Cinema Issues: The Postmortem Of Doctor Who

In this cinema issues article we are dissecting the first season of New, New Who and doing a post mortem to see what went so badly wrong with it.

So lets get something out of the way right quick, the series is in a bad way, I don’t care if you think it was some of the most stunning and brave Who ever, the ratings are a slow death. The Legend Of Ruby Tuesday and another episode this season both posted record low viewership numbers for the show, some of the lowest in the shows history. Look it up. Things are bad, and there is even talk that the filmed season batch of episodes may not get released as the BBC debates what to do with them, likely they will get released and the show will just be put on ice come this time next year.

Anyway, as the BBC starts to question everything and panic about its in development Who spin-offs, we will look at what went wrong with these episodes.

I think the main issue a lot of people had with these season was that fundamentally it wasn’t Who, never before have I seen the Doctor have so many dance numbers and act more like a local tiktoker trying to make it big than an alien. In addition the fact that the Doctor called everyone ‘babes’ constantly didn’t make it feel like Who it made it feel as though the Doctor had suddenly become another person.

Moreover, the series was heavily political with a number of controversial hot button issues forced in, just for the show to keep a desperate hold of its increasingly radically progressive audience. Some of it didn’t even make sense like when those people who not be saved by the Doctor because he was black and would rather die, what horribly on the nose message was that supposed to be pushing as it felt like a straw man argument. These ideas where repeated over the course of the season, the issue with clearly taking a side politically is that it then alienates your audience and makes you start to loose chunks of people. It is always better to present two sides and let the audience make up their own mind.

Furthermore, who at Disney or the BBC thought it was a good idea to allow cast and creators to attack the fans, whoever it was I would say is the most responsible for the bad feeling and reception to this season. This is mainly due to the fact of actors telling fans to screw off and then being shocked when their show has bad viewership, you do not treat your fans like that you just don’t. Yet these people look down on their fans and think they don’t need them, how wrong they are.

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The Beast: Love Is An Often Remembered Thing

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A love story is tested against the ages.

This film is not going to be what people expect, in one sense it is a science fiction dystopian film and in another it is a romantic tragedy. The idea of the romance that is central to this film is one that is both engaging, but also deeply unsettling, one could view this film as a horror quite easily.

Lea Seydoux gives a terrific performance as a woman who wants love but can’t remember what it is and is haunted by that fact, she obsesses over prophecy when it is her own memory she’s trying to regain. George Mackay gives an often disturbing performance whilst maintaining a great deal of screen chemistry with Seydoux. If I had to single one out for praise it would be Seydoux she is the anchor of the film.

It is worth saying that this film is not for everyone it is long, bilingual, and it deals with a lot of heavy and complex themes and subject matters. At close to 2 1/2 hours the film can at times suffer from significant pacing issues, however in my opinion these issues are made-up for by the engaging plot which is easily one of the most intellectually stimulating of recent memory.

The ending of the film perfectly subverts expectations, with the audience being totally in the dark as to where the film will leave off. I found the ending both tragically comedic and also strangely affecting.

Overall, a film that will not be to everyone’s taste but one that is well worth the watch if you are a fan of thinking science fiction. This is not for the faint of heart.

Pros.

The themes and ideas explored

The performances

The ending

The dark comedy of it all

Cons.

Pacing issues

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A Quiet Place Day One: You Don’t Care How Many Humans Die Just As Long As The Cat Is Okay

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

We learn how the world went silent.

I don’t think there was a need for this film beyond corporate greed. What worked so well about the first film was the layers of mystery it had, we didn’t need to know how the world went silent and that is something this film cannot reckon with.

Moreover, where in the other two films the thrill of it was the hunt, will the monsters here them, will they catch them? Whereas here people are just being killed in seconds there is no build up anymore it is just happening and it is ultimately boring.

