Predicting The End Of The Acolyte

Written by Luke Barnes

This will be something fairly new for this site, due to the popularity of my Acolyte coverage, I am going to try and predict the end of the show. Now for context we are about half way through at the end of next week’s episode so there is still plenty of places for this to go to. Maybe I’ll be right, maybe I’ll be wrong but here we go, and remember if you like this new format to let me know because then I’ll do more of it.

Okay so an easy one up first, someone from the wider Star Wars universe will cameo, likely right at the end of the final episode. If I had to guess I would say maybe someone like Yoda or possibly a Darth Plaguieis if they wanted to bring in someone from the wider lore, I don’t know if he is still considered cannon or not. They will do this to try and tie this fan fiction into the actual films and shows so that it feels more legitimate.

Secondly, Jodi Turner-Smith is the Sith that is training and sending out Mae, Amandla Stenberg, they will have some reason she survived the massacre, and say that it was her in ability to let her children be themselves that made her the villain. The two sisters will then join together to take her out, there will be the much rumoured I am your mother moment before this point. It will be odd if the show does this as it has had you sympathise with her character in episode 3 going oh she just doesn’t want her children taken away.

Thirdly, the Jedi order will be the real bad guys, even though the Sith are the known villains of the Star Wars franchise, this series will try to excuse Turner-Smith’s character who has weaponised her child into an assassin by saying oh but the Jedi are bad. This is being done to deconstruct the group and to tie into the tired analogy to modern policing and go oh they were too heavy handed they should have treated this community better, it is not subtle. The show will likely say that the Jedi were directly responsible for the massacre, or that they allowed it to happen through neglect.

Fourthly, the final shot of the series will be the twins starting their own force coven on some distant, but no doubt desert like world, where both the light and the dark side of the force will be explored. They may even tie into the Grey Jedi in some way, no doubt the show will have the twins and the good padawans who will rise up against the lazy and corrupt Jedi and lecture them on how they are terrible and dooming the universe, go off and found the Grey Jedi order. I don’t think that would work in terms of lore or cannon but hey the show doesn’t care, also they have erased a lot of the Old Republic stuff so it probably doesn’t matter.

Fifthly, there will be more identity politics, this one isn’t so much a prediction for a scene or story thread but more a comment on the show overall. There has been talk that their will be a conversation about a creatures pronouns in episode 4, and no doubt we will have more of the characters turning to the camera to explain that they are they them and that sort of thing. I wouldn’t be too surprised if we got a Jodie Whittaker who esque to the camera speech about all the hate in the galaxy and how close minded people are after such a scene, though they may hide their actual topic behind the clumsy metaphor of the misunderstood and persecuted space witches.

Finally, and this one is just for me, I predict that this show will not get a season two, it will very much go the way of Book Of Boba Fett and Kenobi and be one and done, the fan backlash and the division it has caused is enough to make Lucasfilm see this is not a viable path that a majority of fans are into

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The Acolyte Episode 3 Review: Star Wars Is Dead And Kathy Did It

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

We learn that the twins have abusive parents that want to control them and indoctrinate them. Yet the episode kind of feels like it wants us to root for them.

Lets start off this review by saying two things, firstly the Jedi did nothing wrong the force witch coven are abusive and controlling and want the twins to have no control over their lives they only tried to help the kids. Secondly, this will be my last review of the Acolyte as I’m done, with this show. However, if enough people want me to carry on I may do so. Never say never.

This is the episode that had been prophesied to ruin Star Wars and it did, and for what. So Leslie Headland could live out her fan fiction fantasy about a group of strong lesbian witches that don’t need no man trying to take down the evil patriarchal Jedi order, with a female master. You can almost feel in this show the amount of destain that Headland, a supposed fan, has for the Jedi and for Star Wars in general.

Now how did she ruin it, oh boy buckle up. Well remember how Anakin was immaculately conceived by the force and that is why he was so powerful and supposedly the chosen one, well here we learn that the twins were also born of the force so that basically destroys the whole idea of Anakin being the chosen one. Now some people have argued its not the same Anakin was made by the force itself, whereas here the witches use some magic to create them, therefore it is their creation not that of the force, yet the show knows what it is doing it is trying to undermine Anakin and the wider Star Wars universe because it knows that that story is better than the tripe they are peddling here.

Moreover, we continue to have no masculine heroes, I went some ways to talk about it before in my 1 and 2 review, but all the males here are just so passive and in no way cool, they are emotionless and just do as their told by the strong female characters. I understand wanting to have strong female characters, for the tiny female viewership they care about more than the overwhelmingly male one for some reason, but they couldn’t even give the show one interesting male character that has some agency and isn’t just weak.

The acting continues to be terrible across the board, nothing more needs to be said there.

Overall, I am fully convinced Disney wants to kill Star Wars.

Pros.

It is meme worthy

Cons.

