Geostorm: The Government Controls The Weather, No Really

Geostorm is an action film directed by Dean Devlin. The plot sees rogue weather patterns start springing up all over the planet after a space station that is supposed to control the weather goes faulty. A conspiracy is at hand and there is only one man for the job.
So, I put this on the other night because I was looking for some fun mindless action that I could tune out to. There are plenty of films that fit this bill and sometimes, silly action movies can provide some entertainment, look at the success of the Furious series for proof of that, but this is not a good ride, nor is it silly, it is simply boring.

The key issue with this film is despite the premise being ridiculous it takes itself far too seriously. This film tries to be dramatic and serious and fails spectacularly, it needs the fun that it denies itself.

The odd thing is, there are moments of light comedy relief scattered here and there within the film, but because the film has committed to this very serious tone, they just feel out of place.

I am not going to harp on about how dumb this film is because anyone considering watching it already knows. What I will say is watching this has made me miss the days of smart action films, smart blockbuster when things didn’t feel dumbed down.

Overall, this film is bad because it doesn’t embrace the silliness that is innate to the premise.

Pros.

The premise is good

Cons.

They then utterly waste said premise

It is no fun

It is too dumb

The acting is non existent

It is dull.

0.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Children Of Men: The Future Looks Bleak

Children Of Men is a science fiction drama film directed by Alfonso Cuaron. The plot imagines a dystopian world where children have not been born for 18 years and most of the world’s countries have been wiped out. We follow Theo (Clive Owen), a man who finds himself drawn on to a path that sees him protecting the first pregnant woman since the world went to hell.

This film is superb, I have been meaning to watch it for some time and I am glad I did.

The world feels so lived in and real, despite there only being sparse hints as to what happened in it. I would love to see more films and additional material exploring this world. The eerie thing about this film is that it is not a million miles removed from where the world is heading now and that’s frightening.

Clive Owen is a strong leading man, he is often underrated and is rarely talked about in good or even great actor conversations, but he is always consistent and reliable. I buy that his character used to be part of the rebellion, he has the ex-solider vibe down to a tee. Furthermore, it is a treat to see Owen interact with the other veteran actors on screen like Michael Cain and Julianne Moore, with both of these Owen has convincing chemistry.

The best thing about the film is how tense it is, there is not even a single minute to breath and you’re constantly on guard watching it as you never know when things are going to turn. A ‘thrill ride’ might be an overused term, but it applies here.

Overall, a great piece of dystopian fiction.

Pros.

Owen

Reminder of reality

The tension

The action, but also the drama.

Cons.

It has a very pacing issues here and there, though they’re only minor and it is perfect for the most part.

4.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Moonwalkers: Faking The Moon Landing

Moonwalkers is a comedy film directed by Antoine Bardou-Jacquet. The plot follows CIA agent Kidman (Ron Pearlman), as he travels to London to get acclaimed filmmaker Stanley Kubrick to fake the moon landing for the American government. However, rather than meet the actual Kubrick Kidman meets two local losers.

This film was one of the best I have seen recently, it was charming, endearing and the action scenes worked surprisingly well and didn’t ruin the tone of the film.

The drug trip look this film goes for works really well and captures the decade of the 60’s really well. It also compliments nicely the plot of the film that is in and of itself more than a bit ridiculous. I for one really enjoyed the absurdness of this film and I think it made standout.

Kidman is perfectly cast as a vet who doesn’t fit in with the world around him. As are Rupert Grint and Robert Sheehan (the two con artists that Kidman falls in with), who perfectly capture the loveable loser angle. Sheehan really gives it his all and gives a very spacey and far out performance that shows why he is one of the best Irish actors currently working.

Overall, this is a hidden gem and definitely worth your time.

Pros.

Perfectly cast

The plot and the setting reflect each other superbly

Great performances

A fun out there premise

Good action scenes

Cons.

It has a few minor pacing issues

4.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Palm Springs: Your New Favourite Rom-Com

Palm Springs is a comedy romance film directed by Max Barbakow. The plot sees Sarah (Cristin Milioti), become trapped in a time loop at her sister’s wedding, luckily she is not alone. Nyles (Andy Samberg), has been in the same time loop for so long he can no longer remember when it started, and the two of them must figure out what they need to do to move on and escape the loop.

This is a film that you should watch blind, it’s very good, but really don’t read this review until you have seen it because I don’t want to spoil anything for you, beyond the base premise. Okay.

The reason why this film is so great is because of the spot-on chemistry between Samberg and Milioti, very few other rom coms have on screen chemistry quite like this; it is in a word electric. Both give great performances, but probably my favourite of the entire cast is J.K Simmons as Roy a man who always ends up killing Nyles at the end of the day. Simmons was the scene stealer of the film for sure.

