The Cleansing Hour: The Hottest Live Stream In Town

The Cleansing Hour is a horror film directed by Damien LeVeck. The plot focuses on a live stream exorcist Father Max (Ryan Guzman), who pretends to fight the forces of evil and rid the world of demonic forces. However, one night, on a stream, rather unexpectedly it all becomes far too real and Father Max comes face to face with the Devil himself.
This was an unexpected treat. I recently joined back up with Shudder to watch Anything For Jackson, and as I have it for a month I thought I would check out some of their other newer offerings as I already had the service earlier in the year. As such I stumbled across this film, I went in with low expectations of vapid teen focused fare and walked away genuinely surprised by one of the best twist endings I have ever seen in a horror film. The ending I am still thinking about now, well over a week after I watched the film.

I enjoyed how the demon fed of the secrets and lies, this resulted in slow drip-fed character development and an exploration of the character’s world and inner motivations. This made me care about the characters and made me invested in their story and survival. Likewise, I thought Guzman was a strong lead, the wayward priest who has fallen to the dark side but who still longs for a more noble cause is a role he plays well; in this he adds new emotional depths to the standard character architype and adds his own spin.

Overall, this is a horror gem that you can’t let pass you buy.

Pros.

The ending

The twist

Guzman

The character development

A novel new approach that felt, at least to me, very original

Cons.

None

5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Anything For Jackson: Demons Are Surprisingly Flexible, Who Knew They Had Yoga In Hell

Anything For Jackson is a horror film directed by Justin G. Dyck. The plot follows an elder couple of devil worshippers who kidnap a pregnant women to use as a bargaining chip in the demonic resurrection of their dead Grandson.

This film really is a testament to the use of practical effects. The demons in this film are genuinely menacing, more so than anything I have seen in recent memory, why? Well because they seem all too real. The main two demons that I would like to draw attention to are the tall ghost demon, I like how they played around with the size, and of course the contortionist main demon who quite frankly was unlike anything I have ever seen before in a horror film- truly chilling.

I enjoyed the empathises this film placed on creating scares through its atmosphere. The film manages to a have a few good jump scares that don’t feel manufactured and that come about organically because of the tense atmosphere, the early resurrection of the bird would be a good example.

My issues with the film are only slight. Firstly, the first act is too slow, I understand it is establishing a lot of things, but it does become a slog after a while, luckily the film quickly rectifies this. Secondly, the central couple were fine but did not blow me away, anyone else could have played those roles.

Overall, this is a very strong, very original horror film that you need to see as it is trying something new and different and pulling it off to great effect.

Pros.

The demons

The scares

The ending

The atmosphere

Cons.

The first act

The main couple were bland

3.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Blood Vessel: If There Is One Thing We Know It Is That Nazi’s Love The Occult

Blood Vessel is a horror film directed by Justin Dix. The plot sees a group of survivors adrift at sea during the closing days of WW2, they have abandoned hope of being rescued that is until they find a deserted Nazi war ship pass them by.

This film is a perfect example of subverting expectations in a smart way. When I first put this film on, I thought that it was going to be a ghost ship and that one of the survivors would probably go crazy and start hunting down the rest, turning the film into a sea-based slasher film. However, there is a reveal midway through the film, that I won’t spoil as I think it is worth seeing fresh, that totally takes things in another direction.

The lore of said reveal is quickly set up and is surprisingly in-depth, the film manages to tell us a lot about what is going on and who is doing it without giving us a lot of boring slow exposition. The gore and the kills are strong, gore fans will be pleased to hear, with an excellent and bloody final showdown to boot; the ending itself perfectly sets up a continuation of the horror.

My one complaint would be that none of the characters were particularly interesting and for the most part felt like standard war time cliches.

Pros.

The horror

The reveal

The lore

The ending

Cons.

The characters are all quite forgettable

4/5

Reviewed by Luke

Poltergeist: Don’t Trust Trees

Poltergeist is a horror film directed by Toby Hooper. The plot follows a family who become terrorised by otherworldly beings known as ‘the tv people’, eventually these entities end up kidnapping the daughter of the family Carol Anne (Heather O’ Rourke), and the family must do all they can to get her back.

This is an 80s icon of horror cinema for a reason, and that reason is a mixture of nostalgia and that Spielberg magic in its prime, though he did not direct it he was heavily involved. There is something almost family friendly about this film, though maybe that is me watching it with a desensitised 2020 outlook, but beneath that wholesome veneer is something much darker which captivated my interest.

I did not find the film scary as a whole, I only found the tree scene and the clown scene to be unsettling, however, I can see that a viewer watching it in a contemporary setting might have found it very scary; the effects that look dated and goofy now would have been good for the time. That said I enjoyed the over the top effects, like the scene where the man’s face comes off in the mirror, they made me laugh and I was certainly feeling the 80s charm of them.

