Christmas Karma: London That Famous Latin Location

Raj from the Big Bang Theory gets political.

So this was the first film I have ever watched on Plex and I have to say it was a good system, better than some streaming services for sure. I am glad this did not come out in the cinemas where I am, as I cannot imagine sitting there and watching it all in one go. I had to take breaks to get over the cringe.

So a lefty luvvie filmmaker that can seemingly only make films about people from South East Asia, think she can reverse the populist rise in the UK by making a film about immigration. She repeats all of the left wing talking points you would expect, immigrants only immigrate due to forced displacement, ignoring economic migration, that the locals are always angry white people, rather than plenty of people who welcome immigrants and want to integrate with society. This is the sort of film that makes people become right wing, by over simplifying a complex topic and present a very basic moral argument between good and bad.

Also this film decided that A Christmas Carol really needed a latina ghost, really? This film is supposed to be set in the UK, why would there be a latina ghost? The number of Latin people in the UK is miniscule. What seemed like to me was an effort in box ticking, they needed to get every group they could think of ticked off the list, they even gave some token white representation by having Danny Dyer be a dumbed down goofy version of himself to go see white people we don’t hate all of you.

The plot is your standard play on A Christmas Carol with the above politics mixed in for flavour, the issue however, is that A Christmas Carol has been done to death and mixing in some race baiting elements isn’t what the film needs to feel fresh.

Overall, I am sure the group this film was made for will like it, but sadly I was not a part of that group. My takeaways from this experience is that Plex is great Christmas Karma not so much.

1/5

Pros.

It has some unintentional comedy

Cons.

It isn’t funny on purpose

It is preachy

It over simplifies things

The moral of it is so obvious throughout

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Wicked For Good: Making Disabled People The Villain

Summary

Dorothy shows up and the Wizard Wins.

Now technically, the witch, Cynthia Erivo, wins as she isn’t really dead at the end, and Jeff Goldblum goes back to the real world in a ballon, but who’s counting.

Now this film struck me immediately as being dumb, characters will sing about how they are feeling when we can already infer that based on what is going on, on screen, they are feeling the need to explain very basic things through song. The metaphors and allegories the film tries to project are likewise basic, and lacking in nuance. It feels as though it assumes the audience are idiots. You could argue maybe they think the main audience is kids, but then why have a whole scene and song about the witch making up for lost time in the bedroom with the Prince.

Also for a film that clearly prides itself, on its DEI, look at any crowd scene and you will see every race made up, there is a strong ableist throughline in the film. So the witch’s sister is disabled, she dreams of being able to fly like she did on one magical evening, this clearly is a reference to walking as her flying is walking on air, then you have her impose laws that mean that the munchkins, little people, can not move freely as she loves one who does not love her back and she wants to restrict his movements. This makes this character outwardly a villain and is a very negative representation of disability, with the character almost going so far as to wish herself out of the chair, which is apparently bad, as it shows that disability is a bad thing rather than something to be celebrated. I don’t know about you but I think the people who made this film are bigots.

The numbers themselves are all as you would expect, it is just musical theatre the movie they all sing and dance in that same irritating talk/sing way and have the same quirky interludes. I must say in this vein Ariana Grande was particularly bad, not only were a lot of the songs, not just hers, full of very noticeable auto tune, but they also sounded exactly the same. She is supposed to be a musician and yet all of the songs sounded like the same thing rehashed, her ‘acting’ if you want to call it that was like wisely wooden, though Erivo’s was no better.

If you enjoyed the first film this one does feel like a less good more of the same version, and it feels a bit anti-climatic as the end to this two part ‘event’, however, for my money I would wager that this is not the end and that is why it did not feel bigger, I believe they will try and push it forward, not directly at first but by the time it is Wicked 5 all of the cast from these films will be back.

Overall, dumb and vaguely offensive.

0.5/5

Pros

It feels shorter than the last one

Cons.

The songs

It is dumb

It makes disabled people evil

It feels like a step back after the last film

It is still too long

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Bruce Springsteen Deliver Me From Nowhere: Wallowing In Depression

Summary

Bruce Springsteen is depressed.

That description sums up the entire two hour plus runtime of the film. You don’t need to watch it or read up any further that sums it up.

It was always going to be difficult to do a drama biopic of the life of The Boss, as unlike someone like Kurt Cobain, or Amy Winehouse he did not have the same level of demons. Yes he had a troubled relationship with his father here played by Stephen Graham, but other than that he was relatively clean. So they needed something to play up, and boy did they.

This film barely features any of Springsteen’s songs as it is doggedly set in a short time period in his life, so don’t expect many bops. Do expect scene after scene of him looking on at his childhood home as he sits in his car. The film really plays up this sense of he is mentally troubled and feeling down to such a point where it beings to feel melodramatic.

