Nina Of The Woods: The Most Boring Film Of 2020?

Nina Of The Woods is a thriller film directed by Charlie Griak. The plot follows the titular Nina (Megan Hensley), as she is brought into provide local flair during the shooting of a big foot documentary. Naturally as you would assume from this sort of film things quickly go wrong and become all too real.

So, I have no issue with mediative slow-burn horror films I love The Witch and The Wind, and I even have a soft spot in my heart for It Comes At Night, however I found this film pushed it too far. By that I mean to do slow burn horror right, you need to have an atmosphere that feels bleak and oppressive even if nothing actually scary is happening on screen. The issue here is that this film does not have an oppressive atmosphere of any kind, instead it is the slow brooding introspection of an art film this does not mix well with the type of film this is. Moreover, nothing happens for the first hour and I do mean nothing. Comparatively in Egger’s Witch the baby has gone missing and the family is under supernatural attack in the same amount of time. My point is that this film is just too slow to a point of becoming tedious.

The acting is fine, no one is good let alone memorable. The look of the film seems quite cheap which needn’t be the case as the Blair Witch Project, which this film so desperately wants to be, did a very similar thing with an equally small budget without looking cheap.

Overall, the filmmakers attempt to challenge the genre has deeply back fired and resulted in a film that is borderline unwatchable.

Pros

The film was not offensively bad

Cons.

It feels too long despite being short

It is a drag to watch

The approach taken by the filmmakers seems at odds with the genre

It is a bad attempt to replicate The Blair Witch

It is not as smart, or as deep, or as game changing as it thinks it is

0.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Widows Point: The Type Of Film You Can Make At Home

Widows Point is a supernatural, mystery film directed by Gregory Lamberson. The plot sees an author (Craig Sheffer), become locked overnight in a haunted lighthouse as a promotional stunt for his new book. However, the longer he trapped inside the more he realises something isn’t right and soon he becomes the prey of supernatural forces.

This is a bizarre film. I am not simply referring to the end that literally comes out of nowhere, but rather the film as a whole. Midway through the film there were that many flashbacks and timelines going on I quickly became lost, there is something to be said for keeping you central narrative simplistic.
Moreover, the film as a whole looked very cheap. I don’t know quite what it was about it, yes it would have had a smaller budget but other films with small budgets don’t look like this, in many ways it looked incredibly amateurish; like the sort of thing you might see presented as a student film.

The acting is similarly as bad, and not for a single moment throughout are you convinced off what is supposedly happening on screen, acting or otherwise.

Overall, a very poor film that needed to be drastically reformed to be anything close to good.

Pros.

The wacky randomness of the monster just showing up at the end

Cons.

It makes no sense

The narrative is far too complicated and also doesn’t work

The acting is god awful

It looks cheap

1/5

Reviewed by Luke

Spree: Never Drink The Water In An Uber, Who Knows Whats In It

Spree is a black comedy horror film directed by Eugene Kotlyarenko. The plot follows a young rideshare driver called Kurt (Joe Keery), who is trying desperately to kickstart his Youtube/influencer career. However, when his efforts don’t reap any rewards he turns to murdering his rideshare passengers to gain infamy and attention.

This along with In The Shadow Of The Cloud are my two favourite films of the year so far. This is something so darkly funny about this films critique on modern influencer culture, that humour I believe comes from truth; no doubt there are people out there who do this sort of thing for dark web fame. It makes one reflect on the purpose of it all and questions around validation, does having a large following make us better than anyone else? Are follower numbers simply meaningless? These are good questions to ponder.

Keery gives a terrific performance here, managing to convey both a deeply shy and awkward person who is just trying to get famous and also a cold-blooded killer who has no issues with poisoning people or running them over. Keery manages to make both parts of Kurt’s personality feel different enough yet whole within one person at the same time, no easy feat. Fans of Steve from Stranger Things will have a lot to enjoy here.

Overall, a very interesting film that becomes more so the more you think about it afterwards, the satire our social media society needs.

Pros.

Keery

The satire

The deeper questions

The horror and mania of it all

The ending

Cons.

Some moments are a bit too cringe

4.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Possessor: A Very Different 2008 To The One I Remember

Possessor is a science fiction horror film directed by Brandon Cronenberg. The plot imagines a different 2008 wherein people have the technology to project their consciousness into your brain through and implant thereby taking over control of your body and forcing it to abide by their will. This technology is often used by high profile assassins.

This film felt like a feature length Black Mirror episode and I am not saying that as an inherent criticism, rather a note on the tone and generally aesthetic.

