Avatar Fire and Ash: The Law Of Diminishing Returns

An argument could be made that James Cameron has not been a good filmmaker since the turn of the century. His films in the last two and a half decades have not been well written, or well put together, but hey they have done an awful lot to bring 3-D back, oh wait, and they have made digital effects better, they have looked the same in all of his Avatar offerings. He should just retire.

Avatar as a franchise, it should never have been, is in a pattern of diminished returns with the second film making less than the first unadjusted for inflation, with the third expected to make less than the second and you can see why.

In many ways this film reskins things from the second film, one or two new added components. For example take the big water battle at the end of the film, Way of the Water had a very similar battle the only difference is now the Ash clan are also there. Quaritch as a villain is also going through the motions, his character growth in Way of the Water is seemingly retread as he once again has to way his loyalties, at the end of the Fire and Ash he just randomly throws himself to his death, no explanation, that is the depth of the writing here.

There are two unforgivable elements about this film that in my mind show that James Cameron has lost any magic he once had. Firstly, is the horribly written dialogue which is some of the most cringe dialogue I have ever heard, all of the kids in the film, and you spend far too much time with them, talk like human influencers, ‘bro’ being the default response to any question. If you want to make this film more interesting drink every time a character says bro and you will be passed out before the first hour. You also have ‘cuzz’ for some variety. James Cameron clearly doesn’t know young people and doesn’t know to write for them. Secondly is the pacing, which feels more like you’re enduring a torture session than watching a film. Who needs a three hour plus film filled with side stories that you don’t care about that then repeats the same plot beats over and over again. Increasingly it seems based on how low effort things are here that not even James Cameron wants to sit through it.

The only positive I have for it is that Varrang is an interesting new character and I would like to find out more about her fire-bending abilities, not at all ripped off, and that is it.

Overall, not everything needs to be a franchise, James Cameron should retire.

1/5

Pros.

Varrang.

Cons.

It is cringe

It is too long

It has too many needless side stories

It rehashes elements from Way of the Water

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Futurama Season 10 Overview: Dead Behind The Eyes

Summary

Season Three of the Hulu/Disney run may be the worst.

As you know I am a huge Futurama fan, I enjoyed the Fox era, I enjoyed most of the Comedy Central era, I enjoyed the films, however, the Disney/Hulu era for me has been the most contentious. As you know when I reviewed the first season of this era I didn’t like it, outside of one or two episodes, then the second season came out and I was warmer towards it without it being anywhere near the old stuff, I ended my review of last season on a positive note thinking that it was only up from there. Then they made this season……. Which may be the worst in the shows history.

I think the main thing ruining Futurama in the current moment is the modern dayisms and the lectures, older episodes took political problems or concepts and made them into something fun or treated them as an aspect in a wider adventure, like classic Star Trek. Here it just becomes the writers talking at you.

I will go through this season quickly to make my point. The first episode opens with one of the famous Bender being insecure or threatened episodes, these are always good, and this one is serviceable, its about his height rather than one of his long standing insecurities. There is a better Bender episode later in the season. You will see he is one of the two bright spots of the season. The second episode may well be the worst of the series as a whole. It is a climate change episode wherein they repeatedly say if only this information, that the earth was heading for a climate emergency, was available in 2025, and then go it is over and over again. They also condemn the people of our modern age for not doing more to stop it despite having the information. Despite trying to put this in an adventure it just turns into a lecture its awful. Then you have a horrible Fry and Leela episode where episode now being engaged, she just decides randomly she doesn’t like him as the episode needs a conflict and then sets up a narrative that she is going to get into a relationship with someone else, again. How many times across the show have they done this, it is not trolling the audience it is just disrespecting the world and the characters at this point, they are a couple you went there stick with it, stop breaking them up for episode drama, It is cheap and lazy. The double whammy of these two episodes back to back almost made me stop watching all together. Then you have a very generic and forgettable adventure with talking numbers, it isn’t good but at least it isn’t as horrible as the two previous episodes. The fifth episode of the season starts out as an episode about the parents being upset that kids today are on their phones, you can feel the age of the writers, but actually ends up turning into a delightful tale about Kiff and his son bonding. Kiff, Amy and Bender are the bright spots of the season. The Sixth Episode is about the rapture and has a very solid premise but the payoff is weak and feels like some of Rian Johnson brand audience expectations subversions. The seventh episode is a commentary on Pizzagate, multiple years after it happened and you could interpret it to be an attack on MAGA, it is boring, cringe and played out. Then you have a Zoidberg episode, which despite messing with cannon and still not bringing back his girlfriend, is sweet and does land in the feels. Then there is the second adventure of Bender where he becomes a truffle farmer which is entertaining, it is Bender being Bender. Finally you have an incredibly dull finale that has an overly convoluted premise.

