See How They Run: The Theater Is A Dangerous Place

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The set of a production of Agatha Christie’s The Mousetrap turns into a crime scene.

For those looking for a serious straight laced murder mystery film look elsewhere. Though I am not saying this film is inherently a comedy, I do think there is a degree of metaness to the film and a commentary on the Whodunit genre more broadly, which worked well for me. Many scenes of this film almost serve as a parody of the genre’s tropes and seeks to subvert and deconstruct. I think these aspects of the film really enhance it and add a sense of quirky charm that will endear this film to a lot of people. I also think the film is very funny and frequently made me laugh as I was watching it.

The performances across the board are great but the main duo of Sam Rockwell and Saoirse Ronan are by far the best, they play off each other well and both become your favourite character at different parts of the film. If I had to edge it out I would say that Ronan gives the best performance of the two as her plucky spirit feels infectious throughout.

Overall, a fun whodunit that proves there is still life in the genre, and to a lesser extent in British cinema.

Pros.

Ronan

Rockwell

The charm

The mystery

Cons.

The pacing is a little off, it could have been shortened

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Pinocchio: Chapek Is Spitting On The Disney Vault

1/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Yet another unwanted live-action remake of a classic Disney movie.

As soon as this was announced I knew it was going to be bad, but boy howdy did I not realise just how bad it was going to be. Disney has been churning out these soulless remake for a while now and for some reason people are still watching them, maybe it is part of a masochistic new TikTok trend.

I think the worst thing about this film is that its CGI looks straight up horrible, it looks like something from several decades ago and is frequently distracting. I understand that Disney and their various studios are having a hard time with VFX talent, but come on these effects are nowhere near finished and it shows. This is probably why they dumped this on streaming because they know it wouldn’t fly in cinemas.

Moreover, this film reflects the continued downswing of Tom Hank’s career with his performance here being almost as bad as his one in Elvis earlier this year. It is not just Hanks as no one seems to be turning up for this film and it really shows, the cast just don’t care.

I won’t bother saying how this film never does anything to justify its existence as I find that to be self-explanatory.

Overall, if it is a Disney live action remake it is best avoided.

Pros.

It makes you appreciate the original film

Cons.

It has some of the worst effects of the year

The performances are awful

It feels rushed and unready for release

The pacing is noticeably bad in many parts of the film

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Beast: Man Vs Nature

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Idris Elba fights a lion.

So the survival thriller subgenre or more aptly for this the man vs beast category of the survival thriller subgenre is like I often say overstuffed. I feel like somewhere with the annuls of the films featuring in this area there must have been a man vs lion film before, however, if there was I can’t remember it or haven’t seen it as such this was a fairly new gimmick to me.

The plot is rather uninspired and very predictable, the lion terrorises the family and kills a dear family friend, played by the ever excellent Sharlto Copley, and then finally the father kills it in a hectic showdown. So much so cliched. However, despite all of this the film still feels compelling there is still enough about it to get you to care for the characters and want to see them make it out the otherside.

I thought both Idris Elba and Sharlto Copley brought a lot to the film, and both of their characters were both complex and surprisingly nuanced, whereas the kids were both incredibly whiny and irritating. I won’t spend much time ragging on child actors as they are low hanging fruit, but suffice it to say that the two we meet here are not very talented.

Overall, despite being quite generic there is more than enough to keep you entertained here.

Pros.

It is compelling

It felt fresh to me, but if you have seen other man vs lion films then it might be less so to you

Elba

Copley

Cons.

The child actors are really bad and quite distracting

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House Of The Dragon: King Of The Narrow Sea

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Daemon, played by Matt Smith, returns to court and Rhaenyra, played by Milly Alcock, hits the town.

Things slow down a gear, but that doesn’t make this a bad episode. It is far more intimate and character driven than some of the previous episode we have had and we get a far greater exploration of Rhaenyra as a character.

I enjoyed the sex positive approach this episode took and think that we should see more content like it, for too long young women have been taught to repress their sexual urges and to be chaste, old fashion sounding but surprisingly common practice, so I think it is a good thing that Rhaenyra takes what she wants here in a sexual sense.

I also thought the complete destruction of Otto Hightower, played by Rhys Ifans, was very satisfying. All season long he has been slimy so it is nice to finally see him get his, even though he will probably be back at it in the next episode.

My main criticism of this episode would be that it was the first to really struggle with its pace in a major way and that by having such a personal focus there are a few boring sequences.

Overall, an episode that does a lot right but that also struggles with its pacing.

Pros.

The sex positive approach

The destruction of Otto Hightower

The character focus

Matt Smith is great again

Cons.