Furthermore, this film breaths new life into the played-out time loop sub-genre, using it for something new and exciting. Yes, Happy Death Day had a romance plot line and also a time loop set-up, but that was far more of a horror than anything else.

Overall, this is a lovely film and one I highly recommend you see!

Pros.

Samberg

Milioti

The romance

The new twist on time loops

J.K Simmons

5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Underwater: The Threat Came From Beneath The Waves

Underwater is a science fiction film directed William Eubank. The plot sees an underwater research centre become under attack by a strange unknown type of sea life.

I go back and forth on Kristen Stewart as an actress, sometimes I think she is good and worthy of all the praise she gets; other times I think she struggles with even basic emoting and can’t convince me of anything. However, I will give her praise here, she commands this film, her performance is striking and in some ways very reminiscent of Sigourney Weaver in Alien. This film would be far less good without Stewart in it.

Despite, feeling a little too overly familiar this film managed to keep me engaged throughout. It used the environment and tension to great effect and had a few great sequences that will stuck in my mind long after the film has ended. My one critique in this regard is the way some of these high-tension kinetic scenes are shot. The cinematography of these scenes makes them hard to see; which therefore makes it hard to tell what is going on. An example of my point is midway through the film one of the team is pulled out of their suit, but you don’t realise that you just see a lot of blood, you don’t realise what happened until one of the characters tells you. That is a big problem in my book.

Also T.J Miller is in this and he is every bit as grating as you are imagining. Horror/ dark science fiction films don’t need comedic relief.

Overall, a solid disaster film boosted tremendously by a great performance by Kristen Stewart.

Pros.

Stewart

The tension

Keeping me engaged in a played-out idea

Cons.

The characters outside of Stewart’s lead are one note

It is hard to tell what is going on

3.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

The Vast Of Night: Visitation

The Vast Of Night drama science fiction film directed by Andrew Patterson. The plot sees two New Mexico kids become tangled up in strange goings on in the sky and a military conspiracy.

I won’t say too much about the plot here as I think you will be best served going into this blind. However, what I will say is that I for the most part loved this film. I went in with high expectations, because I had heard a lot of positive talk about this film beforehand, which the film itself more than lived up to.

This film has heavy Spielberg/ 80s vibes, its fees very much like ET or Close Encounters Of The Third Kind, a comparison could even be drawn to Spielberg’s copycat JJ Abrams’ Super 8. There is a wonder and a true sense of the unknow that I find very hard to be able to describe in words, but once you see the film you will know what I mean.

I must say I watch a lot of horror films, as a lot of you know, so I have become desensitised to scares for the most part, but this film creeped me out. Its not that it shows you anything creepy, but that the stories build an increasingly sinister mystery that unsettles you to think about. It nails the atmosphere better than any other film I have seen recently.

The ending is great, as is The Twilight Zone ascetic which adds a nice bit of flavour.

Overall this is a must see and shows great promise, with a slow first act being the only slight issue.

Pros.

The atmosphere.

The chills.

The mystery.

The characters.

Cons.

It is slow to begin with, too slow.

4.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Small Soldiers: Lets Take On The World

Small Soldiers is a comedy action adventure film directed by Joe Dante. The plot sees toys be created that can come to life, but rather than be like Chucky and kill humans these toys seem pretty content killing one another. However, local kid Alan Abernathy (Gregory Smith), finds himself such in-between the sides and eventually finds himself the protector of the Gorgonites; it is up to him to end the bitter war once and for all.

When I was a lot younger I use to watch this film near constantly, I was unaware at the time that it was made my the same filmmaker who made one of my favourite movies of all time Gremlins, but I decided recently to rewatch it and see if it still held up. I am pleased to say it does.

The plot is laughably nonsensical, but everything is a lot of fun. It encapsulates the magic of playing with toys when you’re a kid, the very real war the toys fight is similar to what would have been going on in your mind when you were playing with your toys when you were a kid; no? Maybe just me.

I think the CGI and the animatronics still look okay, yes, it looks dated, but it still looks convincing enough and it the effects didn’t take me out of the film once.

I think the performances are all pretty flat, a young Kirsten Dunst does her best with a very whacky script thar probably just says ‘scream at the toys’, but this film was never going to be a marvel of acting.

Overall, watching this was a lot of good fun it remined me of being a kid and I still think it holds up in a lot of ways. If you haven’t seen it and are not too discerning, I would say it is a must watch.

Pros.

The dumb fun.

The spectacle.

Reminds you what it is like to play with toys.