The characters of the film are some of the most poorly realised I have seen in a long while. Whereas the first film had the family that you cared about, this film has a dying woman, Lupita Nyong’o, her cat and a hysterical man, Joesph Quinn. Whilst Nyong’o is probably the best of the grouping she isn’t given much of anything to work with and her character is mainly just a person obsessed with their own morality which could have been made interesting but isn’t. Her quest to get some pizza in the hellscape is supposed to be charming and relatable but rather it is just irksome. Quinn’s character is much, and I mean much, worse he basically spends most of the film following around Nyong’o like some sort of creep, and then constantly cries and breakdowns because he doesn’t know what to do. The character is little more than hysterical crying. They try and give him a bravery arc but even by the end he is just the same.

The cat is wonderful and you care about it but that’s it on the likeable character front.

Overall, a needless sequel that is clearly the inferior for having lost the talent of the first two.

Pros.

The cat

Nyong’o is trying her best but they give her nothing

Cons.

It is boring

It is anti-climatic

It has serious pacing issues

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The Acolyte Episode 5: It Would Have Been Better If The Sith Had Killed Every Character

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A lot of characters die, the show wants you to care but frankly you’re happy to see them go.

So this was the big action episode with all the fights and the lightsabers that had been teased for a long time. If you are the kind of person who just seeing some lightsabers is enough to make you happy, then good news you’ll love this episode, however if you require more substance than I can safely say you will be disappointed. The action choreography was weak, they have clearly taken influence from martial arts films and what not and that is fine but some of the actors they have trying to pull off these moves look like there is no way in hell they actually could. The action is pretty fake looking at times too, it looks like something you might see on a better than average Youtube channel that recreates movie fights, not the sort of thing you expect for a show with 180 million dollar budget.

Moreover, as I said in the summary a bunch of characters die, and you either feel indifference or kind of want them to. The show and its terrible writing has done such a bad job of making you care about any of the Jedi, even at sometimes making you hate them for how not like Jedi they are, that when they die it has the wrong emotional effect. I also thought it was cringe as hell that it was only the Padawan that gave the Sith a fight, as the rest of the Jedi’s were easily chopped down and they were experienced Knights, but because the Padawan is a know it all girl boss, played by Dafne Keen, she could go toe to toe with the Sith fighter. It is silly and stupid and the perfect reflection of modern Star Wars

Oh the twist, the dude from The Good Place is the Sith, yes that’s right folks the most obvious and laziest choice is the correct one. Everyone guessed from the minute he showed up that he was and as the show has gone on people were like it can’t possibly be him that would be too obvious and yet the show gave you just that. The issue is people don’t seem to understand just how poor the writing actually is so of course they can’t misdirect you or give you a good twist it is far too hard for them.

Moreover, Mae, Amandla Stenberg, continues to be the most schizophrenic character in Star Wars history flipping between emotions every few seconds. In the flashbacks she cares about her sister, then she wants to kill her, she is on her mission to kill all the jedi, then suddenly gets bored and stops, she wants to escape and live with her sister then knocks her out and leaves her with a Sith who likes killing Jedis. This is not good writing, it is as though they cannot decide on how they want the character to be so they keep having her do different things that are entirely at odds with each other it is hard to follow. Moreover, the fact they had to strip the sister down so Mae could switch clothes with her feels like some odd pervy fan service, though there is no nudity you know that scene will feature heavily in deviant art for years to come.

Overall, though this episode is more interesting that last weeks I would say the baffling character decisions and the stupid writing makes it worse.

0.5/5

Pros.

The new Sith could be interesting

Cons.

Mae and her mood swings

The terrible writing

The reveal is obvious

You don’t care about any of the deaths

Girl boss X-23

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The Ballad Of Songbirds and Snakes: Rachel Zegler Before She Imploded Her Career

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A franchise that ran out of steam a decade ago is brought back because Hollywood is creatively bankrupt.