The pacing

A few needless asides

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Rick And Morty: Rick, A Mort Well Lived

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Morty, voiced by Justin Roiland, gets stuck inside a videogame and Rick, also voiced by Roiland, has to go in and save him. Meanwhile Summer, voiced by Spencer Grammar, has to do a Die Hard.

I thought this was better than the first episode of the series, but was still fairly flawed in a number of ways. During the video game sequence when the various different parts of Morty decided whether they wanted to leave the game and return to the real world with Rick things got far too philosophical. I thought the idea of the using this moment to force Rick to confront how he felt about his grandson and show some warmth was a nice touch and did manage to save this side of the episode from being a total mess.

Summer doing a Die Hard was definitely the highlight of the episode for me as it was fun. Far too much recently Rick And Morty as a show has delved into deep emotional waters whilst ignoring the fun that made the show so watchable in the early days. If you just have a bunch of heavy storylines then it quickly becomes a bummer to watch. In this respect I enjoyed the dumb fun of seeing Summer mow down a group of alien terrorists and thought that it made for a nice break from the heavier elements within the episode.

Overall, a lot better than the first episode, but still not great.

Pros.

Summer doing a Die Hard

Rick saying how he feels about Morty

The ending

Cons.

It gets a bit too philosophical at times

The pacing

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Interview With Writer/Directors Jamison LoCascio and Adam Ambrosio: How Dark They Prey

Written by Luke Barnes

I recently had the chance to interview writer/director Adam Ambrosio and writer/director Jamison LoCascio to talk about their new horror anthology film How Dark They Prey which presents a collection of scary stories. In this interview we discussClive Barker, the pros of anthology horror and a bug attack. I hope you enjoy.

Q: What was your inspiration for making this film?

Adam Ambrosio: The horror movies that I grew up on. Everything from Carpenter to Clive Barker. A Lot of 70’s and 80’s horror films.

Jamison LoCascio: We were watching some great anthology films and Adam had come up with “Blood Beach,” he had come up with the war story years prior. I developed my own concept called “Encounter Nightly” and then finally, my father came to me with the concept for “Nelly” and I sat down to write what you see now with that one.

Q: What was the message of this film, did each segment have its own message or did you aim for a unified one?

Adam: I think the overall message is the strength people have in their beliefs and what dark paths they will take in their own convictions.

Q: How do you view the state of modern horror?

Adam: It’s up and down. I think people get too comfortable with something that works but there have been a few recently that I think break the mold holding on to tradition yet still giving us new characters and stories.

Q: Why choose the anthology format? What strengths do you think it brought to the project?

Jamison: It was such a cool idea to be able to work on so so many different kinds of stories that we love. I am not kidding when I say that movie that deals with WWII, aliens, monster movies, black and white retro haunted house films, slashers, and the occult…that is a dream come true for me and Adam too, I believe.

Q: A hard one, what are your top 5 horror films of all time?

Adam: Prince of Darkness, Dunwich Horror, Hellraiser, The Thing, Event Horizon

Jamison: Evil Dead 2, The Fog, Psycho, Halloween, The Ninth Gate

Q: Any funny stories from the production of this project?

Adam: YEAH! We got Swarmed by a bunch of bugs while shooting “Harrowing.”

Jamison: Yes, every shoot we had a thunder storm come in to make us wrap everyday early. Luckily, it added heavily to the suspense…of both the film and the filming.

Q: Sequel or future plans?

Jamison: We are always working on the next projects. Right now we are developing a feature film screenplay, placing a number of our most well-received short films into a VOLUME ONE: FILM VALOR, and working simultaneously on some Film Valor content for direct release via youtube including the anticipated Part 2 in our popular Battle Royale series that is a mix of Battle Royale Style video games with Star Wars. You can check that all out, and more right here: https://www.youtube.com/c/FilmValor

Q: Do you have any words of advice for aspiring filmmakers?

Adam: It’s okay to go against the grain.

Jamison: There are no paths set in making films, only the ones you make yourself in your search for fun, adventure, and to create the films you love. There is always a way forward if the goal is really just to make films. It is truly great if you can do it with people you love who want to be doing the same things too.

If you would like to check out How Dark They Prey for yourself then head on over to Amazon or search for the film on Youtube

If you enjoyed this interview, then please head over to my Patreon to support me, I offer personalized shoutouts, the ability for you to pick what I review next and full access to my Patreon exclusive game reviews. Check it out!

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How Dark They Prey: Tales Of Terror

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A series of horror anthology tales ranging from the occult to aliens.

