A Christmas Karen: A Timely And Needed Christmas Film

Summary

A karen, Michele Simms, gets the Scrooge treatment.

I thought this film was hilarious, many times I was laughing at how awful Karen was and I also thought it was funny how manic and over the top they made her turn to Jesus moment at the end, when she literally runs around town trying to be nice to everyone, looking like they have put something in her coffee.

I think the plot for the most part is the same old same old they don’t really do much with the Scrooge story that you could call new, they just give it a modern twist. In my mind I am comparing this to the other great non Scrooge Scrooge films like the classic Scrooged and does it hit those same hights? Nope. Though you could argue that is an unfair comparison, as nothing can compare to Bill Murray in his prime.

Michele Simms deserves to win something for her performance here she nails the role of a karen down to the last detail and has all the right mannerisms. Again the scene in which she calls the cops on the little girl selling drinks to pay for her medicine is dead on. Also a nice touch is that they don’t politicise her, you get the feeling she would be voting for Donald, but it never really says it straight up which is good as it could be seen as preachy otherwise.

Overall, not quite a Christmas classic but well worth a watch.

Pros.

It is funny

It nails the karen archetype to a tee

It has charm

Cons.

It doesn’t do much with the book plot

It is badly paced

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A Merry Scottish Christmas: American Exceptionalism In The UK

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

You know what pairs well with Christmas rom-coms American exceptionalism.

So hear we have the usual set up but they have the added drama that they might become Lord and Lady of a Scottish town I guess, because God knows that the title should go to someone who was born and raised in the community what would those savages know no no it needs to be an American. The romantic lead of the film is Scottish and is from the area and runs the estate but he can’t get the title as it goes to a long lost daughter who moved to America and her kids. If anything this film highlights that birthright titles are stupid dumb and harmful, but worse than that it highlights how the Scott’s need an American to save them from ruin. If I was Scottish I would be angry about that.

Ultimately this film just uses Scotland as an exotic backdrop for all those midwestern mums who will be watching this on Christmas Eve, I would argue and I have only been a few times that this film in no real way reflects Scotland at all and could easily be Croatia doubling up.

The romance elements are fine but paint by numbers and you don’t really care about the couple. The real shame here is that the film is not even so bad it is good, it is just bad and propagates how the world needs an American to save it, when in reality they can’t even save themselves.

Overall, another poor showing of the 2023 Christmas Rom-Coms

1.5/5

Pros.

It is not the worst rom-com ever

It has some pretty scenery be it Scottland or somewhere else doubling for it

Cons.

The American exceptionalism

It is irritating

It doesn’t reflect Scotland at all

It is bland

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Strays: A Film That Hates Dogs

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A group of dogs team up to inflict vengeance upon an abusive owner, Will Forte.

This is why people aren’t going to the movies anymore, what is this? This film felt like it was written by AI and who knows maybe it was. To be blunt this is the sort of bargain basement comedy that really is made for streaming, God only knows why they put it out in the cinema.

If you want to see a bunch of dogs do gross and vulgar stuff for an hour and a half then this is the film for you, if you want a half way decent comedy film then try elsewhere. I didn’t laugh once whilst watching this film, in fact if anything I actually think it’s a pretty sad film, the animals get badly abused at times and its not funny its just unpleasant, and I know this is supposed to set them up for wanting revenge but it makes the film hard to watch at times. Take for example this scene, Jamie Fox’s dog character is being carried away by a hawk/maybe an Eagle and this is played for laughs when in reality in that scene the dog would be in a bunch of pain and you wouldn’t laugh at that. Again the film wants you to laugh at the abuse, but it is not funny. Before people say well its not a real dog it’s a film, the film itself wants you to be immersed in its world and view these as real dogs there for you view them as such and therein lies the issue, if anything it is too realistic.

The voice cast are all quite clearly here for the money, and whilst I like to see Randall Park get work I think that this was beneath him. Frankly if this is the state of comedy in Hollywood than all I can say is it is incredibly dumb and mindless. This is not Will Ferrell, who also voices the main dog, screaming every line kind of unfunny, this is watching dog sex for an oh my God I can’t believe they did that moment kind of unfunny.

Overall, poor and soul destroying.

0.5/5

Pros.

If you hit your head a few times with a pan it suddenly becomes funny

Cons.

