The Pope’s Exorcist: Russell Crowe’s Italian Adventure On A Vespa

Summary

The Vatican’s best exorcist, played by Russell Crowe, has to travel to Spain to fight the forces of evil.

This one was strange. On the one hand it was a very competent possession film, nothing ground breaking but it delivered all of its scares as you would expect them and ticked most of the boxes of what people would want out of a possession film. However, on the other hand the film had a number of overtly comedic moments and little jokes which took me right out of the film. I am not saying there isn’t a place for levity within a scary horror film but I am saying that cracking a joke right as something spooky is happening takes the tension right out of the scene. What is worst the demonic voice they gave to the little boy who was possessed just sounds like a Cockney person who has smoked too much and is almost unintentionally funny coming out of him.

I think Crowe is a serviceable lead, however, I do think the films decision to have him speak partly in English and partly in Italian was confusing, as it would have made more sense to go one way or the other with it, as it stands it seems clashing.

Overall, a watchable possession film that doesn’t do anything new but delivers mostly in the way you would want it to.

3/5

Pros.

It is serviceable

It has a few good scares

Crowe anchors the film well

Cons.

It is unintentionally hilarious at times

It forces in awkward jokes that derail the tension

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The Hard Life And Times Of Clownie Volume 1: The Struggles After Clown College

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Clownie finally gets a feature.

So this film is the full adaption of the Hey Bro short I reviewed a while back and I have to say in a lot of ways this film is a step up. Everything that was enjoyable about the original short is here in spades and the film does justify its need for a longer runtime.

I liked that we got to explore the characters a lot more and learn more about their lives. I think the added character work added a nice new dimension to the world of the film and made me care more about these characters. As I was watching I found myself quite often relating to the characters I think they certainly feel more realised here and that is very much a good thing.

The one area in which I would criticise this film, however, is in terms of its pacing. I thought that the second act was overly long and at times felt like it was padding for time. This is a shame as the first and third act both move along at a nice place and are very enjoyable, it is just the slow down in the middle that hampers my enjoyment of the feature more broadly.

Overall, a good expansion, but the slow second act really bogs it down.

4/5

Pros.

The character work

Expanding the world

It justifies its existence

Relatable

Cons.

A slow second act

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Polite Society: Martial Arts And Uncomfortable Relationships

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A wannbe stuntwoman, played by Priya Kansara, becomes convinced her sister, played by Ritu Arya, is marrying a baddie.

In a sense I really wanted to connect with this film as I often do try to give British films the benefit of the doubt, but in all honesty this film just didn’t jive with me.

I think there are certainly some entertaining parts to it, and the fight scenes are impressive for what they are but I do think in the end the issues outweigh the positives.

The main issue I had with this film is that tonally it is two separate films. The first half is much more of a comedy about a girl struggling to accept that her sister is moving on with her life and then the second half is full of vaguely incestuous clones and kidnapping scenes, they don’t align at any point and at others feels very much at odds with one another.

To make matters worse the lead character isn’t likeable. Throughout most of the film the character comes off as incredibly possessive towards her sister, and thinks that it is okay for her to interfere and mess with her life doing worse and worse things to try and get the outcome she wants. The film justifies this in the end by having her being proven right to be so involved in her sister’s life, but throughout the film she just comes across as a busy body.

Moreover, I don’t know if it is just how I red it but there is a subtext to this film that is quite depressing and sad. In a sense the second half of the film could be read as a metaphor for mental illness and the sister fully falling into delusion, as the film likes to remind us she has an overactive imagination. In this sense the ending then develops something of an uncanny and almost unsettling quality but perhaps that was just how I made sense of the two drastically different tones within the film.

Overall, the tone of this film was all wrong and the main character was unlikeable.

2.5/5

Pros.

The fight scenes were good

It was nice to see a British film in the multiplex

It has a charm to it.

Cons.

It has pacing issues

It is tonally a mess

The main character has a God complex

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Scream VI: A Triggering Opening Sequence

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Woodsboro gang move to New York.

To get right into spoiler territory, I don’t know how I feel about no one, of importance, dying in this instalment. On the one hand I wouldn’t have wanted to see Gale, played by Courtney Cox, meet her end in a film without Sidney, played by Neve Campbell, but on the other the amount of stab wounds the cast take and survive beggars belief. You really have to suspend your disbelief with this one as in some scenes the characters are stabbed repeatedly and given injuries that would surely kill them, only to be fine enough for a kiss at the end of the film.

Adding to my issues with the film I don’t know if this instalment did enough to justify its existence. As I just don’t think having the family come to avenge the death of one of the killers from the previous film is enough of a reason to make a sequel, especially as it has been done by the franchise before. I did like however that they are continuing with the question of whether Sam, played by Melissa Barrera, will become a slasher just like her dad. I think that is a really interesting angle that I would like the next film to focus on.

