American Horror Story: Pale

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

After taking the black pill Harry Gardner, Finn Wittrock, becomes widely successful as a screen writer however, it comes at a terrible cost.

I think this is certainly a stronger episode than the premiere, in multiple ways. We can fully roll into the vampire/sea monster shenanigans now and the episode feels far more engaging because of it. We get slightly more clarity around the rules for these new monsters, though there is still enough mystery there for it to keep you guessing.

Moreover, Evan Peters and Sarah Paulson have far more of a presence in this episode and that helps things along greatly. The two really are the shining lights of the show and each time they are on-screen they easily make the show. Peters is particularly terrific this time around and I love his over the top gothic playwright character.

The family dynamic of the Gardner’s is starting to become a little irritating and needs to be ditched. The kid is a brat and the nagging scared wife who doesn’t understand what is going on and just wants to leave feels like an easy stereotype that we have already seen before too many times.

Moreover, the origins of the pale creatures is not as dark and macabre as it could have been, but it is interesting none the less.

Overall, a stronger follow up episode.

Pros.

Peters

Paulson

We get the full vampire reveal

The origins of the pale creatures

Cons.

The family element is starting to get stale

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American Horror Story: Cape Fear

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Failing screen writer Harry Gardner, Finn Wittrock, move his family to the coast for the winter in hopes of finding inspiration. However, what he finds is a town overrun by pale creatures that feast on human blood.

It has been a while since we last saw American Horror Story on our screens. Is this a return to form for the series after the so-so outing of the last season? Partially maybe, but it is not without its issues. I understand that this is a first episode, so it has a lot to set up, however, it is so slow it puts you to sleep. The pacing in this episode is way off, with the first forty minutes being fairly bland and then things livening up in the final ten or so minutes.

Another thing I think that is hurting the show somewhat this season, is that they are no leading with their strongest performers. Evan Peters and Sarah Paulson are only briefly in this episode is bit supporting parts, with the lead instead being Wittrock and Lilly Rabe. That is not to say they are bad, rather that they might have been better suited to supporting roles as they aren’t really compelling enough to act as leads.

I do like the rather obvious vampire influence over this season, though it is clear they won’t actually be vampires, instead they will be sea monsters as the theme is aliens and sea monsters for this season- at least going off the promotional art work. I think the origins of the pale creatures is set up to be interesting and I would like to see how they tie into the wider lore of the universe.

Overall, it has promise but as first episodes go this was a bit too slow.

Pros.

The pale creatures

The vampire influence

Paulson and Peters in the small doses we get of them

Cons.

The leads aren’t strong

The episode is poorly paced

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American Horror Stories: Game Over

1/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The series returns to Murder House once again but this time it seems to all be within a videogame.

This is easily the worst episode of American Horror Stories and is amongst the worst episodes of the entire franchise. Why? Where to begin.

Firstly, this episode teases us with the destruction of Murder House, it does not deliver on this and instead gives us one of the worst bait and switch endings ever, it would have been less insulting to say it was all a dream; actually what they do isn’t that far off this.

Moreover, this big episode that will have huge ramifications for the show, at least in set up in actuality it changes nothing, they couldn’t be bothered to bring most of the main murder house cast back. Really? I understand people like Evan Peters and Jessica Lange might be too pricy to return but surely the show has a budget and could have got them to come back for this special episode.

The actual plot itself whereby American Horror Story exists within the universe of the show, but also doesn’t makes very little sense. The constant twist reveals of ‘oh you thought this was real no it’s a videogame’ become so overdone that the episode comes apart at the seams and ends up showcasing the very worst writing that the series has to offer.

Overall, a painfully bad episode that could easily ruin the spin-off series for a lot of people.

Pros.

A few good scares

Cons.

It is meaningless and effects nothing

They don’t bring a lot of the main cast back

The son is awful and completely annoying

The ending sucks so much

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iCarly: iPlan A Flawless Dinner Party

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Carly, Miranda Cosgrove, cooks a meal for her new beau and his Grandmother in order to impress them- rather unsurprisingly it goes awry.

This is the definition of average. A wham bam thank you mam no thrills kind of episode. Neither the A or B plots are very good and the whole thing leaves you just going meh.