I enjoyed what the film did with its bait and switch ending, making you think it was all over and that what you were watching was a happy ending monologue to show the family all safe, but then it subverts that and shows you that the danger is actually not over at all. I thought that was a very clever thing to do narrative wise, as it makes the actual ending feel very surprising.

Overall, maybe more tame by today’s standards there is still more than enough on show within the film to show why it deserves its iconic status within the horror genre.

Pros.

80s horror charm

A few scary scenes

A clever ending

Cons.

It is not very scary

It has pacing issues, especially in the second act

3/5

Reviewed by Luke

The Haunting In Connecticut: A Whole New Fluid To Be Disgusted By

The Haunting In Connecticut is a horror film directed by Peter Cornwell. The plot sees a family move into a home that use to be a funeral home where the mortician performed evil rituals on the dead to boost his son’s supernatural gift, naturally after they move in things start getting out of control quickly and the spirts start attacking the family.

I remember watching this film when I was younger, and I remember being scared for days afterwards. So, when I decided to revisit recently I went in with high expectations, and I can safely say they were not met.

The scares are all fairly tame, the two ‘scary’ parts of the film are the flashback scene where the bodies are mutilated and the ectoplasm scene, the latter is more fascinating as a concept than it is scary. For the most part the scares are just the usual obvious jump scares that blight most horror films these days, they are incredibly obvious and have no impact at all.

Secondly, and stick with me on this one, I don’t like how up the churches arse this film is. Yes, I understand that religion and God will play a key role in these sort of films as they are fighting demons, but in something like The Conjuring 2 you don’t see them stopping to pray every 5 seconds and having a character (the mother), who’s whole purpose is to spout about how great the church is and how we all need to have faith; it felt like I was watching Gods Not Dead or something alone those lines. My issue to clarify is not that it is in the film, it is the total lack of nuance or subtly with it.

Overall, though the body mutilation scenes did creep me out a bit, I can’t recommend this film as the scares just aren’t very good. They are the by the numbers jump scares that you would expect from some of the lazy Blumhouse fare, with that in mind this fails as a horror film.

Pros.

A few creepy scenes

The idea of ectoplasm and the way the film explains it

Cons.

The writing lacks subtly

The scares don’t work

The characters aren’t sympathetic and are caricatures

1.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Annabelle: Demons Patiently Wait On Lifts, Respect Social Distancing

Annabelle is a horror film directed by John R. Leonetti, serving as the first spin off film of the wider Conjuring Universe. The plot of this film focus on Annabelle, the breakout star of the first Conjuring film and goes a ways to explain how she ended up in the Warrens private collection; though to understand that you will have to watch all 3 Annabelle films.

I remember seeing this film a long time ago and I remember it being generic and boring. However, the other night, perhaps as a result of a masochistic feeling, I decided to revisit it and see if it was as bad as I remember. It is bad, definitely the weakest of both the Annabelle trilogy and the Conjuring Universe as a whole, but it is not terrible.

The only pro I have for this film is the basement life scene, when Mia (Annabelle Wallis), first sees the demon and she gets stuck in the lift. This I think is easily the best scene of the film, both in terms of scares and execution as it actually manages to feel tense.

The issues with this film for me are twofold. Firstly Annabelle Wallis should not be cast in anything ever, why is she? She can’t act and her name being associated with anything is a sign of poor quality, The Mummy, King Arthur Legend Of The Sword, Tag, I could go on. Wallis seems incapable of showing even the slightest amount of emotion in any sense, and to call her wooden would be a disservice to wood everywhere.

Secondly there is no third act in this film. Things just plod along in the usual investigative way these films do and then bang its over. There is no final standoff between Mia and the Demon, no, instead she almost throws herself out a window, but then she doesn’t and someone else does; wow gripping stuff there.

Overall, though this film isn’t as terrible as I remember it being it is still bad, not worth your time and easily the weakest of the Conjuring films; takeaway stop casting Annabelle Wallis.

Pros.

The lift sequence

Cons.

Annabelle Wallis

There is no third act

The doll really isn’t all that involved

There is a lot of aimless plot that goes nowhere

It does not justify its existence as a spin off

1/5

Reviewed by Luke

House Of The Witch: Is Being Killed By A Witch Worth A Quick Shag?

House Of The Witch is a horror film directed by Alex Merkin. The plot follows a group of kids who go to a house in their neighbour hood that is supposedly haunted, where others have gone missing in the past, to have a kissing party on Halloween; rather unsurprisingly things go wrong, and the teens start dying.

So yes the plot of this film is deeply generic, as are the cast. However, there is something about this film that I can’t quite put my finger on, it has a diamond in the rough sort of quality to it. I think a lot of this comes from the film’s scares. Even though there are a few jump scares, which are automatic marks down in my book, the scares for the most part are effective and well done. I applaud the films horror it is by far its strongest element.