The animal abuse

It isn’t funny

It feels cheap and desperate

All the performances are phoned in

Quiz Lady: Who Hasn’t Pooped Outdoors?

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Anne, Awkwafina, spends every night watching her favourite quiz show never dreaming that one day she will end up on it.

I thoroughly enjoyed this film, I thought that Anne’s story of coming out of her shell to save her family and be happier was both wholesome and inspiring. I personally found Anne’s character throughout the film to be easy to relate and warm too, I was fully invested in her journey which is a sure sign of good writing.

I would say that the older sister character, Sandra O, was a bit more one note and even a little grating at times, which does drag the film down a little. As sisters you can buy the bond but the chemistry isn’t really there, however they do have a few nice moments together.

I liked the format of the quiz show and thought that the presenter, Will Ferrell, did a good job of making it seem real and authentic. I think that this was Ferrell’s best performance in a while as a more dialled back less shouty version of himself, again far easier to like then some of his more recent forays where he shouts every line to make them funny, a strategy that has never worked.

Overall, a sweet gem of a film that may go missed by many but definitely worth the watch.

4/5

Pros.

Awkwafina

It is funny

It is sweet

It has a great message

Cons.

Sandra O was miscast

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Checkin It Twice: Yet Another Small Town Christmas Movie

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A hockey player moves to a small town and meets the girl of his dreams.

It is all the same isn’t it, do we really need to be here talking about this? Well you clicked on this review so I’ll do my best. We won’t talk about the plot you know it, I know it, everyone who has ever watched a Christmas rom-com knows, they never change.

What I will say about this film is that the leads had good chemistry, I thought that they were not only a believable couple but one that you could root for. Again the writing wasn’t good it was the same set up as always, but the chemistry was good enough that you could get beyond that.

You may get more out of this film if you like hockey, as it has elements of a sports movie at times, not huge amounts but some, again I have been to a few games and know a little about it but think that if you are a big hockey fan you might like this film more than most. Again for a person not into hockey these sections will inevitably drag.

Overall, it is better than the last two Christmas films I have reviewed, those being The Mean One and Colorado Christmas, but not by much.

2/5

Pros.

The leads have good chemistry

If you are into Hockey their might be something to get out of this

Cons.

It is generic

The writing is awful

It can drag at times

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A Colorado Christmas: Vomit Inducing

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A country music star, Brit Ellerman, falls in love with a single mum, Luba Bocain, and has an all American Christmas.

Reviewing Christmas films in February, that is what happens when you fall behind on your backlog, anyway, maybe long enough has past that people are counting down to Christmas again and wishing it was the jolliest season, one can hope at least.

Anyway, there isn’t a huge amount to say except this is exactly what you would expect, it is the most generic form of the textbook. It feels so middle America, yee-haw, that you could imagine this being shown at a Trump rally for how family values should be and for how America is the greatest country on Earth.

If you can put aside the downright fantasy elements of a lot of it, then the sickeningly sweet sentimentality of it all will kill you off. All the characters are troubled and all they need is a little love and family to fix everything wrong with them, you set up the idea that the country music guy isn’t happy in his life and wants a change, will having a family really do that? Wouldn’t changing career paths make more sense.

Overall, it is the sort of pap you watch near Christmas but I think it’s more Pureflix sort of vibe drags it down. Furthermore if you don’t like the yee-haw sort of America I’d give this one a skip too.

1.5/5

Pros.

It is fine

Bocain is clearly a talented actor and deserves a lot better than this

Cons.

The overtly Christian overtones that make it feel like a faith film

The yee-haw America vibe

The sentimentality

It is too long

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i Carly: The End Of An Era/Season Overview

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Whilst I had reviewed some of the episodes of this third season this is to cover the final few episodes and generally my thoughts on the whole season.

So whilst I liked what they did with Carly, Miranda Cosgrove, and Freddie, Nathan Kress, I thought it all felt a bit rushed. I thought if they had spent more time in the two previous seasons getting to this and setting it up maybe it wouldn’t have been as it was, but as it stands their impromptu wedding just felt a bit flat.

Now knowing as we do that this is the end of the show I think they could have made it much more of an emotional send off then it was, as it stands it doesn’t feel like a proper goodbye to these characters. I mean it is so obvious that in the future they will bring iCarly back for a third revival centred around Carly’s child and it becoming a famous star of whatever the internet is in 5-10 years, maybe sooner if Paramount Plus gets desperate enough.

