The Midnight Man: Teenagers Are Dumb, My God They Are Dumb

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Some teens summon and otherworldly entity and it ends badly for them, you know the routine.

This is nothing new and certainly won’t set the world on fire, but it does manage to develop a fairly creepy atmosphere and land a few good scares during its runtime. Solidly watchable.

I think the big issue for me with this film is how formulaic it is, truly if you have ever seen a film like this before then you will be able to predict what happens when and even what characters will say, it takes no chances and does not bother trying to reinvent the format. Moreover, the film is quite clearly low budget, no shame in that of course, and as such doesn’t have the best visual effects. This could have easily handled and done in a way to maximise the scares and also leave us guessing, however, that is not what we get. Instead there are a lot of close us and drawn out sequences of this film’s creature that look straight out of a videogame from over a decade ago.

The big draw of this film is seeing horror icons Lin Shaye and Robert Englund interact together on screen and we do get that to a degree and they certainly both help this film from being even worse though I would say they are underused. The teens who are the film’s main focus are so dull and uninteresting that it is hard to feel anything for them as such you become detached from their struggle.

Overall, Shaye and Englund do their best to salvage this generic film and they do manage to make it watchable.

Pros.

Shaye

Englund

The atmosphere

Cons.

It is generic

It is predictable

The teen leads are instantly forgettable

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Invite The Devil To Come And Play: The Devil Went Down To A Concert Hall

4.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A man’s musical obsession throws him onto a demon’s radar.

This film was genuinely quite scary and did a number of times make me jump: no easy feat. I appreciated how this film felt different from a lot of other more mainstream films about demons and tried to bring its own spin to things. In doing this the film has stayed in my mind far longer than any other demon themed horror film in recent memory has.

I thought the lead performance by Carlton Wilson was thoroughly a tour de force. Not only did Wilson sell the shut out nature of a man obsessed but he also went on an emotional journey over the course of the film, completely sold by his facial acting ability. Never once did I think of his performance as an actor playing a role rather I just saw the character.

My one slight criticism would be that I thought the film was paced a little poorly with the beginning feeling quite slow and then the rest of it quite rushed. To be both too slow and too rushed is quite a problem to have.

Overall, almost perfect.

Pros.

It is scary

Great performances

You can’t look away

It stays with you

The ending

Cons.

The pace

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28 Days Later: The Walking Dead Before The Walking Dead

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

One of the most definitive zombie films of all time. Also the film that really gave us the running zombie.

I really do think this film holds up. I would even be so bold as to say that it is up there with Romero’s Night Of The Living Dead in terms of importance within wider zombie cannon. I think so many shots from this film have become synonymous with the image of the zombie film and in that you can see the films titan like status.

I think the film does a really good job of keeping up the threat throughout the film, and no point in the films runtime do you feel perfectly comfortable as you never know when things are going to turn bad. I would classify this film more as a thriller film than as a horror as I feel it is more tense than scary, but that is just my personal taste.

The performances across the board are really strong, from a young Cillian Murphy to a deranged Christopher Eccleston and back to born survivor Naomie Harris. You will be hard pressed to find a bad performance here as even the child actor of the cast manages to be somewhat decent and not let the side down. Boyle really does a good job of picking a talented symbiotic cast that all play off each other really well.

My only issue with the film would be that after a point the zombies somewhat fade into the background and the remaining soldiers become the real villains of the piece. I think that the zombies should always be front and centre in these sort of films and that the soldiers should have a smaller presence in the film.

Overall, for the most part a classic that still holds up.

Pros.

The tension

The cast

The ending

The gore

Cons.

The soldiers get far too much focus

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The Black Phone: Ethan Hawke Takes Off His Belt

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

After being abducted a young boy, played by Mason Thames, must fight to escape armed only with the past experiences of his abductor’s other dead victims.

What is it with Scott Derrickson and dead kids? Whether its Sinister, Deliver Us From Evil or this, the director seems to use dead children as his main horror gimmick, however, I am not complaining they work incredibly well in a creepy sense. I would say the horror here is a mixture of supernatural elements along with the obvious fear surrounding a man abducting and killing kids and for the most part it works well and is incredibly effective. Moreover, for once I didn’t see the jump scares coming and the few that this film does employ made me jump each time.

I think the performance from Ethan Hawke is terrific, despite only being in the film for a short amount of time his character’s impact is felt in all areas and Hawke really does a good job of bringing The Grabber to life and rounding him out as a character. I also think Thames does a good job as the lead, which is saying something as usually child actors give distractingly bad performances, however, that was not the case here.

