Christmas Eve: Never Get In A Lift Again

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A series of people get stuck in lifts, elevators for The American audience, and have reflective life experiences.

When one begins to dive into Christmas films they are met with one absolute truth, most of the genre is awful. For every Elf and Home Alone there are one million made for TV Christmas films which serve as nothing more than a resequencing of cliches and stale jokes. Though I can’t speak for whether this film was made for TV, as honestly I don’t know, I can say there is a clear reason why this film has a zero on Rotten Tomatoes.

All of the sentimentality in this film feels like it was constructed by a robot that is devoid of human emotion and that does not know how people interact, a lot of the character interactions in this film range from either comically evil and cold to downright predatory and creepy, it is not a likeable bunch yet the film still tries to force in sentiments to the contrary. Even in a Christmas film some people are still going to be trash.

This film trots out Patrick Stewart to try and prop it up, and try though he might, it just feels like he is playing a bargain bin version of his Scrooge character. Even he can’t save this film.

Overall, yet another bad Christmas film.

Pros.

It is short

Cons.

The characters are creepy, cold and mostly awful

It has pacing issues

It can’t get the sentiment even remotely right

The ending

It wastes Stewart

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Demolition: Dealing With Grief By Taking Apart Lights In Toilets

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The film follows Davis Mitchell, played by Jake Gyllenhaal, a man who after the death of his wife Julia, played by Heather Lind, realises he feels nothing at her death and starts objects apart to try and find some meaning in his life, whilst also maintaining a pen pal like relationship with fellow lost soul Karen, played by Naomi Watts.

I enjoyed this film for the simple fact of it being Jake Gyllenhaal being strange, there is a lot to mine in that area. Gyllenhaal is of course suitably wacky here and has a lot of fun in the role, I enjoyed the idea of him slowly realising how unhappy he was in life and viewed the ending with him knocking down his house to be the ultimate catharsis. I thought the emotional impact was mostly on mark though there were a few times it strayed into aimlessness.

I would say the thing that holds this film back from getting higher on my rating is the pacing, the film often feels like it is dragging by and needs to move at a quicker pace than it does as when it drags it loses the attention of the viewer, or it did me.

Overall a good Gyllenhaal performances however the film as a whole has a fair amount of issues.

Gyllenhaal being strange

The ending

It feels cathartic

Cons.

Pacing issues

A confused message

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Drive My Car: Listening To Tapes From Your Dead Wife

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The film follows Yusuke Kafuku, played by Hidetoshi Nishjima, who after the death of his wife Oto, played by Reika Kirishima, tries to continue on living his life and begins trying to organise a play.

I thought this film was more good than bad. Certainly there is no getting around the fact that this film wont be for everyone, the run time alone is enough to put most off: clocking in at almost three hours and there is no real reason for this long runtime. However, those that stick with it are in for a deep dive into the human soul that in many ways is rewarding.

The characters are all strong and well developed, a pro for the long run time is that many of the characters get explored and are given plenty of focus. I also think the thematic exploration is where this film really shines as it has a lot to say on relationships and grief, most of which is quite insightful. I truly do think the strong point of this film is the writing.

Overall, this film will not be to the taste of many and the long run time will prove testing but there is something worth seeing here.

Pros.

The writing

The themes

The performances

Cons.

The run time

The ending is a little vague

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Boiling Point: The Worst Night Ever

4.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A chef must contend with a nightmare evening where everything goes wrong.

This is an emotional gut punch of a film, stressful is how I would describe it. The stress being felt by Stephen Graham’s Andy is so palpable that it comes through the screen and you feel it too. You latch on to Andy so much and relate with him as he is just trying to keep it all together, however as the film progress you see that maybe Andy isn’t so great. I enjoy the emotional ambiguity towards the end of the film, I think it makes the whole piece feel more rounded and nuanced.

In many ways this film feels like a horror film and is hard to watch at times if you have ever worked in a restaurant before either in the kitchen or in the front of house you will feel the terror of this film and it will leave you in a cold sweat.

I think the greatest thing about this film is Stephen Graham. Graham is one of the most reliable actors working today, often terrific and when used properly is the high point of any film that is the case here. Graham play’s damaged character just so well and throughout the film he portrays the moral ambiguity and vulnerability of Andy with such sincerity that he becomes real.

Overall, a magnificent film that is sure to horrify anyone who has ever worked in a restaurant.

Pros.

Graham

The tension

The moral ambiguity

The ending

Cons.

The health inspection scene drags for just a little bit

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Calendar Girls: The Calendar That Titillated The World

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A group of older Yorkshire women pose nude for a calendar to raise money for cancer patients. Based on a true story.

I found this film to be enjoyable to watch and mostly feel good. Yes, there were one or two moments that were a little on the depressing side but for the most part it was a cheery celebration of life.

I thought all of the performances across the board were strong, Helen Mirren and Julie Walters are both compelling co-leads and both are relatable with their individual struggles and how they handle their fame. I thought it benefited the film to have the reflection on fame and what it can do to up end a life, it made the characters feel genuine and real.

My issues with the film would come as a result of a very played out narrative that feels been there done that. Obviously this film was pinned down as it was a true story so had to stick to that, but a lot of the emotional beats and revelations about life felt deeply generic and puddle deep. The film was also insanely predictable.

Overall, a sweet if overly familiar film.

Pros.

Mirren and Walters

It is very watchable

A few funny lines

Cons.

It is very predictable

It feels played out

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Off The Rails: Singing Song Lyrics Out Loud To Signify You Are Sad

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A group of friends get together after the death of one of their member and decide to go on a European trip.