I thought each of this films horror stories worked well and most if not all did leave me suitably creeped out and unsettled. However, for me the issue came when thinking about how did these stories work together in terms of a wider piece. I thought each worked well on their own but then jarred and clashed against each other as an anthology project. It may have been better to take one of the plots and lengthen it out.

In terms of the performances all of the performers across the board were good, so much so that it would be hard to pick who was a standout. Somewhat unrelatedly, but I thought one of the major feathers in this film’s cap was its ability to create chilling visuals that stayed with you. There were a number of scenes spread over the stories that really left a visual mark on me, that I can see in my minds eye when I think back to it. In some senses the casts performances helped to shape and form these visuals and these moments which is something that I can’t heap enough credit onto them for.

Overall, four good horror stories, but they don’t come together well.

Pros.

It is scary

The visuals

The performances

You can’t stop thinking about it afterwards

Cons.

The stories don’t flow into each other very well

The pacing

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Fall: Life Lessons For Trying Times

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Two young free climbers, played by Grace Caroline Curry and Virginia Gardner, decide to get back into it after suffering a loss that has effected them both. During this attempt the two young women find themselves trapped at the top of an abandoned tower in the middle of nowhere with no way down.

I have seen and reviewed a lot of these sort of films, the survival thriller genre seems to have a new film out every week and for the most part they are all bad. However, this one really struck a chord with me and impressed me, whether it was the fact I have a fear of heights so I felt the threat a lot more or whether it was something I hadn’t seen readily before this film certainly kept me engaged.

The performances are a mixed bag, Curry is a fairly weak lead outperformed by both Gardner and also Jeffery Dean Morgan who plays her dad and has a collective 5 minutes of screentime in the whole picture. I think the film would have been better if Gardner had the top billing and Curry was the co-star.

My two main small issues with this film were the frankly shockingly bad CGI during the first tragic climb and also the twist towards the end of the film that one of the girls had actually been dead for some time as I thought it felt lazy and done for shock value. However, in my mind both of these things are fairly minor and don’t really stop you enjoying the film.

Overall, an interesting and genuinely distressing survival film.

Pros.

The threat

The tension

The cinematography

Gardner and Morgan

Cons.

The CGI is a little patchy in places

The twist didn’t work for me

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Welcome Home Roxy Carmichael: Safety On The Shore

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A teenage goth outsider, played by Winona Ryder, finds comfort in a boat.

I can see what this film was trying to do, but it really just didn’t come together well. The two crisscrossing storylines of Ryder’s character being abandoned as a child and then her high school isolation happening side by side with the narrative flirting with the idea of unreliable narration and time could have led to great contrast, but as it turns out it doesn’t actually lead to a satisfying pay off. I would say that is the main issue with this film that it seems to think that it is far deeper than it actually is.

I think without Ryder the film would be a lot worse, as it is Ryder manages to pull the film together with enough dark energy to keep you watching until the end. You really do believe the pain that her character is clearly going through and do also feel a lot of sympathy towards her, her character is quite well constructed and layered too which is nice.

The pace of the film is a little off and I would say it could lose about 20 minutes and be a tighter and better film.

Overall, fine but with a fair number of issues holding it back.

Pros.

Ryder

It tries to do something fresh

It is watchable

Cons.

The pace

It thinks it is deeper than it actually is

The ending is quite anticlimactic

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Three Thousand Years Of Longing: Idris Elba Topless For Almost Two Hours

1/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A woman, played by Tilda Swinton, meets a djinn, played by Idris Elba, and the experience changes her life.

I think the trailers for this film are misleading, they make it seem whimsical and fun when in actual fact there is a quite a sad and melancholic tone that runs throughout the film. In that vein you are never quite sure whether anything that is happening actually is or whether it is actually Swinton’s character slipping into mental illness as such there is a quite an unsettling aspect to proceedings. It will be one of those instances where how you choose to see the film will determine what you take from it, but for me the lead’s mental illness was clear and that took away a lot of the joy for me of this film and actually made it quite sad and depressing.

Moreover, though usually Tilda Swinton is a gifted performer her performance her leaves something to be desired. This is main due to the fact that the Northern accent she is trying to do is quite frankly awful, Swinton is laying it on far too thick and as someone from that neck of the woods I can say with confidence that it is laughably bad.

The only reason that this film got a point from me is because some of its more absurdist comedic leanings made me laugh, believe me this is not a funny film by any means but there were one or two laughs that worked for me.

Overall, not an enjoyable time at the cinema.

Pros.

A few laughs to be had

Cons.

It is depressing

It is unsettling

Swinton’s accent is awful

It is badly paced