Don’t get me wrong this last season was nice comfort viewing but I don’t think it, or the rest of the show, will be remembered in the same way as the original show was as this never could reach the same hights. I think the issue with this show was that it made things a little edgier in terms of the hijinks but I think they should have gone more mature yet still, more like Friends or The Big Bang Theory than say something like Girls. Still I think that it felt too safe and family friendly at times in a way that limited the show from growing its audience beyond pre-teens and fans of the original show.

Overall, fine but not the ending the show deserved

3/5

Pros.

Carly and Freddie

A few good laughs

It was enjoyable enough

Cons.

It felt too safe at times

The b plot were incredibly boring at times

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Only Murders In The Building: Season III Overview

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The murders continue as the dynamic frays

You can have too much of a good thing, that simply is a fact.

The first two seasons of this show were good if not great, and did a lot for all involved whereas this season instead gave of the idea that the series was running out of ideas. It was not helped by the fact that a theme of this season was separation and the gang moving in different directions each of which feel a little too familiar. The show doesn’t seem to understand how to write solo stories for their central trio without them ending up in a relationship as all did here. I have no issue with Gomez or Short’s characters relationships as I thought they were well done and the two characters played off well with each other, but Steve Martin’s characters relationship storyline made no sense and was just ill fitting.

The mystery of the season is okay and it isn’t immediately obvious though I would say you can see it from the midpoint. Broadly, I would say the highlight of the season is Meryl Streep as she is easily the most compelling new character.

Overall, there shouldn’t be a season four.

2/5

Pros.

Streep

The new romances, bar Martin’s

Cons.

Its repetitive

It feels like it’s run out of steam

It wastes the talents of Ashley Park

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My Big Fat Greek Wedding Three: Once More Into Greece

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

For a series of contrived reasons we need another trip to Greece.

Again this is one of the most unnecessary sequels I have seen in a long time, who thought this was needed and so long after the fact as well. There is a part of me that believes this film was only made as a way to justify a holiday to Greece by one of the studio executives.

Again a lot of the charm from the first film and partially the second was lost here, yes there were still moments of what made the first one so easy to warm to but by and large it was just gone, hollow and empty.

Also whoever thought that the way to sell this third film no one wanted was by making it super topical and timely was again way off the mark. Whilst I agree with a lot of the things the film is saying about society and the European migrant crisis, I think that it is tonally inconsistent with the rest of the relatively lighter fare and isn’t mixed in in a way to makes it feel anything other than forced. Also I get that films are filmed usually a year or two before release but because of this some of the points they were trying to make about the migrant crisis feel a little outdated, again good sentiment but terrible implementation.

Overall, an incredibly unnecessary sequel.

2/5

Pros.

There is some fun

The vistas look nice

Cons.

There is no need for this film

The timely messages are several years out of date

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Barbie: Ken Meets the Manosphere

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Barbie, played by Margot Robbie, comes to the real world and learns about the manosphere.

I was excited for this film for months before it came out and I have to say it delivered in every way I could ever have wanted it to. This is probably my film of the summer if not film of the year.

I think this film did everything right it was funny but also soulful, it was very timely and relevant but also not overly preachy, though plenty will disagree with that, it had the idea of Barbie be silly but also mean something in terms of the world of the film. In terms of tonal balance this film was sublime.

I thought the trip to the real world was inspired, and I thought seeing Barbie have to deal with becoming in a sense defective and seeking out a journey of self-exploration was a very relatable concept for a lot of people. I liked the sheer horror that Barbie had when she came to the real world and saw how women are treated and had her naivety shattered, the manosphere stuff with Ken, played by Ryan Gosling, was perhaps the film at its most grating but even then it saved it with good jokes and commentary. I do believe that the Andew Tate esque manosphere stuff will age the film horribly in years to come, but I can excuse it as it worked really well to give the film a villain that felt earned rather than doing oh the evil toy company is now going to invade Barbie land and enslave them or some contrived thing like that.

Overall, I genuinely think this was a treat of cinema this year.

5/5

Pros.

It is funny

It is timely

It is surprisingly deep

Robbie is fantastic

It is well paced

Cons.

None

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