My only complaint would be that the sub-plot surrounding the Sister, played by Madeline McGraw, and her prophetic dreams feels a bit too filler like for my tastes. I suppose it does bare fruit in the end as it results in the police finding the boy, however, all the scenes of her on her knees calling out to Jesus feel almost a little silly.

Overall, a very enjoyable horror film boosted to no end by Hawke.

Pros.

Hawke

Thames

The scares

The ending

Cons.

The sub-plot with the sister feels like filler

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Watcher: The Moral Of The Story Is Don’t Wave To People Who Watch You Randomly

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A young woman, played by Maika Monroe, and her partner, played by Karl Glusman, move to Romania after the latter gets a job offer. However, during their time their women start getting killed and the lead finds herself facing more and more danger.

Other than her partner not being evil, despite being a dick, this film has little surprises in store. For the most part everything happens as you would expect it to in a thriller film and the mystery of what is going on is not much of one as it is incredibly obvious. The film does try and throw a few jump scares at you especially towards the end but they don’t land as they are blatantly signposted.

However, despite being obvious I do think this film has merit. It is incredibly tense and gripping and you can’t look away throughout it, It is always nice when a film can keep my attention. Moreover, Monroe continues to highlight what an unsung talent she is here landing another great and strongly compelling lead performance. I think the pros for this film just about outweigh the cons.

Overall, a fine thriller film made better by solid tension and a great lead performance from Monroe.

Pros.

The tension and suspense throughout

Monroe gives a really strong performance and conveys the stress and fear the character would be feeling in that situation in a very realistic way

The ending feels therapeutic

Cons.

It feels very familiar at times

Most the twists and reveals feel blatant and obvious.

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Abandoned: Straight Up Slop, Hard And Lacking Nourishment

1/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Yet another horror thriller film about post-partum depression.

How many times are we going to be served the same slop? Is there supernatural goings on or does the lead character have post-partum depression, and or is the baby possessed or does the lead have post-partum. We have seen it so many times before and frankly I am becoming agitated with the generic storylines that keep making it into horror cinema, the Babadook did the idea well and all the films that have come after it have been bargain basement knockoffs at best.

What’s more I am beginning to question whether Emma Roberts can act or whether she simply gets roles because of who her aunt is. We have all seen and enjoyed Wild Child, Adult World and American Horror Story but outside of those productions Roberts seems to be phoning it in, unable to communicate any kind of emotion at all in any of her performances.

The mystery here isn’t a mystery if you have ever watched a horror film or a thriller before, it is just mind-numbingly obvious.

Overall, Roberts is slumming it for an easy pay check.

Pros.

It is watchable, it is not offensively bad.

Cons.

Roberts is awful

The mystery is entirely predictable

You have seen this film before

It is not scary or thrilling

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Crimes Of The Future: Where We Are All Heading

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

In a future where humans are evolving to eat plastic, a war is being fought over what makes someone human as well as notions around monstrosity.

Honestly this film will not be for a lot of people. I myself had a fair amount of issues with it such as: it was far too long, it sometimes came across as pretentious and smug and thought it was a bit more intelligent than it actually is, and of course there is a scene where you see a child’s penis. No scene in any film should show a nude child, just no.

However, despite that opening painting a rather damning picture, I don’t think this film is all bad and I do think that there are some trace amounts of greatness in here. In many ways this can be seen as a traditional Cronenberg film, or certainly as the director returning to his roots. The body horror aspects are all very inspired and well done and as such the film stands out in the modern horror landscape, however, there are a few times wherein the gore and the viscera became a little too much for me; what can I say I don’t like live surgery scenes and there are a lot of them here.

Moreover, I think the performances across the board were also terrific. This is highlighted with gusto by a very game Viggo Mortensen and a surprisingly unsettling Kristen Stewart. I think that the characters and world created are so intriguing that it allows the film to get away with some of its worse sins. I also really enjoyed the originality of the premise as I felt like I hadn’t seen this before.

Overall, very much a film made for a niche audience, but one you should experience for yourself all the same.

Pros.

The performances

The world

The premise

Cons.

It is too long and at times overly pretentious

Showing child nudity

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Dashcam: Triggering Libs And Running From Demons

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Annie Hardy, played by Annie Hardy, live streams her travels to England wherein she comes into some demonic trouble after pretending to be a food delivery driver.