I will give this film props for its visuals and its concept, both were deeply unnerving in both a very real way and also in more of an existential way. The premise of the film itself is so deeply fascinating that you can’t help but think about it once the film has ended. There are sights within this film that you will not see anywhere else within the genre, such is its creativity: one of these shots is the opening when they are putting in one of the implants and it is visceral and sickening and honestly quite frightening when considering the implications.

The performances were all very strong, and I enjoyed the notion of how much of your own actions are really you if you are facing off against someone else’s consciousness. A lot of the things in this film are deep and wider reaching then your standard horror themes, and as such this might not be for everyone.

My one point of criticism would be the end. I disliked how messy and rushed it felt, it seems very much that the film is going a certain way throughout and then bang you just get a whole bunch of stuff thrown at you in the final few minutes and you are left to pick up the pieces and make sense of it. I truly do believe if this film was given even just another 15 minutes it would have fixed the ending.

Overall, very strong and very unique, a bleak look at a potential future where not even our own minds are safe from attack.

Pros.

The performances

The visuals

The concept and the execution

The horror and the existentialism

Cons.

The ending is a mess

4/5

Reviewed by Luke

Shadow In The Cloud: The Next Ripley?

Shadow In The Clouds is a war time horror film directed by Roseanne Liang. The plot sees a stowaway female pilot (Chloe Grace-Mortez), board a plane with a mysterious object. During the flight paranormal forces seek to work against her and to steal what is inside the mysterious box.

Though coming out in the final days of 2020 this may be a strong contender for best horror of 2021, unless something truly exceptional comes out to dethrone it. The sheer level of creativity and originality that this film boasts is a sight to behold, I honestly don’t think I have ever seen a film quite like this.

The scares are well earned as well, whether it is coming in the form of distressing gore, such as when she has to mend her broken finger), or supernatural threat. Both of which help to add to the tension of the film as a whole and make it hard to look away from.

Moreover, I have complained about the female empowerment message in a lot of recent films for not feeling earned or for feeling forced in, but here it is spot on. Grace-Mortez’s Maude is a kickass unstoppable action hero very much in the vein of Ripley or Sarah Conner. Also much like those examples, the film does not feel overt in its messages or politics rather it all feels natural and well done. Honestly the final fight scene is a cheer worthy moment.

Overall, one of the best films I have seen in a long time, a must see!

Pros.

It is empowering

Chloe Grace-Mortez is terrific

There is nothing else quite like it out there

The supernatural WW2 mix

The ending

Cons.

None

5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Little Evil: That Kid Is Looking At You Funny

Little Evil is a horror comedy film directed by Eli Craig. The plot sees a new step dad (Adam Scott), have to deal with his new step son who as luck would have it, turns out to be the Anti-Christ; can the power of the father son bond overcome even the greatest of evils?

I found the parody of things like The Omen funny at first, but as the film went on and on and kept repeating the same parody jokes over and over again they quickly became played out. The same can be said for a lot of the humour of this film.

I will give the film praise for getting the balance of horror and comedy closer to even then it normally is in these sorts of films. The film obviously favour the comedy elements over the horror ones, but there are a few good scares that I actually found quite effective, the worm scene and the early scenes with the hand puppet would be what I point to here.

Adam Scott is just likeable enough to allow you to root for him, and he has enough dad vibes to make his and Lucas’s (Owen Atlas) relationship believable and have emotional resonance.

A final point would be that it is uncomfortable to see Chris D’ Elia in this film, and he features quite prominently as well. He took me out of the film and soured the film as a whole somewhat.

Overall, this film is goofy fun. Is it the best horror comedy film you will ever see? No. Is it without any problems? No, again. However, if you just want something mindless to sit and turn your brain off to then you can do worse than this film.

Pros.

Scott

The initial parody

A few funny jokes and a handful of good scares

Cons.

It gets tiresome

Chris D’ Elia

3/5

Reviewed by Luke

A Haunted House: Back In The Early 2000’s This Would Have Been Hilarious

A Haunted House is a found footage parody film directed by Michael Tiddes. The plot serves to mock the recent trend in found footage horror films, but out of that sub-genre Paranormal Activity in particular. We see happy couple Malcom (Marlon Wayans) and Kisha (Essence Atkins), move in together only to find their new home subject to demonic activity.

In some ways this film reminded me of the best parts of the early Scary Movies, it was funny and silly, and it served as an excellent lampooning of the sub-genre. However, times have changed and as have my comedic sensibilities. When I was watching the Movie films I would have been in my early teens in the late 00’s, and watching them then they were funny, and whilst this film still made me laugh a number of times I also saw a lot of the jokes as being in poor taste. There were quite a few rape jokes that made me uncomfortable, and I think don’t hold up to today’s standard.