Why do we need to know more about the world of the Hunger Games it was a ripped off western Battle Royale with some added dystopian ideas. Honestly, I thought when they ended that franchise after its two part finale that it was dead, evidently not.

Where I think this film suffers when compared to the main saga is in the acting, on the one side you have a dude so bland and forgettable that you will find it hard to remember his face scene to scene let alone when the film ends. On the other hand you have the internet’s darling Rachel Zegler doing her best girl boss impression, by looking smug in every scene even when she is in danger. Clearly she was remembering how she alone is updating and bringing about world wide change with her new Snow White film and that is why she looks like that.

They name drop characters and ideas from the main series of films here, and you just feel like cool okay do you have anything else. Throwing a few oh remember this person or thing from the other films isn’t a substitute for good story telling or worldbuilding.

Overall, a pointless unneeded film.

2/5

Pros.

An interesting idea

It is relatively short

Cons.

The acting is awful

It is unnecessary

It uses cameos in place of world building

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I.S.S: For All The Insomniacs Out There.

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Life in space.

This was one of the recent films that just came and went, did you even know it existed before this review? Maybe you did maybe you didn’t.

For me catching this film on streaming I just think to myself that when Hollywood wonders why no one is going to the cinema anymore it is because of films like this. Boring, forgettable films that have similar premises to others that have come out in the not too distant past and which you remember more fondly than this.

Honestly even after watching this mere hours ago I can barely remember any of the main story points about it, that is how much it stays in the mind. It is just deeply forgettable.

In terms of the acting they have a pretty mixed bag of a cast mostly new people who have yet to cut their teeth or older TV guys still trying to become leading men in actually big films. They are fine if forgettable.

Overall, forgettable dross that will clog up the Netflix algorithm.

1.5/5

Pros.

It is a good sleep aid

It has some unintentional laughs

Cons

It is unoriginal

The cast do nothing

It is boring

It is too self-serious

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Predicting The End Of The Acolyte

Written by Luke Barnes

This will be something fairly new for this site, due to the popularity of my Acolyte coverage, I am going to try and predict the end of the show. Now for context we are about half way through at the end of next week’s episode so there is still plenty of places for this to go to. Maybe I’ll be right, maybe I’ll be wrong but here we go, and remember if you like this new format to let me know because then I’ll do more of it.

Okay so an easy one up first, someone from the wider Star Wars universe will cameo, likely right at the end of the final episode. If I had to guess I would say maybe someone like Yoda or possibly a Darth Plaguieis if they wanted to bring in someone from the wider lore, I don’t know if he is still considered cannon or not. They will do this to try and tie this fan fiction into the actual films and shows so that it feels more legitimate.

Secondly, Jodi Turner-Smith is the Sith that is training and sending out Mae, Amandla Stenberg, they will have some reason she survived the massacre, and say that it was her in ability to let her children be themselves that made her the villain. The two sisters will then join together to take her out, there will be the much rumoured I am your mother moment before this point. It will be odd if the show does this as it has had you sympathise with her character in episode 3 going oh she just doesn’t want her children taken away.

Thirdly, the Jedi order will be the real bad guys, even though the Sith are the known villains of the Star Wars franchise, this series will try to excuse Turner-Smith’s character who has weaponised her child into an assassin by saying oh but the Jedi are bad. This is being done to deconstruct the group and to tie into the tired analogy to modern policing and go oh they were too heavy handed they should have treated this community better, it is not subtle. The show will likely say that the Jedi were directly responsible for the massacre, or that they allowed it to happen through neglect.

Fourthly, the final shot of the series will be the twins starting their own force coven on some distant, but no doubt desert like world, where both the light and the dark side of the force will be explored. They may even tie into the Grey Jedi in some way, no doubt the show will have the twins and the good padawans who will rise up against the lazy and corrupt Jedi and lecture them on how they are terrible and dooming the universe, go off and found the Grey Jedi order. I don’t think that would work in terms of lore or cannon but hey the show doesn’t care, also they have erased a lot of the Old Republic stuff so it probably doesn’t matter.