It is very wholesome.

Cons.

The acting isn’t great, and the effects look dated.

4/5

Reviewed by Luke

Take Shelter: Are The End Times Nigh?

Take Shelter is a psychological thriller drama film directed by Jeff Nichols. The story revolves around family man Curtis (Michael Shannon), who starts having nightmares about the end of the world as the film progresses these nightmares get worse and start to bleed over into his real world and Curtis becomes convinced that something bad is going to happen.

I appreciate Jeff Nichols; he is one of the most consistent but also incredibly underrated filmmakers working today: check out his whole filmography to see what I mean. What I think Nichols does so well is deal with complexity, in his films nothing is ever clear cut, nothing is ever as it appears. In relation to this film, we are never given an answer one way or the other whether Curtis is getting visons of the end of the world if he is suffering a mental break. The film ends and then it is up to us to draw our own conclusions.

Normally, I would hate that kind of ending I would say it is pretensions and a sign of someone who can’t write an ending. However, here it works, the ending fits nicely with the overall feel of the movie; it is natural. Something that again helps to get rid of any notions of pretentiousness is how down to earth this film feels, everything about it seems set in our world with characters that could easily exist. This is very true of Shannon’s Curtis as well as Jessica Chastain’s Samantha, both feel very real and fleshed out and both actors give magnificent performances.

Overall, this is a terrific film, it is genuinely tense and surprising throughout. My one issue with it is that it does feel a little drawn out and could probably do with a much tighter edit to trim it down. A lot of fun all the same.

Pros.

Chastain and Shannon.

The ambiguous ending.

The tension.

Cons.

It is too long.

A lot of the supporting cast is very forgettable.

3.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Freaky Friday: A Modern Disney Classic?

Freaky Friday is a fantasy comedy film directed by Mark Waters, based on the 1972 novel of the same name. The plot sees Mother and Daughter duo, Tess Coleman (Jamie Lee Curtis) and Anna Coleman (Lindsey Lohan), switch bodies for a few days so they can each grow to understand the others perspective.

In my mind this is a Disney classic, this is to me what something like Beauty and The Beast is to people who grew up with that classic animated film; maybe that shows my age. Anyway I grew up with this film I watched it many times, there is something of a comfort food angel about this one for me, so recently I decided to watch it again.

I have to say it holds up, there are some not so stellar parts of the film in terms of race relations that I didn’t notice when I was a kid that I really could have done without, but other than that it is still a fun, whimsical good time. I think fun is the word I would use to describe this film because that is what it is, it basically boils down to Lohan pretending to be Curtis and vice versa for an hour and a half. It is dumb, turn your brain off fun.

I think both leads do a great job. Lohan especially. I think Lohan is really promising in this film and you could practically see her movie star future stretching out ahead of her, however that was never meant to be. Curtis is as fantastic as always; she is always a very reliable person to cast.

Overall, it is films like this that remind me there was a time when Disney magic still existed, call it fond nostalgia if you want to, but I thoroughly enjoyed this film.

Pros.

The Disney magic.

The Dumb fun.

Lohan.

Curtis.

Cons.

It does use stereotypes and some questionable depictions of race which could be viewed by some as offensive.

4/5

Reviewed by Luke

Skinwalkers: Hollow To The Core

Skinwalkers (Skinwalker Ranch outside of the UK), is a found footage horror movie directed by Devin McGinn. The plot sees a team of scientist and researchers go to a ranch in Utah to investigate reports of strange goings on and the disappearance of a young boy.

This is your bog standard found footage film, right now before reading this review, before even watching the film, you can tell me beat for beat what is going to happen and you will be mostly right. It is painfully average in a lot of ways.

I have written a bit about my issues with the found footage genre, my fatigue with it and this film encapsulates everything I am talking about. It is just so damn formulaic it is in no way scary or shocking. It is supposed to be about Aliens, so it does have so cool extraterritorial stuff in it, but mostly it is the same things that you have seen a million times before. The moment when a creepy little girl showed up and then her face distorted and her eyes turned black was the moment I gave up; there is nothing new here, nothing of substance.

The characters are generic, as you would expect them to be in something like this, they try and set up a wider world, but you just don’t care.

The only real pro I can give this film is that it is on for an hour and 17 minutes, so it is mercifully short. Overall, it is not aggressively bad by any means there are plenty of worse films out there, but it is painfully average and mind numbingly dull. Avoid unless you’re desperate.

Pros.

It is not terrible.

It is only on for an hour and 17 minutes.

Cons.

There is nothing to like about it.

Clearly it has been made with no real effort or consideration.

It is a waste of your time.

1/5

Reviewed by Luke