In terms of performances the central cast were all fairly strong. I do think that Jenna Ortega is starting to upstage Barrera a little bit and may end up fronting the franchise a little ways down the line. Speaking off I did feel weird watching a Scream film without Neve Campbell, it didn’t feel right and I hope she comes back for the inevitable sequel.

Overall, an enjoyable sequel for the most part, but one that doesn’t completely justify its own existence.

4/5

Pros.

The meta commentary

The opening kill with Samara Weaving

Teasing out Sam as a future killer

It feels like the most violent

Cons.

The lack of deaths feels entirely unrealistic

It doesn’t justify its own existence

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Pillow Party Massacre: A Sublime Slasher Parody

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A group of teens reunite at a remote getaway a short while after their friend killed someone because of a prank that went wrong.

No this film won’t win any medals for originality but when viewed from a brain switched off place it is surprisingly entertaining. I must state before I get into it that I have an affinity towards the slasher genre and can watch the same thing over and over again within it, as such I am more forgiving.

What I liked about this film is that it bothered to set up a mystery and build the world. When the film does reveal the killer at the end it won’t be who you are expecting it to be as the film does quite a good job of misdirecting you. The more I think of this misdirection the more I wonder whether it was a direct homage or parody of the first Friday the 13^th, small spoilers there, if so bravo.

I also liked that this film had its female characters have personalities and have conversations rather than just strip off and be hacked up. When comparing this to the film from last month Kill Her Goats the two films do a similar thing yet the focus of KHG seems to just be getting the women out of their clothes for a shower scene rather than trying to set up a world or mystery as this film does.

Overall, to me this film felt like a warm mug of soup, familiar, comforting and at times a terrific parody.

3/5

Pros.

The characters and the world

The kills and the gore, even if the effects are bad

It feels like a knowing parody of other genre films in a good way

Cons.

It is overly familiar

The characters make dumb decisions

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Assassin Club: Give Noomi Rapace More Action Roles Please

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

An assassin, played by Henry Golding, must kill his fellow assassins before they kill him.

The premise is very worn, many films have been there before and this one doesn’t change it at all, who know right where it is going and every twist and turn is completely guessable.

However, the enjoyment of this film comes from its surprisingly good performances. Noomi Rapace steals the show as her unhinged villain Falk, but the real power of her performance comes from how well and distinguished Rapace plays both Falk and her day time persona of a government agent. The duality in her performance is palpable, and you really do feel as though she is playing two different characters. Moreover, Daniela Melchior is also a very welcome addition to the cast. After impressing in The Suicide Squad a few years back I like what she did with the role here, and think that she elevated it beyond simply being the girlfriend in distress. Golding of course was a capable leading man, but I would say that Rapace acted circles around him at every turn.

Another thing to give this film credit for is it’s fight scenes. Though at times they were a little choppy the fight scenes were well done throughout and some of them felt really quite intense and bone breaking which is nice when thinking about the sea of mediocre fight scenes that exist within the action genre.

Overall, don’t watch this for something new because it isn’t . Instead it takes the familiar and repackages it in a fairly enjoyable way with good performances and strong action. Not a must see.

3/5

Pros.

Solid action

Rapace

Melchior

Cons.

Familiar

Easily guessable

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Evil Dead Rise: Some Books Are Better Left Unread

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A new family find the Necronomicon.

This was a sore disappointment for me. I had been excited for this film for a while, it was certainly one of my most anticipated of April, if not the year, but after watching it I have to say it wasn’t very good. I want to state up front that I am a big fan of the original trilogy of Evil Dead Movies and Ash Vs The Evil Dead, but I wasn’t taken with the remake from a decade ago and this I found had a lot of the same mistakes.

I think the problems of this film fit broadly into four key areas. Firstly, there is way too much fan service and nods back to the previous films, if you are going to do another quasi reboot then you have to have it stand on its own, by having all the call backs it makes people compare it to the original trilogy of films, and that is not in the films favour. Secondly, the opening sequence by the lake is dumb and should have been cut out, it has no relevance on the main plot of the film and just serves to tie up an ending tease, the book ended approach to the storytelling but done in reverse really doesn’t work. Thirdly, the first act of the film is a mess and is awfully paced. The first act feels like it goes on forever introducing us to all of these characters, who we don’t care about, it takes way too long to get into the deadite action and by that point you have stopped caring. Fourthly and finally, a lot of the scares and horror aspects of the film no longer feel fresh, they might have done had this come out a few decades ago, but there wasn’t anything here that I hadn’t seen already done to death in other films.

All that said I will give the film props for being fun and a good time from the second act onwards. Once Alyssa Sutherland’s character turns into a deadite and things start to go off the wall and into a gory spectacle things get a lot better and become more entertaining. I still wouldn’t say the scares land in the way the film wants them to but the gory spectacle of the film is at least good for a laugh.

Overall, I would leave the series here, it feels very much out of steam, if they have to do another film they should bring back old man Ash, played by Bruce Campbell.

2.5/5

Pros.

The gore

Fun with the deadites

It is watchable

Cons.