Frankly there just isn’t anything new about this film, you have seen this film before and no the film doesn’t do anything new with it.

A bigger issue with this film is the fact that it is overly sentimental and that none of its emotion comes across and genuine or heartfelt. Rather it comes across as depressing. All of the emotional moments in this film feel cliched and predictable and as such have no impact. By the end of the film you are left feeling depressed and as though you might have wasted your time.

This film makes a big deal out of the fact that it heavily features the music of Blondie, even having the characters singing lyrics in supposedly sad moments for some reason, however even as a Blondie fan I didn’t find anything particularly impressive about this. Other than the very ham-fisted way I have already mentioned the catalogue of songs are not used for any real purpose.

Overall, though I like Sally Phillips, and she is a saving grace here, this film is simply depressing and played out.

Pros.

Phillips

It is short

Cons.

It is depressing

They waste Blondie

The emotion doesn’t land and feels fake

Judy Dench is forced in for no reason

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Belfast: Personal Yet Familiar

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The life and times of a young boy, played by Jude Hill, from Belfast whose family has to come to terms with leaving the area to escape the Troubles.

Do I think this is a good film? Yes. Do I think it should be inevitably nominated for Best Picture? No. This is a good film in many ways but it is not spectacular, and despite this being a very personal journey and reflective of a certain time and place there is an element over familiarity here, meaning you have seen this film before the plot is not quite as fresh as it really ought to be.

I thought this film particularly came into its own when dealing with emotion. I thought there were a number of stirring scenes here, the final scenes we get with Ciaran Hinds’ Pop and Judi Dench’s Granny and both powerful and the shop looting sequence is also quite harrowing. I was impressed with the film in that it both manages to show the danger of the Troubles whilst also presenting it from the point of view of a naïve child and keep the lens being from his perspective but at the same time not losing any of the perceived danger.

I thought the performances were good across the board however, I think Caitriona Balfe should be spotlighted for any awards nomination from this as she was excellent here- easily stealing the show.

Overall, a powerful yet familiar film.

Pros.

A strong cast across the board

Managing childlike nativity with the grim reality

The ending

Balfe especially

Cons.

The plot feels a little bit overly familiar

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The Power Of The Dog: What Did That Horse Do To Him?

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Phil Burbank, played by Benedict Cumberbatch berates those around him for a few hours in a period setting.

To me this film embodied everything wrong with arthouse cinema. It is pretentious, it thinks it is deeper than it actually is, and none of it really leads anywhere it just a series of scenes spaced out with rants from Cumberbatch.

Honestly I found this film hard to watch as it was so slowly paced that it almost put me to sleep. Really the only interesting part of this film was seeing must how unlikeable Cumberbatch’s Phil could become and seeing how sinister he could get.

Moreover, if you like animals this may not be the film for you as there are a number of scenes where Phil is cruel to animals, and it can be distressing and hard to watch. I understand why the filmmakers choose to include these scenes, to show just how evil Phil is, but they can’t shake this overwhelming sense of needlessness.

Overall, Cumberbatch is good but the film as a whole is boring, hard to watch and far from what it thinks it is.

Pros.

Cumberbatch

It is interesting to watch Phil devolve

Cons.

It is overly pretentious

It is boring and far too long

Scenes of animal cruelty that feel needless

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Repeat: Don’t Talk To The Dead

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Ryan Moore, played by Tom England, devotes his life to creating a machine that can supposedly allow a person to contact the dead. However, during his obsession his daughter goes missing and he then tries to use his machine to find her on the other side and either save her from dying or bring her back.

I think this film has a strong hook. The premise feels fresh and I can’t remember seeing other films like it, moreover, the narrative doesn’t end up where you are expecting it to, there are some twists and turns and for the most part they are quite shocking and unexpected.

The marketing I had seen for this film made me think it was a horror film, however this is untrue. I would say this film is more of a bleak, Black Mirror esque, science fiction film. With that I found it to be at times quite bleak and upsetting, though I suppose that was the point. With the notion of be careful what you wish for being central to the narrative of the film.

I thought the performances across the board were fairly strong with both England and Charlotte Ritchie doing a lot with what they were given, and turning their characters into real people that you can empathise with.

Overall, a strong science fiction film that was a little too bleak for my taste.

Pros.

The acting

The plot

The twist

Cons.

Manically bleak

A few pacing issues

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Spencer: Abolish The Monarchy

4.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Recounting a Christmas that Princess Diana, played by Kristen Stewart, spent with the Royal Family one Christmas

This film is haunting. If going in expecting a standard Royale biopic, expect to be shocked at every turn. Indeed this film plays more like a horror film, with the social anxiety themed horror becoming unbearable at times. However, the real horror here is the cold and almost sadistic way Diana is treated at every turn by the hands of the Royals and their staff. Now this film is not based on actually events, as far as I am aware, it takes certain elements of Diana’s life and takes a bit of creative license with them, but if even one scene of this film is true it should be enough to make any decent Brit question their support of the Royal family.

Prior to the release of this film I made several comments saying how terribly miscast Kristen Stewart was in the role and how she would eventually doom the piece. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Stewart is chameleonic here and blends so seamlessly into this world that you will be hard-pressed to not see her as Diana. From her movements to her mannerism to even her accent Stewart nails the role perfectly.

Moreover, Stewart is supported by an incredible British cast with Sean Harris and Timothy Spall being equally as commendable.

Overall, this is a magnificent film and Stewart deserves to win awards for her performance here.

Pros.

The tension

It feels more like a horror film

The more out there elements

Stewart

The ending

Cons.

A few slight pacing issues resulting in a drag in the third act

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