The A storyline is predictable as hell and plays off the women in competition or hating each other for the sake of it, or worse yet being territorial over a man angle to an eye rolling extent. Clearly the writers of the show were not content with the sexism of last weeks episode and needed to continue it here as well. Moreover, I find it worth noting how much of a big deal the show makes out of the fact Carly can’t cook, not just in this episode where it is plot centric. Does the show care if the male characters can cook? No. However, it does like pointing and laughing at Carly for not being able to, is it because she dared to deviate from a gender stereotype? Maybe.

The B Storyline of Spencer’s, Jerry Trainor, relationship endings felt needed. By that I mean the storyline of his relationship had run its course by the previous episode and there didn’t seem to be anywhere else they could take it, so this was inevitable. It had its wholesome moments, but I am not too sad to see it go.

Overall, the lazy sexism and poor writing makes this one of the weaker episodes of the revival.

Pros.

It is watchable

Freddy, Nathan Kress, continues to be a shining light on a troubled sea of poorly written characters

Cons.

It is sexist

It is played out

It is deeply unfunny

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What If: The World Lost Its Mightiest Heroes

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Someone is killing off Earth’s Mightiest Heroes, what would a world look like where the Avengers never formed?

The concept of this is far more interesting than the previous Star Lord episode, that is already a point in its favour as far as I am concerned.

I thought it was a little awkward how Black Widow centric this episode is considering what is going on with Scarlett Johansson and Disney in the real world, however she is not voiced by Johannsson here. I thought the mystery was actually quite well done and surprising, and much like the first episode this is a reality I would like to explore again in later seasons of the show.

The one thing I would say about this episode in a negative light is that it is the first time within the show were I have thought how limiting the ‘no new characters’ rule is. Can you imagine the finale of this episode whereby Nick Fury stands with a whole different team of Avengers to defeat Loki, maybe with some faces we have not even met yet, personally I think it would have been a hugely exciting moment.

That aside I think this is a fairly strong episode, I enjoyed the voice cast and thought everyone seemed to be having fun especially Lake Bell as Black Widow and Clark Gregg as Agent Coulson.

Overall, fun and with a dense premise rich for further exploration.

Pros.

The mystery

Bringing back scenes from The Incredible Hulk

The ending

Coulson and Black Widow

Cons.

They should have used the death of the Avengers as a spring board to introduce some new characters.

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Heels: Kayfabe

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Two wrestler brothers spar over the future of their father’s wrestling promotion.

I will open this review by saying when it comes to wrestling I am pretty clueless, I have watched parts of odd matches here and there but when it comes to understanding and appreciating the finer parts of the art and the craftsmanship I am not the one to call.

This was far more family drama driven then I was expecting, sure the premise of the show does imply that their will be some drama, but this show is packing Nashville levels of drama, which is to say a lot.

I thought in this first episode both Stephen Amell and Alexander Ludwig did a good job. Both were able to appear as the hero and as the villain at different points in the episode’s narrative, and you never quite decide which of the two brothers you want to root for. I thought the supporting cast was decidedly weaker, but it is only the first episode so maybe they will get better flushed out in the coming weeks.

I found the episode to be quite depressing especially the ending, I understand the moment is supposed to be a low point for the character and be dramatic, but it ended up really bumming me out for the rest of the afternoon.

Moreover, I struggled with the episode’s runtime and pacing, both need a lot of work in the coming weeks to make the series more digestible. Clocking in at just over an hour, this episode feels twice that, and I understand they have to get everything set up in the pilot episode but even still they should have paced it better.

Overall, I am interested in the Brothers’ struggles but I am not yet invested.

Pros.

Ludwig

Amell

The drama

Cons.

It is depressing

It is too long and poorly paced

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The Bad Batch: Kamino Lost

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Batch have to escape a sinking Kamino.

Meh.

For a season finale this is pretty bland. Nothing much happens and there is minimal action, the ending feels like more of a mid-season ending rather than the end of a season. There is no big cliff-hanger or tease to set up the next season.

I enjoyed what this episode did with Crosshair. I thought by having him not join the Batch at the end of the episode and still aligning himself with the Empire it makes him far more interesting than his brothers. I think the complexity to Crosshair’s character is one of the best things about the series as he can be both an outright villain and an antihero in equal measure.