The first act is horribly paced and way too long

There is too much fan service for something that is supposed to be its own thing

You don’t care about any of the characters

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Renfield: The Role Nicolas Cage Was Born To Play

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Renfield, played by Nicolas Hoult, must do battle with both his toxic boss Dracula, played by Nicolas Cage, as well as with local mobsters.

I liked this film for the goofy fun ride it was. I appreciated the focus on Renfield and Dracula’s relationship and the ins and outs of it. I thought framing the whole thing through this idea of unhealthy co-dependent relationships was both funny and also able to generate some real insights. I have never really thought of the Dracula Renfield relationship like that before but I suppose that I haven’t really thought about it at all.

Moreover, both Cage and Hoult are terrific, Cage is as hammy and as campy as you would want him to be, he is very much playing the Bela Lugosi Dracula and that comes across in the costume design as well. Whereas Hoult really turns Renfield into a multi-layered character that you end up caring about, being both sympathetic but also heroic in equal measures. I must say however, thought I like Awkwafina in other things I thought she was miscast here. I say this because she has terrible chemistry with Hoult which would be less noticeable if the film was trying to ship them off into a relationship for most of their screen time together. Moreover, her being the straight man to all the on screen silliness just doesn’t work, what we want is for her to be reacting more to the craziness as her reactions could then be a stand-in for the audience, but instead she just keeps being stoic.

Furthermore, I don’t know how I feel about the films action. It is a horror comedy film and not an action film, yet the film does feature a lot of Wick esque fight sequences which honestly get a little tried after a while. Worse yet with the whole cockroach power up mechanic the fights end up feeling like generic superhero battles and then become lost in that sea of generic special effects. However, I do like how gory the confrontations get that makes for some good gross out moments and gags.

Overall, fun and with a good message of being your own person, but Awkwafina is sorely miscast.

4/5

Pros.

Hoult

Cage

The gore

The message about relationships

Cons.

Awkwafina is miscast

The action becomes boring after a while

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RRR: The Sun Sets On The British Empire

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Two Indian revolutionaries, played by N.T Rama Rao Jr and Ram Charan, wage war on the British Crown.

I think this film has a little bit of everything. It has epic action scenes that are both intense and beautifully shot, it has fantastic and surprisingly catchy musical numbers and a good message about standing up for what you believe in and staying true to yourself.

I think the most impressive moment of the whole film comes within the opening act wherein Charan’s character is tasked with arresting a protestor who has just smashed a picture of the King with a rock. What follows is one of the best uses of slow motion I have seen in recent cinema, coupled with the fact that the fight gets gory and isn’t afraid to let the hero get hurt, it is incredibly effective.

I also think that the two leading men have great chemistry which is really important as basically throughout the film their character become metaphorical brothers and as such the bond needs to be believable. I thought each played off the other really well and both had moments of action hero prowess as well as relatability.

The one area where I had an issue with the film, and I know that it is fairly predictable, is with the pacing and the length of the film. I understand that the film is supposed to be an epic and that entails a certain scope and runtime, but I think also that the film has a lot of filler which could be cut out in order to make it a more streamlined and enjoyable viewing experience. Take a lot of the strange romantic comedy esque moments that are placed into the second act for example they could be removed and it would better the pace of the film by a lot.

Overall, the film is fun and has a lot to enjoy in it, however, the incredibly slow pace does hurt it.

3.5/5

Pros.

The action

The two leads

It is a lot of fun

The songs

Cons.

The pacing

Sometimes there are tonal issues

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Qorin: Is Your Teacher A Demonic Summoner?

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A boarding school is turned into a portal to hell when students begin performing black arts and summoning their demonic doppelgangers.

I have a lot of love for Indonesian horror cinema, and I think that in many ways Muslim focused horror films make for a nice break away from the same old Christian tinged horror films that play every week at the multiplex. As such, I went into this with high expectations expecting another May The Devil Take You, but boy was I wrong.

This film isn’t the worst possession film I have ever seen but it is also in no way good. I would say the biggest issues the film has is that despite is premise being just different enough that it feels a little bit fresh, the way the story plays out is anything but. You have seen this film many times before and know exactly where it is going. Indeed this film clings to tropes and worn out characters as though it is too afraid to show an ounce of originality.

Additionally, the low-fi scares of the film don’t prove effective at all. Now I am not saying that low budget films, which this clearly is, can’t be scary really the opposite is true, but they do have to make an effort to do more with less and to make every shot count. This becomes an issue here as a lot of the time the effects just aren’t good enough and don’t lead to a scary scene, again it comes back to the fact that it is the same old same old, their demonic doppelgangers are in no way different to how a character from a Blumhouse movie would be and that is boring.

Overall, there is so novelty to the idea and trace amounts of originality, but the film really shoots itself in the foot by sticking far too closely to tired characters, scares and storylines.

2/5

Pros.

Traces of originality

It is unintentionally hilarious at times

Cons.

It relies way too heavily on cliches

It is bored and predictable

The scares don’t work

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