My Big Fat Greek Wedding Three: Once More Into Greece

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

For a series of contrived reasons we need another trip to Greece.

Again this is one of the most unnecessary sequels I have seen in a long time, who thought this was needed and so long after the fact as well. There is a part of me that believes this film was only made as a way to justify a holiday to Greece by one of the studio executives.

Again a lot of the charm from the first film and partially the second was lost here, yes there were still moments of what made the first one so easy to warm to but by and large it was just gone, hollow and empty.

Also whoever thought that the way to sell this third film no one wanted was by making it super topical and timely was again way off the mark. Whilst I agree with a lot of the things the film is saying about society and the European migrant crisis, I think that it is tonally inconsistent with the rest of the relatively lighter fare and isn’t mixed in in a way to makes it feel anything other than forced. Also I get that films are filmed usually a year or two before release but because of this some of the points they were trying to make about the migrant crisis feel a little outdated, again good sentiment but terrible implementation.

Overall, an incredibly unnecessary sequel.

2/5

Pros.

There is some fun

 The vistas look nice

Cons.

There is no need for this film

The timely messages are several years out of date

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The Book Club The Next Chapter: The Sequel No One Needed

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A group of old friends head to Italy for a bachelorette party.

I was in two minds about watching this film at all, the first was fairly abysmal and was nothing other than a cynical ploy to cash in on the Fifty Shades fad that was popular when the film was greenlit. However, I must say that this film faired better than the first and was watchable and even charming at times, now there were some pretty big issues with the film don’t get me wrong but it was at least more passable than the first film.

In a sense I applaud this film for trying to be a sex comedy film at times with older women. Within the landscape and our broader culture old women are far too often seen as sexless and grandmotherly ceasing to have needs of their own, so it was nice that this film tried to address that. Although it must be said that it does so with the grace of a wrecking ball, and rather than have a mature conversation about the sexuality of older women the film instead just crams as many groan inducing, in a bad way, sex jokes as it can into its runtime. It just feels a little juvenile, though it must be said it is handled with more class than something that Al Pacino or Robert De Niro would do wherein they would be doing gross physical comedy as well.

Something that hit me early on with the film and that opened things on a sour note was how much this film is a covid film. By that I mean that this film within the first few minutes must have mentioned covid at least twenty times, and again I feel like this is done as when the film was being made the pandemic was a big news item, however, now upon release it just serves to date the film.

Both of those issues exist alongside the various technical issues that plague this film such as convenient writing, a generic plot, pacing issues and over sentimentality, but you would expect those sort of issues with a film of this nature so I won’t spend time addressing each in turn, just trust me they are there.

Overall, hopefully this is a closed book now.

2/5

Pros

It is watchable

It opens a much needed conversation on the taboo of older female sexuality within media

Cons

It turns an important conversation into a series of sex jokes that are never funny

It is generic, dull and at times the pacing is trying

The reminder of the pandemic

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Love Again: Reading The Texts Of A Deadman

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A music journalist, played by Sam Heughan, finds himself in possession of a phone that is receiving texts from an unknown number, little does he know that he will end up falling in love with the mystery sender, played by Priyanka Chopra.

This film was strange, in many senses this misjudged a lot of things. Most noticeably was the tone, there are things in this film that are big deals like the male lead using the texts send to him unknowingly by the female lead, who thinks she is sending them to her dead ex, to track her down and pursue her, but rather than treat this as the red flag it is it is instead set up as a quirky meet-cute.

Moreover, Sam Heughan was entirely miscast with the film wanting more of a bumbling Hugh Grant sort but instead has a brooding and quite intense lead that doesn’t meet any of the boyish playfulness his role is clearly written to have. Additionally, the romantic chemistry between Chopra and Heughan is fairly non-existent.

Don’t even get me started on how much this film goes out of its way to plug Celine Deon, who no doubt Sony owns the rights to her music catalogue, it was off putting and made me feel like I was watching an advert rather than a film.

The film is passably watchable in a pinch and I did think the sequence in which Chopra’s real life husband Nick Jonas showed up was quite funny. Jonas shone in his little cameo role and it really was a shame he didn’t get more time or a bigger part as his character was far more interesting that Heughan’s.

Overall, Jonas is good for a laugh and it is passable if fairly generic and forgettable.

2/5

Pros.

It was passable

Jonas was funny in his brief cameo

Cons.

The leads have no chemistry

Heughan was miscast

It is generic

The tone is off

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Robots: Jack Whitehall The Rom-Com Leading Man

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

In a near future wherein people can have robotic doubles a pair of low lives use their doubles for depraved means only to have them then run off together and the low lives have to go and chase them down.