In the beginning the witch effect, which are noticeably cheap looking bothered me and took me out of the film, but as it went on I started to enjoy it and found that it added to the charm of the film.

The twist at the end of the film leaves you scratching your head a bit, not because it is confusing as it is heavily foreshadowed, but because of the way it is shot. The final sequence itself is quite jarring, as the girls face changes somewhat and you are left saying “wait what who is that?”.

Overall, though you have seen many films like this before there is still a rough charm to the film and the scares are good, not great by any means but definitely passable.

Pros.

The scares

The effects

The witch herself

Cons.

The twist ending

It is deeply generic

3.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

Annabelle Creation: Demons Love A Good Chair Lift

Annabelle Creation is a horror film directed by David S. Sanberg, serving as both a prequel to the first Annabelle film as well as adding to the Conjuring Universe as a whole. The plot this time around serves to explain the origins of Annabelle the doll, showing how the possession occurred.

This is the best film in the Annabelle trilogy by far, as it is actually scary. I enjoyed the tragic reveal of Annabelle’s creation and I think it is smart to actually show us the demon controlling the doll rather than just the doll itself. I am surprised to note that the demon actually looks like how you would imagine a demon to look, not like the Conjuring Universe’s other demons that are basically just people with yellow eyes.

Personally, I think the scarecrow scenes where the scariest and best done of the whole film.

I think by and large the film wastes most of its cast, with veteran actors like Miranda Otto brought in to do very little. Though it does continue Lulu Wilson’s rise in the horror genre, she has been in 3 ‘good’ horror films to date and is shaping herself to be a generation z scream queen for sure.

I thought the ending was clever, tying the end of the prequel into the start of the first film it is not a new idea but it is effective here and it helps us to further understand the timeline.

Overall, though a series of clever decisions this film proves itself to be more than just a collection of jump scares.

Pros.

The scarecrow scenes and showing us the demon

Lulu Wilson

The ending

It does what it says on the tin, it explores Annabelle’s origins and it does it well

Cons.

The cast bar Wilson is wasted

4/5 Reviewed by Luke

Demons: Never Put On A Conveniently Placed Mask

Demons is an Italian horror film directed by Lamberto Bava. The plot sees a group of cinema gowers become the victim of a centuries old mask that turns people into demons.

This is the film that killed the giallo subgenre, the Americanisation is clear to see, this film owes more to films like The Evil Dead then it does something like The Bird With The Crystal Plumage, which is not in and off itself a bad thing, it is just noteworthy.

My main complaint with this film would be that the plot felt confused, I wasn’t quite sure what it was saying most of the time, a lot seemed to be going on and not much of it made any sense. That said I did like where the film ended things teasing a world overrun by these demon creatures and a human safe haven/resistance.

It feels very 80’s in approach, with the music and the tone, but it also feels very forgettable as a result. It blends in with a sea of other 80s based slashers and supernatural affairs. The acting is also quite so so, no one is memorable and most seem to be over acting in an effort to get noticed.

Overall, a sad death of a subgenre

Pros.

It has a promising ending

Cons.

It feels generic

The acting is bad

It has lost touch with its roots

It is hard to follow

1.5/5

Reviewed by Luke

The Conjuring 2: A Random Elvis Sing Along Interlude

The Conjuring 2 is a horror film directed by James Wan. The plot this time around focuses on the Warrens (Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga), involvement in the Enfield Haunting. As the Warrens head to London, they are stalked by a mysterious demonic nun, who seems intent on Ed’s death.

Personally, I find this film scarier than the first. Hilariously bad English accents aside, this film is genuinely frightening, the crooked man is by far my favourite part of the film and the segment with him in it is really well done; still waiting on that spin off film.

I found Valek the demon nun scary at first, but then I think it gets over exposed. Also a lot of the horror this time around is jump scary related which gets very stale very quick, see a dark corner, hear a drop in the music, here comes a jump scare.

I still find the Warrens to be likeable protagonists, Wilson and Farmiga are charming leadings. They have their personalities expanded a bit more here which proves to be sweet, but it also serves to derail the tone of the film. Of course I am talking about the Elvis scene, where midday way through the film, as the demonic activity is still going strong, we get scene where Ed just starts playing a guitar for the whole family and singing. Why? Any tension that was there in the film is immediately taken away.

Overall, the world and new horror elements (The Crooked Man), makes this worth checking out, there are some odd choices that ruin the film somewhat, but it is still worthwhile.

Pros.

The Crooked Man

The Warrens are still very likeable

Quite a few good scares

Cons.

The Elvis scene

The use of jump scares

3.5/5

Reviewed by Luke