I had been excited for this film for some time, then I read that some cinemas in the UK were banning screenings of this film as it was so offensive, naturally this made me want to see it more even though it proved to most likely just be a marketing tool, and now after seeing it I would say it mostly lived up to my expectations.

I don’t think this film is a homerun in the same way Host was, I think there is a lot to like for sure but it is not without its issues. My main issue with the film was the fact that the shaky cam got a bit too much at times with it going here there and everything to the point that it was hard to see what was going on. Moreover, the film is further made hard to follow by the fact that it never gives concreate answers to anything that is happening and you don’t know what is going on a lot of the time.

That said, I do think this film is scary and has a number of good scenes that stick with you after watching. The abandoned world of night time England made for a refreshing setting and also somewhat of a novelty.

Hardy’s lead is supposed to be unlikeable, I would assume, to give you mixed feelings as she comes into trouble. On the one hand you want to see the monsters get her but then again you also sympathise. I think there is some commentary trying to be communicated through that depiction within the film but it is not strong enough that I could tell you what it is.

Overall, a strong and refreshing horror film only held back by too much shaky cam and a lack of concreate answers.

Pros.

Strong scares

A novel and refreshing setting

The tension

The ending

Cons.

Too much shaky cam

It is never clear what is going on

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Men: Too Art House For Its Own Good

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A young woman, played by Jessie Buckley, goes out to the British countryside for a few weeks to emotionally recover after the death of her abusive husband.

I thought this was a mixed bag of a film.

On the one hand I appreciated that this film felt fresh, and tried to do something new rather than repeating the same old same old as a lot of new horror releases do. Moreover, I also enjoyed the distinctly British feel to the horror, it reminded me of classic British horror films like The Wicker Man and early Hammer fare. I also thought both lead actors, Buckley and Rory Kinnear, were very strong in their respective roles and really sunk into their characters.

However, on the other hand I thought the third act had major issues and became too convoluted and pretentious for its own good. Once you get to the moment in the film where it is a series of live births then you know the film has gone off the rails. I am all for experimental art house indie horror fare, but if anything this felt too far in that vein. It is really not surprising at all that this film did not play well with general audiences. In addition, thought I applaud the social message the film was trying to convey I thought that the way in which it was done was a little too on the nose and heavy handed, as a result the script can at times feel strained. Furthermore, I thought the use of the green man and the folk horror motif felt a little generic and played out, the genre space has featured a lot from this aesthetic recently and as such this film needed to do more to make its folk horror stand out, it didn’t do that.

Overall, an original and very British horror film that certainly won’t be for everyone.

Pros.

Buckley and Kinnear

The originality

The British feel

Cons.

The entire third act is a mess

It is far too niche and art house for its own good

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Stranger Things Season 4 Volume 1: The Netflix Issue

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Hawkins gang are back for a series that feels forced and altogether needless.

Personally, I believe that the end of the last season was the perfect place for the series to end, the big bad of the Mind Flyer was defeated, the kids were going in different directions and the whole things had a very conclusive feel to it that would have worked well if it had been the end of the show. However, Netflix realising they don’t have much else decided to string it along for two more seasons.

I won’t sit here and tell you this season is bad, because that isn’t true there are some good moments here and there, there are just now also a lot of issues. The worst issue in my mind is the double whammy of having each episode go on for far, far longer than is necessary and also splitting the season in two, in a desperate attempt to keep people subscribed for longer. The episodes are at times off putting in their length and the binge as a whole this time around really asks a lot of you.

I enjoyed the body horror and the clear Nightmare On Elm Street inspiration here, however, I thought a number of the sub-plots either didn’t work or made no sense. The satanic panic idea that the Hellfire club some of the boys join being viewed by the towns people as a satanic cult just makes them all look really dumb, I understand this was a genuine thing that happened but still it makes no sense that the kids parents would actually go along with it. Worse yet the early season sub-plot about Eleven, played by Millie Bobby Brown, getting bullied just feels entirely needless. The first few episode progress incredibly slowly and the bullying subplot and several of the other teen angst directions they try and go in don’t work and feel like filler. You fill find yourself going please just get to it at times.

Overall, I am not saying it was a bad collection of episodes but I am saying this time around it felt far less needed and far more forced, which of course hurt the show.

Pros.

Steve and Robin

Some fun to be had

The more overt horror feel

Cons.

Needless subplots that feel out of place

The pacing and episode length