This may have worked if it was about the wider life of the man, and this was simply one of the sequences in it, quickly cut away from with a new song or event, but no the film felt the need to fixate on this period of The Boss’ life and show how he let down the girl who loved him and her little girl.

Overall, if you like Bruce Springsteen or his music this may not be for you.

2/5

Pros.

It has a few good songs, but most are absent.

It is well paced

Cons.

It is depressing

It is melodramatic

It does not feature a lot of his music

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The Sound Of Music: The Best Musical?

Summary

The hills are alive.

I am not a huge musical person I like Sweeny Todd and the Greatest Showman and a lot of the rest such as Grease leave me cold. However, I have to say after years of having only watched parts of this film, that I actually really enjoyed it.

Sure would I have liked more time focusing on the rise of the Nazis and the family having to flee instead of a needless love triangle, of course, but for what it is there is a lot of fun to be had. The songs are all catchy and instantly memorable, I am sure you already know a lot of them, and as such it is hard not to sing along here.

Julie Andrews is infectiously positive herein, and her heroine is nigh on impossible not to root for. She really does inject heart and soul to this film and truly sinks into the character, Maria feels not like some cartoonishly positive person that could only exist in media but like a real person who simply sees the best in the world and wants to help people.

This film is the sort of film one needs to reaffirm their sense of hope every once in a while. It is the very definition of comfort viewing and one that you simply must try if you have not already seen it.

Overall, a wonderful bit of escapist fun.

4.5/5

Pros.

It is fun

The songs are great

It is well paced

Julie Andrews

Cons.

I would have liked more focus to be placed on the rising Nazi threat

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Emily Perez: Drug Cartels Are Selena Gomez’s People

Summary

Yikes. That sums up the film nicely. Do we really need to say more?

So as many of you know this film has been in the headlines recently for all the wrong reasons, what it should be getting attention for is pushing questionable gender science, having course and vulgar songs that make WAP look like a children’s nursery rhyme and of course softening Mexican drug cartels that kill thousands of people every year.

It is quite funny to see the situation that critics have gotten themselves into on this one, as of course they have to support the film with a trans lead, but now as more and more things about said lead are starting to come out, these left wing critics are starting to have to say things that they may once have said was transphobic.

For me the biggest issues with this film is taste, there are a number of moments and choices in the film that feel in bad taste, simply put. To make a musical about the cartels is simply insensitive and at worst wrong. Worse yet this decision makes the tone of the film feel at times schizophrenic to the subject matter.

Overall, a bad decision all round.

0.5/5

Pros.

It is laughably bad

Cons.

The songs

It pushes bad science

The acting is awful

It has tonal problems

The pace is off

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Better Man: A Death Rattle Out Of A Rotting Sub-Genre

Summary

A man is made into a monkey.

So as I have been saying for a while musical biopics as a sub-genre are running out of steam at the box office, there are a few here or there that are making money but by and large the amount being made is less and less. In steps the bright corporate idea of making these biopics more silly and unique by doing things like shooting with Lego or as is the case here having a musical biopic where the singer is being played by a CGI monkey. I hope you can smell the desperation as I can dear discerning reader.

Honestly, there isn’t much to say about the film itself beyond its central conceit which I have already mentioned above, it is the same old same old. If you have ever seen a musical biopic before then you know the story, it is one of two. It is either rise then fall or rise, hardship, continued success, this would fall into the latter category. The two story structures are never deviated from across the entire sub-genre and really can’t be, if you are trying to tell a somewhat accurate biopic, sans the monkey, then you have to stick to reality and reality is either one or two.

If you are a Robbie Williams fan then that will help the experience as you can at least enjoy the music.

Overall, it is watchable if entirely uninspired. The monkey gimmick feels as desperate as it sounds.

2/5

Pros.

It has good songs, I am a fan of Williams music.

It has a good mostly British cast, though they are underused

Cons.

The monkey thing feels desperate

It is been there and done that

It is poorly paced

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Wicked: We Must Never Let Cynthia Erivo Ever Be Erased

Summary

A beloved musical is rushed to the big screen in order to get a supposed ‘easy’ pay day, yet any magic has long been ripped out of this film.

As the trailers showed us this was the most generic film of the year, there was no substance to it at all, the poorly disguised racism sub-plot is the sort of thing you might have seen in a children’s cartoon about thirty years ago. It is obvious and has nothing new to say on the matter if you needed more.

The acting is terrible from both of the leads, not wanting Ms Erivo to feel like I am erasing her identity, I have made mention of her name in regard to this comment on poor acting. The fact that they cast women far past their teen years to play school girls is just a bit ridiculous, but hey if they could act well it wouldn’t be a problem. Both stick out in different ways but one way to describe it would be that is abundantly clear early on that you are watching a film, they take you out of it at every turn.