So out of ten episodes you have two strong episodes in Sacred Screenless and Crab Splatter, Two entertaining episodes with Bender in the Trouble With Truffles and Destroy Tall Monsters, then a few mixed bag or generic episodes with The Numberland Gap, Wicked Human and The White Hole, then three outrightly bad episodes with Murderoni, The World Is Hot Enough and Fifty Shades of Green. As such there are only four entertaining or good episodes in a season of ten episodes, that means you are more than likely to find a bad or generic one, that is a shocking inditement on the show.

The worst thing about this season is how it has moved away from being from science fiction adventures to the writers lecturing the audience about what they saw in the news, or some political event that has already faded from memory. This is what happens when the magic is lost from the writing and you are just writing to fill an episode count.

I would say that if the next season is not better I hope this series ends as I don’t want to see it further tarnished.

Overall, a truly bad season.

2/5

Pros.

The four good episodes

Bender, Amy and Kiff’s character work

Cons.

The lectures

It is dated

It ruins the Fry and Leia engagement.

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Stranger Things Season 5 The First Batch: Without Stakes

Summary

Stranger Things begins its final season.

Really, I think this should have been released all at once rather than in parts, the issue with this approach is I can’t really feel favourably to the first batch of episodes, as it feels like they are building to something that never comes. The Vecna fight is cool I guess when he destroys the military, but it also makes how easily the gang beat him in season four seem incredibly poorly conceived.

The big ‘epic’ reveals of this batch are mostly either pretty meh, one of the bad kids Eleven hung out with in season two is back, or cringe such as Will feeling okay in himself means he gets psychic powers. Neither of these things land.

Then you have the fact that like most seasons the series would rather focus on other people rather than developing out the cast we already have, herein represented by the focus on Holly Wheeler, you need to have a child character so the kids can still watch it even though they don’t. As well as Linda Hamilton who seems to be playing Sarah Conner from Terminator Dark Fate. You could have given those roles in the story to Erica and possibly a somehow alive Brenner and it would have made much more sense.

The hellfire stuff was dumb and boring last season and should have been scrapped the fact it is still being rehashed here, as they can’t think of anything else for Dustin to do is a further show of bad writing.

Overall, it moves the pieces around the board and has some good moments, but it can’t give us surprises we care about and feels the need to force in yet more boring needless characters.

2.5/5

Pros.

Finally giving the Wheelers something to do

Having all the characters in one place

A darker feel

Cons.

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Strangers Things Retrospective: Slop Hidden In Plain Sight

Summary

Stranger Things is often held up as one of the great modern series, but upon watching it back a second time you see the power of Netflix and the hype people, to really overblow something to the nth degree.

The conspiracy ideas of the show are interesting, however, it is far too derivative, concepts like how Vecna kills people in season four, or the entire mystery of the first season feel like carbon copies of other things from the period such as the works of Stephen King and The Nightmare on Elm Street films.

The series as a whole doesn’t seem to want to know who it is for either, it has mature elements for adults, yet packs the story so full of melodrama that it could be called a YA show just as easy. The issue with the series as it aged is the fact that it really started to drink its own cool aid, and started to have these big pompous episodes on for far longer than a lot of prestige tv shows, and the reason they were so long, not because they were trying to unpack weighty issues and themes but because of all the filler.

The characterisation and the character writing in terms of motivation feel so inconsistent, characters change massively over the course of the show and not in consistent ways that makes sense for them, almost as though the writers forgot who they were between seasons and just decided to start over. They also flanderise characters, look at Will, people said from the very first episode he was gay, yet as the series progressed that is all he became. The whole of the fourth season was him whining as his straight friend wasn’t into him, it gets to a point where the characters becomes a cliché.