Omega was once again an annoyance. The series is trying here to make us care about her by saying that she effectively watched the Batch grow up and that they were her only friends, but still you just don’t care. This is mainly due to the fact that she constantly makes dumb errors that are infuriating, like going back for the droid and then not really seeming bothered with him once she has saved him. I think the show would be infinitely better if it just focused on the Batch and she was not a part of it.

I was also hoping for more of a tease of what the Empire plans to do with the Kaminoians… but we get nothing.

Overall, watchable but fairly anti-climactic.

Pros.

Crosshair

It is watchable

The animation

Cons.

Omega

No action or anything special

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iCarly: iCan Fix It Myself

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Carly, Miranda Cosgrove, seeks to become a mechanic after she feels ripped off by one and wants to save the ‘life’ of her beloved car Vin Diesel.

This was a very lukewarm episode of iCarly for me. I thought the A plot about Carly trying to be a mechanic was cringe and ended up undermining the points it was trying to make. The first half of the episode focuses heavily on feminist talking points about female empowerment and Carly seizing control of her own life. Then the second half of the episode admits she was wrong to think that, that in fact she should have always just asked the man to fix it and then to push back into regression even further Carly even agrees to go on a date with him. Really guys? The sexism here is ridiculous. The moral of the episode is entirely undone by the pay off at the end.

The B plot about Harper’s, Laci Mosley, cousin faking her kidnapping is better considerably. Though the series is struggling with giving Harper something to do, I think the introduction of her cousin has greatly added to her character and given her a new dynamic to play off. I liked the build up and pay off of this plot and thought it gave Spencer, Jerry Trainor, a number of memorable moments that are also funny to watch.

Overall, I am surprised this episode got made, did no one see how deeply sexist the A plot is?

Pros.

Spencer

The B plot

A few funny jokes

Cons.

It is deeply sexist

Nearly everything about the A plot is awful

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American Horror Stories: Feral

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

After losing their child in a national park, a couple returns to begin the search anew. However, what they find is far more frightening and poses a threat to the entire country if not the world.

This was certainly one of the strongest episodes of American Horror Stories so far. I enjoyed the twist and the possibly supernatural cannibal people. I would like to see them return again at some other point within the universe, I think there is a lot more to be tapped their with regard to their mythology.

There were a number of memorable scenes here such as when the parents finally do get to meet their kid again and he tells his cannibal friends to eat them. I think the episode gets the tone just right and plays up the horror situation whilst doing it with a wink and a nod, so it is also funny.

I thought the two lead performers didn’t bring much to their respective roles. However, this is offset by the fact that returning AHS veteran Cody Fern is a riot. I enjoyed the character and thought that he was quite commanding, whilst also having just enough air of mystery to him that you never quite feel like you can let your guard down. Moreover, perhaps most importantly of all he is also the funniest, Fern’s attempt at an Australian accent is so laughably bad that you just can’t help but laugh. I find it endearing ultimately.

Overall, a fairly strong episode with an interesting new antagonist for the universe.

Pros.

The monster

Cody Fern

The kid letting his parents be eaten

It felt fresh

Cons.

It should have got to the cannibals sooner

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What If: T’Challa Became Star Lord?

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

T’Challa becomes Star Lord instead of Peter Quill, and maybe even does it better?

I think this was a very average episode. Nothing really blew me away about it, really it just feels like they are recycling the plot’s of other Marvel films for extra profits, yes with a few changes but the story structure feels much the same.

I thought the idea of space Black Panther was interesting, Chadwick Boseman has a lot of fun and it is nice to see him back in the role, even if it is bittersweet when you remember. Moreover, I thought the idea that Black Panther was in fact a better Star Lord than the one we have come to know quite amusing, I liked how even Drax liked him more.

The biggest issue with this episode is by far its plot, because once it gets past the initial charm of T’Challa in space, it is just a generic heist plot that has no stakes at all. Once the episode switches to the heist my mind just turns off, I don’t care about some McGuffin that the characters are trying to steal that likely will never come back in the MCU again.

Moreover, I thought the sting at the end about how the Peter Quill of this universe is getting on was actually more entertaining and interesting than the story we got.

Overall, though Boseman is strong the rest of the episode isn’t, and it feels incredibly mediocre.

Pros.

Boseman

The concept

Thanos but as a good guy

Cons.

The heist plot

It is very generic

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