Moreover, and I would say perhaps most glaringly is the fact that for the budget the effects in this film are quite iffy. There are again a number of moments where you are taken out of the film by the effects as they look poor and make you question how they made it onto the final cut, but hey I guess they are still working out the kinks with AI so it will get better with time.

Overall, a needless film in many ways but hey this is Erivo’s moment in the sun and boy is it mediocre.

1/5

Pros.

It is funny bad

Cons.

The CGI

The acting

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Back To Black: A Life Cut Short

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A biopic about Amy Winehouse

These musical biopics are all the same at this point, if things have gone as intended then this will be coming out the day after my Bob Marley review and as such I can really hammer home that point.

Much like the Bob Marley review said again this follows the same formula as all the rest, the rise, the reign and then the fall. I find that it is not until the end of the film that I begin to see any real difference beyond, nationality and music style. The difference being that with Marley the film ended on a notion of hope, he was a unifier, despite his pending death it is still a nice ending. Whereas with Winehouse the film ends on a rather black note, in a sense it becomes a tragedy and I think it is this respect that the film ends out on top of Bob Marley for the sheer fact it was able to make me feel something.

I would say that the acting was also a lot stronger here, across the board. Marisa Abela was terrific in the lead, she was both warm and likeable but could also reflect the tragic nature of Winehouse, the damaged side of her soul. I also think Jack O’Connell was very strong in his supporting role of a lad about town who ultimately proved toxic for Winehouse in the end.

This film certainly aims to be more than Marley and tries to have deeper themes and emotions, which is fine but in doing that it loses the crowd pleasing charm of Marley and makes it more of a selective experience.

Overall, an interesting biopic but one that makes for grim viewing

3/5

Pros.

The tragic nature of it

The cast

The songs

Cons.

It is depressing

The pace is off

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Bob Marley One Love: Music Conquers All

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A biopic about Bob Marley.

These musical biopics are all the same at this point, sure they are based on real life so they can’t do much to jazz it up, but it is always the same the rise, the stardom and then the fall. There is nothing to mix it up and the only difference is the songs that litter the films sound track, honestly I think we need to have a period of time without any more musical biopics to make this repetition sit better, but hey we are getting a Michael Jackson biopic next year that hopefully will address why he slept in bed with children. Hollywood doesn’t listen to its customers any more and that is why box office returns are only getting worse.

Kingsley Ben-Adir does a good job in the lead role and you buy the character. I would say he was the best actor in the piece by quite a wide margin. Lashana Lynch was fine, but mostly forgettable, one could argue that was not her fault as they didn’t give her much of anything to do.

Perhaps if I was a bigger Marley fan I would have gotten more out of it, I don’t know I just think that at this point we have seen similar narratives so many times over that it loses anything special it ever had.

The songs were good but you would expect them to be.

Overall, fine but easily forgettable.

2.5/5

Pros.

It is watchable

The songs are good

It is reasonably well paced

Cons.

It is the same the story you have heard before

Nothing is beyond average about it

They waste most of the cast

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Wish: Disney Wanted This To Bomb

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Disney fires a massive blast on their side of the culture war, sadly it has blown back on them in a big way.

I went to see this opening day, there were three other people there that is the strength of the Disney brand these days. Anyway, where to begin with this film that made me turn to my girlfriend and go no more Disney animations ever again.

Firstly the plot is beyond simplistic, like really there is no plot beyond an incredibly ham-fisted social message that everyone is special and unique and if life is ever even slightly unfair it is your duty to totally Karen out about it and that only through revolution can anything ever be achieved.

I mean I may be reading it wrong, but personally seeing how two of the only white male characters were evil and how it was the duty of everyone else to punish them it just felt like yet more preaching and like I was being told this film was not for me. If they had made the King look exactly like Donald Trump I would not have been surprised as that as clearly what they were going for, and this might play in America but outside of America audience’s don’t care for their social justice messages. As you all well know, if you have read my reviews for some time, I don’t mind a progressive message at all but when they decide to lecture and force it down the audience’s throat then it becomes clawing quickly.

The songs were not great either, which seems like an easy thing they could have gotten right, the only one that was catchy was Chris Pine’s song about how ungrateful people are. The rest aren’t terrible but they all come off feeling the same which is fine but it doesn’t do anything to sell the film.

I had heard that the ending of the film basically set up a Disney animated films shared universe, and after having seen it I question whether I was lied to. There is some implication of it but I thought it would be clearly shown, that was half of the appeal to me.

One thing I did like about the film that I will give it a half point for was the absurdity with the chickens that was a lot of fun, but sadly that was all the fun on offer in the entire hour and a half ish runtime.

Overall, another lecture from Disney

0.5/5

Pros.

The chickens

Cons

It is preachy

The real world parallel is right there for all to see and it’s irritating

The songs bar one aren’t good

It isn’t fun to watch

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