Whilst perhaps not the most original, I found there to be a lot of charm to this film. As it progressed I found myself caring more and more about the characters and the world itself.

The romantic pairing of Jack Whitehall and Shailene Woodley works surprisingly well and the two have great chemistry and by the end do feel like a believable couple. I never really viewed Whitehall as a rom-com leading man before but I have to say this film sold me on it.

I thought the comedy here was fairly hit or miss, there were a few jokes that hit hard and landed but also a lot of others that missed the mark. However the gaps in humour were more than made up for with the heart of the film which is big and quite effecting. By the end of the film I fully cared about the robots and wanted them to have a happy ending.

Overall, a sweet rom-com and a promising new career path for Whitehall.

4/5

Pros.

It is sweet

It is funny

Woodley and Whitehall have good chemistry

You care about the characters

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She Is Love: An Art House Rom-Com In All The Worst Ways

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A woman, played by Haley Bennett, traveling for business ends up staying at her ex-husband’s hotel.

So I will give this film props for trying to do something new with the standard rom-com formula, it does try and subvert some of the obvious cliches and that is to be applauded. However, instead of presenting tired and worn cliches the film instead encompasses a bunch of pretentious art house tosh that makes little to no sense and will leave you scratching your head.

The relationship held between the romantic leads, played by Bennett and Sam Riley, is deeply toxic, though I suppose that is sort of the point of the film. Yet you never really get to understand the ins and outs of it all as the conversations and wider narrative of the film seems to want to jump between things rapidly. The effect of this jumping around is disorientating and off putting.

Overall, though it tries to do something new this film falls headfirst into the well of pretentious art house nonsense.

1.5/5

Pros.

It is short

Bennett is trying.

Cons.

It makes little narrative sense

It is pretentious

The leads have no chemistry at all

It manages to have pacing issues despite being fairly short

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The Other Woman: This Is Why Cameron Diaz Needed To Retire

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A pair of women, played by Cameron Diaz and Leslie Maan, find out that they have been cheated on and so team up to try and take down their ex, played by Nikolaj Coster-Waldau.

When considering films like this you can see why Cameron Diaz retired. If her return in years to come leads to more films like this being made than the landscape as a whole will be a worse place for it.

There was nothing of any charm of warmth about this film. If anything there were lines so unpleasant and off putting that I almost turned it off. Take if you will a scene in which Diaz’s character is talking to her assistant, played by a robotic Nicki Minaj, wherein they talk about there being no issue with Diaz sleeping with married men so long as she can ‘take them’. Now, before you say it, yes this attitude has been in many male driven rom-coms before so isn’t anything new, and this is at the start of the film wherein the character still needs to work on themselves, however, whether it was a man or a woman saying this it is still a dick move. The whole conversation, which is fairly early on, doesn’t do anything to make you like Diaz’s character really quite the opposite.

Moreover, the film tries to cut a feminist silhouette of having the women realising they should be helping and uplifting each other rather than fighting over a man, which is a good message. Although it is quickly undercut as Diaz’s character just begins a new romance, which then makes the idea of her not needing a man to be happy, which the film really tries to run with, feeling hollow. I think the film would have been better if after defeating the ex Diaz’s character ended the film single but open to the idea of trusting a man again. That would feel more true to me at least.

Overall, this film wasn’t enjoyable to watch at all and at times felt like it was forcing my hand to the off button, and I like rom-coms.

0/5

Pros.

None

Con.

Diaz is unlikeable

It is contrived and overly familiar

It tires to land a feminist message but is way off course

The ending contrasts the whole point of the film

Nicki Minaj can’t act and shouldn’t be given any roles in the future.

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Rye Lane: Finding Love In Modern Britain

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Two recently dumped individuals, played by Vivian Oparah and David Jonsson, meet randomly one day and find that they have a connection.

This isn’t a new film, the idea has been done in hundreds of films before especially within British rom-coms. However what this film does is update some of the older tired cliches and to produce something modern to a reasonable effect.

I don’t think this film reinvents the form but it is a nice wholesome watch. Jonsson and Oparah have great chemistry and both are charming in different ways. The way their characters interact with each other on screen instantly makes you root for them and want them to be together, this is helped by the fact that for once the relationship shown to us in a rom-com doesn’t seem incredibly toxic.  

I also liked some of the more surreal shot choices and story telling frames this film used, it was a nice break from the genre but also from within the film itself it helped to shake things up and keep them fresh,

My highlight of the film was the Colin Firth cameo as the burrito chef, which I thought was hilarious and well placed. It was nice to see a genre mainstay like Firth show up for a film like this and give his blessing to a new generation, it rooted the film so easily within this very British tradition and created an unforgettable moment.