Wayans and Atkins are both funny and each manage to hold their ground with the other. I found that they had quite a lot of good on-screen chemistry together and the comedic back and forth between them was strong and well used.

Overall, if I could ignore the rape jokes I would give this film high marks as it is a comedy film that made me laugh, which seems quite successful by what the genre sets out to do, however, those moments of uncomfortableness with off colour jokes will force it to lose marks.

Pros.

Wayans

Atkins

Good comedic chemistry

It is quite funny

Cons.

Some of the jokes cross a line and aren’t funny, namely the rape jokes

3.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Apartment 143: Smacking Your Head Against The Wall

Apartment 143 is a Spanish Horror film directed by Rodrigo Cortes. The plot sees a father and his two children become the victim of a poltergeist believed to have something to do with the recently deceased mother of the children – as is custom the father hires a team of paranormal investigators to get to the bottom of it.

The only positive I can give this film is that there are a few moments that do actually feel quite scary. These are not the moments where something paranormal might be a foot, but are instead the moments when we see that the father might have far more to hide than we first thought. That the real monster might be alive and well; however they ruin this as the film goes on and just ignore the plot thread in favour of a more generic supernatural ending.

The characters are all deeply generic and the plot goes exactly how you would expect. That really is my main take away with this film, it is not bad – it is watchable, but it is deeply generic. If you have even a slight interest in the horror genre and have seen more than one other haunted house/ and or possession film then you have seen this film before.

Overall, boring, and generic.

Pros.

When it looks like the supernatural is not the real cause of the evil

Cons.

Promptly ignoring that plot line

It is boring

It is generic

It is not scary

1/5

Reviewed by Luke

Escape Room: More Than That Thing Your Friends Drag You To

Escape Room is a horror film directed by Adam Robitel. The plot sees a group of people participate in an escape room with a grand prize of ten thousand dollars cash. However, as the experience progresses they soon start to realise that the danger is far too real and that each of them has been chosen for a reason.

I missed this when it was originally released and have since had a vague desire to check it out when I could, so as I was settling down on New Year’s Day and scrolling through Netflix I decided to put it on. This was my first film of 2021.

I am pleased to tell you that it did not disappoint me. At first I thought it was going to just be a blatant rip-off of Saw, but as it went along I found that there was quite a bit more too it. The ending is especially interesting as it implies something much larger and much more sinister (think Cabin In The Woods), that I can’t wait to see explored in the sequel.

Though I did not find it scary, I did find it to be suitably tense throughout. As such I was often glued to the screen trying to see how the characters were going to get out of this latest death trap. In that regard the escape room puzzles and traps themselves were all very original and creative and I enjoyed how the tied in character backstory into the design.

I would say that the performances for the most part were very average, no one really stood out to me in any way and they all just seemed like fodder; if I had to pick a favourite it would probably be Deborah Ann Woll’s Amanda as she had the most personality and character development throughout the film.

Overall, a very worthy horror film with a great ending that really wets your whistle for the sequel, hurry up Sony!

Pros.

The originality

The tension

The escape rooms themselves

The ending

Cons.

The characters were quite generic

4/5

Reviewed by Luke

The Vigil: Waking The Dead

The Vigil is a horror film directed by Keith Thomas. The plot sees a young man (Dave Davis), perform an overnight vigil for a recently deceased member of the Jewish community. However, once his watch begins thing begin to go wrong, and the man must fight off the efforts of a demon if he ever wants to leave that house again.

This film genuinely unnerved me, that is not something I get to say very often. I think by capitalising on an underrepresented type of horror, Jewish horror, we really get to see something fresh and unique. When thinking about these sort of films, possessions films/ demon films, we often are presented with a narrative from a Christian view point, and it is nice to explore the idea of demons from another faith’s viewpoint. The only other obvious example I can think of a similar film would be the Jeffery Dean Morgan stating The Possession where we get the Jewish view point represented.

I think the scares are very well done here and I enjoyed a lot of the slow burn horror scenes. This film does have a few jump scares in it, which is usually a point of derision, but here they actually work well within the film and the film as a whole doesn’t feel reliant on them.

My only negative would be that this film is very bleak and will make you feel sad after watching, which personally I was not anticipating, but be warned.

Overall, a very original film that is brimming with exploration and novel approaches.

Pros

The focus on Jewish mythology

The demon itself, the look and design

The horror

The ending

Cons.

It is very bleak

4/5

Reviewed by Luke