Fifthly, there will be more identity politics, this one isn’t so much a prediction for a scene or story thread but more a comment on the show overall. There has been talk that their will be a conversation about a creatures pronouns in episode 4, and no doubt we will have more of the characters turning to the camera to explain that they are they them and that sort of thing. I wouldn’t be too surprised if we got a Jodie Whittaker who esque to the camera speech about all the hate in the galaxy and how close minded people are after such a scene, though they may hide their actual topic behind the clumsy metaphor of the misunderstood and persecuted space witches.

Finally, and this one is just for me, I predict that this show will not get a season two, it will very much go the way of Book Of Boba Fett and Kenobi and be one and done, the fan backlash and the division it has caused is enough to make Lucasfilm see this is not a viable path that a majority of fans are into

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Star Wars Is A Male Targeted Brand It Is Not Male Dominated

Written by Luke Barnes

In this cinema issues article we are talking about Star Wars, yes again, I know I am sorry. My inspiration to write this article came from quotes from Leslye Headland and Kathleen Kennedy about the Star Wars community and how it is toxic and male dominated.

I saw these comments and honestly I laughed, then I felt a little depressed. I think these comments from Kennedy a woman who arguably never ever got Star Wars and from Headland, a woman who keeps trying to convince you she is a Star Wars fan to appear down with the kids, whilst getting basic lore facts wrong, are infuriating. There is a trend amongst these shows that seem to want to take their properties and force in current era identity politics, I have talked about it with Doctor Who, and that is fan blaming. Basically, they make these shows that the fans don’t want and then rather than take any accountability for it they claim it’s the fans fault for not watching the trash they dole out to them.

One only needs to look at the stats for Star Wars to see it is a male franchise, whilst it is open to women, it is mainly men that watch these films and care about the brand. That is what makes the above comments so stupid and out of touch, not every franchise is equally for everyone, some lean more towards women and some towards men that is basic analytics. Yet, that doesn’t fly with what the creatives want, Kennedy has been trying to say Star Wars is a girl brand for years, Kennedy doesn’t understand her audience, you can see her with her force is female shirt for further reference. She doesn’t understand why the Mandalorian works, but the sequels didn’t.

Kennedy wants to push that this is a girl brand so she has a series like Obi-Wan where he is secondary in his own show to a new insert Inquisitor that no one cared about, it is obvious why this happened. The Acolyte with its heavy female cast is clearly trying to take aim at a female audience, and in doing that you have these attacking comments towards guys saying oh how bad the fandom is and how it is male dominated. This they are doing to pre-empt the backlash to the show, because they know it is bad, and they know fans won’t like it, so then the narrative becomes they are toxic. This show will not do well because unlike something like The Mandalorian that was for everyone,here you have a narrative that no this show is only for one type of fan and if you aren’t it don’t watch it.

It is shows like this which highlight why the Star Wars IP is in trouble

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Star Wars The Acolyte Opening Two Episodes: How Long Before They Start Blaming The Toxic Fans

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A live action Star Wars series based on the High Republic that no one wanted, I wonder how this will turn out?

Sometimes it keeps me awake at night what goes on at Lucasfilm, they have a massive era of the Star Wars universe that people really care about sitting right there and yet they do nothing with it. Why is that. In my mind the answer can only be that Disney wants to force people to like their Star Wars and even if they released films or series set when I am talking about it wouldn’t be theirs as they didn’t create it. I am of course talking about the Old Republic.

This series is set in the High Republic, an era that came into being under Disney and that they want you to like, bye bye Revan. Honestly, the setting alone is enough for me to loose interest, I just have no real reason to care about this era, and believe me from what I have seen so far they are not going to be doing anything to make anyone care.