I think with Stranger Things to which I watched all four seasons in the lead up to this final season over the last month, it becomes very clear that if you stripped out the nostalgia, the premise and the soundtrack and just viewed it as a show based on its characters, writing, and themes that it was always slop. The nostalgia and the premise made you think it wasn’t so bad, but it was always slop we just didn’t see it.

Overall, the show is pretty mediocre.

2/5

Pros.

The soundtrack

The mystery as a concept, the more and more they explain of it the worse it gets.

Cons.

The character writing

The pace

The shallowness of it

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Back To The Future: Marty’s Mother Is Sexually Abusive

Summary

A classic doesn’t hold up.

I recently watched this film after not having watched it in years, it was not a great experience.

Some films from the Eighties hold up and pass the test of time and some don’t I would argue this is the latter. Firstly, the stuff with Marty and his mother which is played for laughs is really quite an odd choice and is creepy. Marty is being constantly sexually harassed and at times quasi assaulted and yet this is not a big deal and if anything is just a humorous misunderstanding, lets flip the genders and see if it is still a comfortable viewing experience.

Following on from that is the aggressive amount of product placement that is everywhere. Whilst this could be viewed as gimmicky or a funny thing to laugh at it actually is quite distracting and the more and more it goes on and the more you see the worse it gets. It feels less like you’re watching a film and more like an advert.

The smoking gun for this revisionism is that Marty himself is insufferable, not only is he overly cocky and smug a lot of the time, he doesn’t treat those around him well he treats his dad, back in the past, with contempt for being nerdy, and he takes his girlfriend, in the future, for granted, worse yet he never really gets called out for being the way he is. However, when you watch it back you think if Marty was erased from existence the world wouldn’t be so bad.

Overall, a movie that does not hold up.

2/5

Pros.

It is watchable

It has a good soundtrack

Cons.

The stuff with his mother

The product placement

Marty is not a nice person

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The Running Man: The Pretend Horrors Of Trump’s America

Summary

A kernel of punk rock wrapped in layers of modern day progressive nonsense.

This was a weird one for me to see, that being because I was unsure when it was coming out for me, you see as I have said elsewhere I have moved to Belgium, and unlike other things that mostly come out around the same time as they do in other territories, this film had a split release date. It was coming out in some parts of Belgium this weekend and some next weekend, luckily for me it came out in my part on the former. Maybe this is a common occurrence that I will get used to, but for me coming from the UK with one standard release date for things it was a little odd.

So that personal anecdote aside lets get into it. So firstly, let’s get a few things clear this is a woke movie, in every sense of the word, it parodies the right’s ideas of poor people just not working hard enough, it has the lead be a hero for leaking information to his union, it has the lead in an interracial relationship, as that is the only way you can make a white leading man acceptable anymore. As well as of course all the villains are white men. If you need a little more proof, everyone who helps the lead along the way would be a target voting base for a left wing party, effeminate men, urban minorities, and college educated women. Do you feel preached at yet?

The film does have some good action scenes and a cool anti-establishment feel at times but then it will ruin it by having a line like, I am from the half of the country that gives a damn about people, once again do you get it yet? The style and the vibe you would argue are the best thing about the film. The idea itself in execution works like a neutered John Wick, in the sense of when he is hunted down by assassins, however, rather than intense gun battles you get Glen Powell nude from behind, which access critic Grace Randolph had as one of the main points of her positive review. The desperation and thirstiness is strong folks.

For me personally the best bit of the film was Michael Cera’s character and his Home Alone esque murder house, that was a lot of fun, but the sequence was relatively short.

Overall, all the people who are calling this so timely, need to actually seriously question whether they are delusional and have a look around them, no one is dying on your reality tv shows. Shut up. Yes that does mean you Patton.

1.5/5

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Bugonia: Life Is Out There

Summary

Emma Stone and Jessie Plemons team back up.

So this was a better film than Kinds Of Kindness I can tell you that, I would argue the main way that is true is the fact that it had a coherent story structure and tried to tell a linear start to finish narrative. There were elements that were surreal but for the most part it was all very straightforward.

I thought both Stone and Plemons did a great job as per usual, I didn’t doubt either of them and I thought the story was interesting throughout. I liked how the film kept you guessing about whether Stone’s character was an alien or not throughout, then gave you a satisfying and concrete answer.

