character.

Overall, this is a very whimsical adventure bursting with imagination, however, there are a number of things in it that make me question whether it is suitable for children, or at least younger kids maybe. But probably like me when I was their age, they won’t even notice.

Pros.

Jiminy.

The adventure.

Pinocchio himself.

The message.

Cons.

The darker and more messed up parts.

4/5

Reviewed by Luke

The Sisters Brother: Joaquin Rides Again

The Sisters Brother is a quirky crime drama western directed by Jacques Audiard. The plot follows the infamous duo assassins The Sister Brothers (played by Joaquin Phoenix and John C. Reilly), as they are sent on a mission to hunt down Hermann Kermit Warm (Riz Ahmed), a chemist who has made a breakthrough in gold prospecting.

The thing that stands out to me about this film is the performances. We get layered nuanced character all round. Heavy hitter like Phoenix and Gyllenhaal knock it out of the park, making what could otherwise be very standard ‘cowboy’ characters feel rounded and three dimensional.

Adding to this the relationship between the Brothers is also very well done by both men and very convincing. I keep saying John C. Reilly is a very talented dramatic actor and this film proves it again. We understand the brothers as people, we can see what makes them tick and understand the ins and out of their relationship the ups and the downs.

Another thing I liked was the fact that this film bucked the trend and didn’t show all the big action spectacle gun battles, sometimes even going out of its way to deliberately keep them off camera. I liked how this film focused more on the brothers and their relationship instead, the drama and the characters were the heart of the film; personally I preferred that to a big noon showdown, but that is just me.

For the most part I thought this film did a good job of pacing itself, but there were scenes that did drag on for a bit too long, I understand that some of these scenes were supposed to be setting the atmosphere, but they felt redundant in that capacity and as such should have been cut.

Overall, a fresh and interesting western film boosted by some strong performances, but it could have been a tight hour and forty-five minutes; a tighter edit needed.

Pros.

Phoenix

Riley.

Gyllenhaal

Not showing the action.

Cons.

It should have been shorter; it felt a bit bloated.

4/5

Reviewed by Luke