Overall, a nice happy watch but not one that will blow you away.

3.5/5

Pros.

The leads have good chemistry

It is fun

It makes you care about the characters

The Colin Firth cameo

Cons.

It is very familiar

The conflict towards the end of the film feels forced in rather than organic to the story

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What’s Love Got To Do With It?

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A documentary filmmaker, played by Lilly James, makes a film about her childhood friend’s, played by Shazad Latif, arranged marriage.

The romantic set-up in this film is incredibly obvious to the point where it crosses over into cliché, everyone knows going in that James’s character is going to fall for Latif’s that is part of the unspoken agreement of the film. However, what isn’t known is that this film is worlds away from other rom-coms such as Love Actually, Crazy Rich Asians, Boxing Day etc by the fact that it is not a comedy at all.

I would argue that this film is not a rom-com, more so a romantic drama film with a schmaltzy ending that tries to undo a lot of its more depressing aspects but doesn’t really come anywhere near close enough. This film is depressing at times manically so, and that really is its greatest fault. Whether it is Lilly James saying how all the Disney princesses were depressed, her incredibly toxic relationship with her mum, played by Emma Thompson, or the fact that the arranged marriage actually happens although you knowing the genre think it won’t, this film knows how to upset you. There were multiple moments in the film where I found myself wanting to leave as it was so depressing I was no longer having fun at the cinema.

I think the great bane of this film is that despite James and Latif giving reasonably serviceable performances this rom-com lacks any kind of warmth or charm at all and that makes the film off-putting.

Overall, this film does the one thing a rom-com never should do, be depressing.

1/5

Pros.

James and Latif try their best to save this film

Cons.

It is depressing

It is not by any means a fun watch

The ending feels like it is over compensating

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Maybe I Do: The Rom-Com Genre Is As Toxic As Ever

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Yet another toxic rom-com in which a group of once loved actors trade away their remaining industry respect for an easy pay check.

Honestly this film has one of the most toxic plot lines I have ever seen. Emma Robert’s character thinks she can pressure her boyfriend, played by Luke Bracey, into marrying her by saying if he won’t then they will break up. What makes this more troubling is that her character’s mum, played by Diana Keaton, thinks that this is a totally fine thing to do as well. For what it is worth it is not a normal thing to do, you shouldn’t pressure your partner into doing what you want before they are ready and marriage isn’t the be all and end all that this film seems to think it is but hey.

Really you shouldn’t expect very much from a film that has such clunky lines of dialogue as this is my heart and this is my brain, whilst holding the character’s significant other’s hand over these areas. To say it is cringe is both an understatement and well as giving this film too much credit, the writing is just so subpar that it becomes impossibly not to notice bad.

Overall, avoid this at all costs and Michael Jacobs should probably never write anything ever again and hope that one day he lives down the shame of this film.

1/5

Pros.

It is short

Cons.

It has a bad message

It has deeply unlikeable characters

The romance is troublesome

It is tedious and generic

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Your Place Or Mine: If Only This Could Be What Life Was Like, Charmed Doesn’t Begin To Cover It

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Debbie, played by Reese Witherspoon, and Peter, played by Ashton Kutcher, have been friends for multiple decades but are only just now realising that they want to be with each other romantically.

In many senses this is a safe choice, it is a bog standard rom-com, nothing more nothing less. If that is enough for you then great, but don’t go in expecting anything that is going to change the game or be in any way remotely new or fresh.

I thought both Witherspoon and Kutcher brought a level of charm and warmth to their respective roles, but at the same time you would expect that from two such genre pros. In regard to their romantic chemistry on-screen, there were some sparks there and at times I found myself believing it, but it never really came alive and struck me as authentic.

As it is a rom-com we have to ask the age old question of is it sexist? The answer to that is yes, however, it is not the most sexist rom-com I have ever seen. I am of course referring to the fact that Kutcher’s Peter is a fairly well put together chap, if a recovering addict and a bit lonely, whereas Witherspoon’s character is a stereotypical overly involved mum who lives through her kid, Lord knows they can’t break away from genre archetypes and try and give her a more nuanced role. No, no as she is a woman she is stuck in the obsessive mother role, in the end she is seen trying to branch out to new horizons and work in publishing, however, this is with the implication that Kutcher’s Peter helped her calm down and stop worrying so much about her kid. Yikes.

Overall, pretty much exactly what you would expect from a rom-com both for good and for bad.

2.5/5

Pros.

Witherspoon and Kutcher both give good performances and have a little chemistry

It is fairly well paced

It is very watchable

Cons.

It is sexist

It is fairly forgettable and generic

Some of the side characters are barely characters at all

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