So the idea of a secret Sith has some potential, however, in execution it all just falls apart. Amanda Stenberg cannot act, she behaves in much the same way many other girl boss characters have done in the past she has a pissed off look almost constantly plastered to her face and that’s it. She must have taken classes at the Alaqua Cox school of acting. At times I think to myself that Dafne Keen would have made a much better lead, as at least we know she can act.

The fact that the series tries to force us into believing that Carrie-Anne Moss is a still an action hero is frankly laughable. The fight scenes with her in the trailer looked incredibly fake and bad and I doubt you’d say they look much better in the show. That gets me to another point, the whole show from the sets to the makeup to the lightsabers all of it looks like it was done on the cheap. It looks very much like they didn’t have a budget and so just improvised, as I have said before it looks like a fan film not an actual production. I don’t know why this is, if they didn’t have faith in it and it got its budget slashed, if they wanted it to look bad for some reason, perhaps to own the trolls- the old She Hulk defence, or just because it was incompetently made. Could be a mix of all of them.

A final point and one that will no doubt get me some hate but it has to be pointed out, this series is very diverse as per the regulations over at Disney in order to try and get the most people in, but one key group seems to be missing out. There is a distinct lack of guys it feels a little strange that in this galaxy that is full of different races and species and what not that there is maybe only one or two here and there in minor roles. My question is again have Disney forgotten who the main audience for Star Wars is by all metrics and breakdowns, yes you guessed it young men. It seems like there is a desire to go out of their way with this one to have the cast be almost all female, that is fine if there was a reason for it, say a Nightsisters show, but this isn’t that this is supposed to be at the Jedi Temple. There are some guys around don’t get me wrong but it feels very heavily like Disney is pitching this show at women, and we get it Kathleen Kennedy thinks the force is female, but the viewing demographics aren’t. I guess my point here is that the show doesn’t actually feel very inclusive.

Overall, I think that unless it is a John and Dave venture I’ll be giving any future Star Wars project a miss.

1/5

Pros.

It had an interesting premise

Cons.

It isn’t inclusive

It doesn’t seem to know who it is for or what it wants to be

It doesn’t make you care about the characters, the setting, or the period

It looks cheap

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Kingdom Of The Planet Of The Apes: Have You Ever Heard Of Devolution, This Franchise Has

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Ceaser is dead but now we have a new Ceaser look alike to go through the same exact themes as the last trilogy.

To be fair the new Ceaser doesn’t start off liking humans whereas the old one did, the new one comes to like them by about the first hour of the film so its not a huge difference. I suppose a difference here is that the film is not really about the struggle between men and apes but rather ape on ape war.

However, I think the real issue here is that the stakes are incredibly low. Maximus is supposed to be this Roman esque conqueror yet his beachside community is pretty small, moreover, where he could have been a good antagonist for several films and been built up to be a true nemesis for new Ceaser, he is just offed at the end of the film. It is very underwhelming.

The reason for him being offed is to once again go back to the well of human vs ape conflict because why try and do anything new when you can just repeat the beats of the last trilogy. Honestly, I found the relationship between new Ceaser, and Mae, Freya Allen, to just be stupid. She has sought him out, for a reason implied but never shared, she says how much she needs him but then betrays him, I guess you could say she lied there but then why did the narrative push the bond so much, and then finally she plans to kill him, for once again no reason at all, she could have just left and never seen him again. Mae might as well not have been in the film as she contributed very little, had a baffling motivation and only really existed to be like oh the humans are going to try and fight back.

Overall, this film could have been something great but it lived too much in the past with its fixation on Ceaser and its desire for more ape human conflict, we could have seen Maximus grow and develop and form a civilisation that new Ceaser had to fight against but no some birds killed him.

2.5/5

Pros.

It is interesting to see how the Apes have evolved

It sets up some interesting things for future movies, not the ape vs human stuff

It is fairly well paced

Cons.

The lead character is just Ceaser all over again

The human character makes no sense

They waste Maximus

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