For the most part I liked this film the only thing I did not like was how the characters abused a mentally disabled person throughout the film, I found this to be quite uncomfortable to watch. For example Plemons’ conspiracy minded character chemically castrates the fellow, and then Stone’s character convinces him that his friend, as in Plemons’ character, is dead leading to him killing himself. It is a very unpleasant thing to watch.

Overall, the story is good and interesting, it is simply how they treat the disabled fellow that holds the film back from being better.

4/5

Pros.

A coherent and interesting plot

Good performances

Well done, in terms of production

The ending

Cons.

The treatment of the mentally disabled fellow

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Predator Badlands: Baby’s First Predator Film

Summary

A new Predator arises.

There was so much about this film that felt promising but it was just ruined by a series of elements that just don’t fit the franchise.

Firstly it was nice to see more of their culture, and have their family/clan dynamics explored more. However, the way they interacted was far too human for my liking, it needed to feel more alien. Moreover, the final shot of the film that had the Predator’s mother show up was lame as hell and an awful way to end on.

Secondly, the combat was fun and well done for the most part. This was probably the most important part to get right, it was interesting to see how the Predator fights as in other films we don’t get to see it so much. However, this was offset by the comedic sidekick. Personally I like Elle Fanning, I think she is an interesting actress and I like seeing the project she picks, she has great range. Although it must be said neither of the character’s she played here worked. On the one hand you had the quirky, overly talkative, positive robot, which made jokes throughout the film and killed any tension, and on the other hand you had another synthetic that also looked like her that was the stern, no feelings, girlboss which they at least turned into a villain. Personally I don’t think comedy has any place in a Predator film.

The cute animal sidekicks also felt like very current day Disney, they use these creatures to try and lure in women who might be otherwise put off by the science fiction or the violence. Once again Predator as a franchise is heavily male leaning so it should not have done this as it contributed, along with the humour, to this not feeling like a Predator film.

Then you have the fact the film constantly makes the Predator weak and ineffective and tries to lessen him. This again feels very current day Disney, again in their culture they train to hunt from the moment of birth so some of the mistakes he makes are not only stupid but break the lore.

Overall, a deeply mixed film.

2.5/5

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Star Wars A New Hope: A Slow Start

Summary

The Saga begins.

For me this is easily the worst of the Original Trilogy, and that is mainly due to the pacing of the film. It takes a long time to get going, when it does it picks up, but there is a lot of time before Luke, Mark Hamill, meets the Rebellion.

It is well done at setting up things to come and makes the universe feel really and lived in, you can see why it became so popular as the universe is crying out with stories to tell. However, it would and does later, benefit from being a bit more in depth, the characters we are meeting here are interesting but paper thin, if you think about any of the central trio, simply as this film presents them you will see they are not well rounded characters.

You do get some cool set pieces such as whenever Darth Vader is on screen but these are few and far between.

Overall, slow yet with promise.

2/5

Pros.

Some cool set pieces

It sets up an interesting world

Cons.

It is slow

The acting isn’t great

The characters are paper thin

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Jurassic Park: Overrated In The Extreme

Summary

The older I get the more I realise that Steven Spielberg is not a good director.

Removed from a childlike lens of whimsy I wanted to see how this film held up. If it was the masterpiece people seem to think it is, turns out they are wrong.

Whilst I appreciate what this film was doing, when it was doing it, and the lasting impact it has had. That does not change the fact it is just the same thing over and over again, dinosaur attacks, kills a person and moves on to the next, yes there are a few tense scenes where the dinosaurs are looking for people to kill but don’t find anyone, but that’s it. I think if this film had not been so visually impressive when it came out many people wouldn’t have bat an eye, it is just a generic shark film plot but with dinosaurs.

The plot is glacially slow in actually getting off the ground with the dinosaurs breaking out, and the film feels so bloated at times that it is distracting. One could argue what it would be like if it was not given to Spielberg at the height of his power and was instead given to someone who actually wanted to make a tight film.

Overall, disappointing and highlighting the very worst of Spielberg

1/5

Pros.

It is visually interesting

Cons.

It is badly paced

The acting isn’t very good

It is repetitive

It is bloated

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