Halo: Unbound

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

One of the worst second episodes to a show I have ever seen. This will be my last time reviewing this show.

Where to begin…. The thing I had the biggest issue with was the fact that this episode let all the air out of the balloon in terms of the momentum the first episode set up and greatly slowed down the pace. I wasn’t expecting all that much from this second episode, especially after the mixed bag that the first episode was, but I was at least expecting it to not be dull, sadly that is too much to hope for.

Moreover, though last week I said I didn’t really care that this show completely ignored the games and the pre-established lore, well things changed here. Midway through the episode I realised that this show has the exact same problem as Netflix’s Witcher series, it takes character names and the franchise name but it makes something unrecognisable out of it. By all intents and purposes, this is just a deeply generic science fiction show with the Halo name slapped over it.

Further in that vein, Master Chief, played by Pablo Schreiber, is taking off his helmet so much here that you forget he even is Chief at times and think you are following a new if entirely forgettable character, but no.

I won’t even start on what they are doing with Cortana, but I will say yikes.

Overall a huge miss for Paramount +.

Pros.

Pablo Schreiber is really trying and deserves far better than this mess.

Cons.

This isn’t Halo

Master Chief constantly taking his helmet off

Cortana

The pacing

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Halo: Contact

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Master Chief, played by Pablo Schreiber, breaks into TV.

This first episode was a mixed bag for me, certainly not as good as I was hoping it would be, but also not as bad as some out there would have you believe, simply by existing this won’t destroy all copies of the games and novels and won’t forever change the Halo universe for the worse.

My main issue with this show was how much like The Mandalorian it felt, straight down to the stoic lead taking on a younger sidekick who then forces them to confront their views on life; doesn’t sound much like Halo does it? In many ways Master Chief is side-lined, with Kwan, played by Yerin Ha, being the real lead, if this continues to be the case throughout the series I doubt I’ll make it till the end.

I also did not like how the show seems more interested in rebellion against the UNSC, then it does with the war against the Covenant, but hey only one can stand in as a thinly vailed comment on real world injustice right? We all know every show that comes out now has to feature it in some way, escapism is dead.

Chief taking off his helmet for quite a long stretch near the end doesn’t really bother me too much, neither does the fact that this show spits all over the series lore as I was not particularly invested in the property before watching this.

The things I did enjoy about it were twofold. Firstly, I appreciated the fact that this series actually looks like it had some money spent on it, yes I am looking at you Cad Bane in The Book Of Boba Fett, by that I mean this series boasts some fairly well done visuals and the effects mostly hold up across this first episode.

Secondly, this opening chapter featured some nice well shot action which I also enjoyed, hopefully as the series goes on we will get more of that.

Overall, a redeemable if troubled start.

Pros.

The action

The effects

Schreiber

Cons.

Side-lining Chief

Copying the Mandalorian

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The Adam Project: Possibly Ryan Reynold’s Best Performance

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Pilot Adam Reed, played by Ryan Reynolds, goes back in time to stop the invention of time travel, along the way he encounters his younger self, played by Walker Scobell.

I thought this was the best Ryan Reynolds performance I have seen in a long time, mainly this was due to the fact that he distances himself from his Deadpool-era quips and plays the role in a mostly straight, earnest way. There is a very believable emotional depth to Reynolds’ performance here that really resonates with you.

In that vein, I think the biggest strength of this film is the fact that it wears its heart on it’s sleeve and focuses on family dynamics and emotions between the characters. There are various different dimensions that the film approaches this from such as father-son relations as well as mother-son relations, which is refreshingly modern and fresh. There is also quite a lot of nuance and complexity to the relationship between the two Adams.

The only area wherein I would criticise this film is that its science fiction narrative feels very generic and uninspired, we have all seen this before and as such it remains unsurprising.

Overall, a very sweet and earnest film that is in some ways held back by its science fiction premise.

Pros.

Reynolds

Garner

Ruffalo

The emotion

Cons.

Pacing issues

The premise is fairly been there, done that.

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Jurassic World: The Heels That Sparked A Conversation Around The World

3/5

Reviewed by Luke

Summary

No franchise is ever allowed to end anymore, as such it was only a matter of time before the Jurassic Park franchise got the soft-reboot treatment.

I remember I watched this a few times when it first came out at the cinema, I am by no means a big Jurassic Park fan, but I do find the films to be good popcorn fare. They aren’t challenging, but they never needed to be.

There is always something exciting about watching a CGI dinosaur cause havoc, however, that is offset when you force in human characters that are so bland that you can’t remember their names seconds after the credits roll.

Chris Pratt is just playing his usual cool guy action role and doing nothing even remotely close to acting, and though Bryce Dallas Howard fares slightly better her character is ridiculous in all the wrong ways, the decision to have the character run in heels is still baffling to me.

Overall, it is easier to watch and less objectionable than its sequel but it is never more than forgettable.

Pros.

It is watchable

There is fun to be had

The spectacle

Cons.

The human characters

It is very forgettable

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Battleship: Rihanna Won’t Be Winning An Oscar Any Time Soon.

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Aliens invade and of course it is down to the US Navy to save us all.

I will give this film props for actually making a full fledge film out of a board game, though the story is nothing new or novel it is serviceable and it gives me hope for future films being based on boardgames, of which there are many.

Moreover, this film features one of my favourite actors Taylor Kitsch, who has never been given the recognition he deserves which is a shame as he is genuinely good a lot of the time. Here is no exception, Kitsch brings a lot of energy to the part and perfectly captures the everyman hero vibe.

Sadly, that is were the praise ends. For the most part the wider supporting cast is wasted and reduced to stereotypes, however that is not the case for Rihanna’s Cora Raikes, who is featured prominently especially towards the end of the film, by the end of it you realise what a mistake that is as Rihanna is a very poor actor. To me this just felt like an ego trip for Rihanna, she wanted to be an actor so her star-power bought her a role, this is a shame as a less famous but much more talented actor could have done a lot with the part.

Furthermore, the aliens themselves look awful. The CGI is not just bad but also overused resulting in a horrifying and upsetting spectacle.

Overall, Kitsch is good and there is some fun to be had but really there was no need to make a film based on the boardgame Battleship and this film proves that.

Pros.

Kitsch

Some fun to be had

Cons.

Rihanna

The aliens

It is generic and dull

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The Book Of Boba Fett: In The Name Of Honor

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The war between Boba Fett, played by Temuera Morrison, and the Pike Syndicate finally comes to blows.

This was one hell of a mixed bag.

On the one hand you had the Grogu and Din, played by Pedro Pascal, stuff, which was really sweet and well done and honestly also quite effecting. As well as some great action set pieces that felt intense and bloody, and had a nice heft to them that helped you forget you were in Disney era star wars where blasters are set to stun half the time.

However, on the other and infinitely worse hand you had the Mods at their most insufferable, lecturing Boba Fett, an experienced mercenary, on battle tactics and social justice and being far too prominent during the final battle. The social justice message of the Mods really makes me dislike them, and it takes me out of the show and makes me feel like Hollywood Z listers are talking down to the fans. I understand that Robert Rodriguez likes to push diversity in his kids films now, and for the most part that is admirable and well done, but here it is forced down your throat by characters that never fit into the universe. Also surely if it was a diverse street gang they would have at least some alien members? No? That seems well thought through.

Moreover, this episode has Boba learn that it was in fact the pikes that killed his beloved Tuscan Raider tribe, yet can he avenge them? No, no he can’t. Instead the show has to once again take the action and badass moment away from Fett and give it to Fennec Shand, played by Ming-Na Wen, which feels illogical and like a slap in the face to anyone invested in the show. To not give this to Boba means his character journey is not ended in any meaningful way.

Finally, and perhaps most egregiously of all they kill off Cobb Vanth, played by Timothy Olyphant, off-screen…… The last episode had him survive his injuries, what happened? Honestly this made me want to turn off the finale.

Overall, Boba Fett spent more time in a bacta tank then doing anything even remotely cool.

Pros.

Grogu

The action

Cons.

The Mods

Cad Bane’s awful death that looked hilariously bad

Not finishing Boba’s character arc

Cobb Vanth

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Moonfall: The Height Of Originality

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

There is an evil alien force inside the moon that is pushing it out of orbit and onto a collision course with the Earth, however, have no fear as there are a group of Americans ready to save the planet.

I think it is nothing short of the best joke of the year so far that the director of this film Roland Emmerich had a go at the MCU for lacking originality, and then made this film. A highly derivative disaster film. What makes this lack of originality even worse is that this doesn’t even seem to be Emmerich ripping off other better films, no, he is ripping off his own films. How lazy can you get.

Moreover, the pacing of the film is awful. It is so littered with sub-plots and pointless characters that you almost forget about the moon stuff half of the time. There are also constant references to ‘our friends the Chinese’ which feel quite clearly forced in to pander to the China market, as no studio in Hollywood has a soul.

However, the film is saved somewhat by being so dumb that you just have to laugh. More often than not the film is unintentionally hilarious, and John Bradley shines as the comedic standout here with a few deliberately funny lines of solid cringe comedy. I also thought the film nailed emotional impacts when it went for them such as in the final sacrifice scene.

Another thing I would give this props for is it’s unhinged third act that takes all the conspiracy theories you are likely to see on your parent’s Facebook, now Meta, page and crams them all together to create something that whilst being a mess works for the sheer strangeness of it.

Overall, it is watchable but not good. Quite a mixed bag.

Pros.

Bradley

The cringe comedy

The ending and wider third act

Cons.

It is dumb

It panders to the Chinese

It has awful pacing

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The Book Of Boba Fett: From The Desert Comes A Stranger

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Mandalorian season 3 continues on with a silent cameo from Boba Fett, played by Temuera Morrison.

I think this may have been the best episode of the series yet. Admittedly much like with last week’s episode it is concerning that the episode without Fett in them pretty much at all are the best ones, considering this is Boba Fett’s show. In my mind this has now just become The Mandalorian but under a different name.

I think this episode does a lot right, I enjoyed that it brought back Timothy Olyphant’s Cobb Vanth, Olyphant can do no wrong and he was on fire in this episode. Likewise I thought they nailed the emotional reunion between Din, played by Pedro Pascal, and Grogu: though not much of a reunion took place. I thought the episode’s cliff-hanger cruelly played with our emotions in the best way, though I have a fairly good feeling I know where it is all heading.

The things I don’t enjoy about this episode all come back to the same thing, the effects. Ashoka, played by Rosario Dawson makes a return to the show and continues to look like a cosplayer, there is something deeply uncanny about the way her character looks as she moves, especially when there is a focus on her talking. It is quite jarring. Moreover, the bad effects continue with the return of a de-aged Luke Skywalker, played by Mark Hamill, and the less said about this the better. What I will say is that every time the character talked or we got a close up of his face it looked like a video game cut scene from over ten years ago, there were major issues with the dubbing. The de-aging tech clearly isn’t there yet and I really don’t think they should be showing this much Luke Skywalker if it is going to look this bad. In a final example of horrendous special effects this episode marks Cade Bane’s, played by Dorian Kingi and voiced by Corey Burton, first appearance in live action and my word does he look terrible.

Overall, in terms of emotions and action this episode is ahead of the pack sadly the tech and the effects really stop the episode from being perfect.

Pros.

More Mando

The emotion

Bringing back Olyphant

The ending

Cons.

The effects and the look of some of the characters

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The Book Of Boba Fett: Return Of The Mandalorian

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Mando, played by Pedro Pascal, returns in search of a new ship and a new purpose.

This is a good episode, perhaps even the best of the series so far, sadly it doesn’t even feature Boba Fett, played by Temuera Morrison, thereby side-lining him in his own show. Really this episode reminds us all of how much we have missed Mando and how poor of a replacement Boba is for him. The scene in which Mando despatches a large group of enemies in a brutal fight, woefully contrasts with the moments in prior episodes when the weaker Fett gets beat up and has to use his minions to fight on his behalf.

Though I liked seeing Mando again, and found it heart warming to see him set off on a new quest to give Grogu some beskar armour, it did all feel a bit like filler. The latter half of the episode when Mando is just looking for a new ship drags on and on and eats up runtime. Moreover, the Mando storyline is only used to kill the remaining episodes until we get to the final as clearly they have realised people don’t want any more boring flashbacks from Boba.

Overall, I enjoyed this episode more than a lot of the others, but after I finished it I was sad as this really shows the failure of the series as the best episode didn’t feature the protagonist at all.

Pros.

Mando is always great

The edge and the violence is back

It actually feels like Star Wars

The new Grogu quest

Cons.

It feels like filler

It highlights how The Book Of Boba Fett has failed

It doesn’t feature Fett

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The Book Of Boba Fett: The Gathering Storm

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

An almost entirely flashback set episode, that explains how Boba Fett, played by Temuera Morrison, and Fennec Shand, played by Ming-Na-Wen, came to be associates.

For the most part this was an enjoyable episode, I liked most of the flashback stuff and it was nice to see that journey come to an end. I would have liked to see Boba do more during the reclaiming of his armour and ship action wise, but the show seems to only allow Fennec to do the action set pieces. She is cool, but this is supposed to be a Boba Fett show. That said I thought seeing Boba gun down the bikers who killed his Tusken tribe was a nice moment, and showed the character’s harder side better.

I can’t quite move on from the flashback scenes until I talk about the return of the horrible cyberpunk elements. So during the episode Boba takes a near death Fennec to a modifier to try and save her life, whilst there he is surrounded once again by bad cyberpunk cosplayers that remind you of the budget for the show. To make matters worse they play some god awful techno during this scene which feels incredibly out of place in Star Wars.

The present day stuff is all a big tease, but an exciting one at that. We see the character preparing for war with the pikes and see a familiar face return. I enjoyed all this well enough and hope that the next episode is truly crazy in order to make up for the tameness and general lameness of the series so far in most aspects.

Overall, a nice episode though it would be better if Boba actually did something and didn’t just let Fennec do everything.

Pros.

Ending the flashbacks

Teasing the war to come

Seeing how Boba became the crime lord

Boba breaking bad slightly

Cons.

Boba does nothing during the action scenes and is further watered down

The cyberpunk elements

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