It ruins the lore

It is dumb and needless

It is Headland’s personal fanfiction

The acting is awful

The lack of any non-passive male leads

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Star Wars Is A Male Targeted Brand It Is Not Male Dominated

Written by Luke Barnes

In this cinema issues article we are talking about Star Wars, yes again, I know I am sorry. My inspiration to write this article came from quotes from Leslye Headland and Kathleen Kennedy about the Star Wars community and how it is toxic and male dominated.

I saw these comments and honestly I laughed, then I felt a little depressed. I think these comments from Kennedy a woman who arguably never ever got Star Wars and from Headland, a woman who keeps trying to convince you she is a Star Wars fan to appear down with the kids, whilst getting basic lore facts wrong, are infuriating. There is a trend amongst these shows that seem to want to take their properties and force in current era identity politics, I have talked about it with Doctor Who, and that is fan blaming. Basically, they make these shows that the fans don’t want and then rather than take any accountability for it they claim it’s the fans fault for not watching the trash they dole out to them.

One only needs to look at the stats for Star Wars to see it is a male franchise, whilst it is open to women, it is mainly men that watch these films and care about the brand. That is what makes the above comments so stupid and out of touch, not every franchise is equally for everyone, some lean more towards women and some towards men that is basic analytics. Yet, that doesn’t fly with what the creatives want, Kennedy has been trying to say Star Wars is a girl brand for years, Kennedy doesn’t understand her audience, you can see her with her force is female shirt for further reference. She doesn’t understand why the Mandalorian works, but the sequels didn’t.

Kennedy wants to push that this is a girl brand so she has a series like Obi-Wan where he is secondary in his own show to a new insert Inquisitor that no one cared about, it is obvious why this happened. The Acolyte with its heavy female cast is clearly trying to take aim at a female audience, and in doing that you have these attacking comments towards guys saying oh how bad the fandom is and how it is male dominated. This they are doing to pre-empt the backlash to the show, because they know it is bad, and they know fans won’t like it, so then the narrative becomes they are toxic. This show will not do well because unlike something like The Mandalorian that was for everyone,here you have a narrative that no this show is only for one type of fan and if you aren’t it don’t watch it.

It is shows like this which highlight why the Star Wars IP is in trouble

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Star Wars The Acolyte Opening Two Episodes: How Long Before They Start Blaming The Toxic Fans

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A live action Star Wars series based on the High Republic that no one wanted, I wonder how this will turn out?

Sometimes it keeps me awake at night what goes on at Lucasfilm, they have a massive era of the Star Wars universe that people really care about sitting right there and yet they do nothing with it. Why is that. In my mind the answer can only be that Disney wants to force people to like their Star Wars and even if they released films or series set when I am talking about it wouldn’t be theirs as they didn’t create it. I am of course talking about the Old Republic.

This series is set in the High Republic, an era that came into being under Disney and that they want you to like, bye bye Revan. Honestly, the setting alone is enough for me to loose interest, I just have no real reason to care about this era, and believe me from what I have seen so far they are not going to be doing anything to make anyone care.

So the idea of a secret Sith has some potential, however, in execution it all just falls apart. Amanda Stenberg cannot act, she behaves in much the same way many other girl boss characters have done in the past she has a pissed off look almost constantly plastered to her face and that’s it. She must have taken classes at the Alaqua Cox school of acting. At times I think to myself that Dafne Keen would have made a much better lead, as at least we know she can act.

The fact that the series tries to force us into believing that Carrie-Anne Moss is a still an action hero is frankly laughable. The fight scenes with her in the trailer looked incredibly fake and bad and I doubt you’d say they look much better in the show. That gets me to another point, the whole show from the sets to the makeup to the lightsabers all of it looks like it was done on the cheap. It looks very much like they didn’t have a budget and so just improvised, as I have said before it looks like a fan film not an actual production. I don’t know why this is, if they didn’t have faith in it and it got its budget slashed, if they wanted it to look bad for some reason, perhaps to own the trolls- the old She Hulk defence, or just because it was incompetently made. Could be a mix of all of them.

A final point and one that will no doubt get me some hate but it has to be pointed out, this series is very diverse as per the regulations over at Disney in order to try and get the most people in, but one key group seems to be missing out. There is a distinct lack of guys it feels a little strange that in this galaxy that is full of different races and species and what not that there is maybe only one or two here and there in minor roles. My question is again have Disney forgotten who the main audience for Star Wars is by all metrics and breakdowns, yes you guessed it young men. It seems like there is a desire to go out of their way with this one to have the cast be almost all female, that is fine if there was a reason for it, say a Nightsisters show, but this isn’t that this is supposed to be at the Jedi Temple. There are some guys around don’t get me wrong but it feels very heavily like Disney is pitching this show at women, and we get it Kathleen Kennedy thinks the force is female, but the viewing demographics aren’t. I guess my point here is that the show doesn’t actually feel very inclusive.

Overall, I think that unless it is a John and Dave venture I’ll be giving any future Star Wars project a miss.

1/5

Pros.

It had an interesting premise

Cons.

It isn’t inclusive

It doesn’t seem to know who it is for or what it wants to be

It doesn’t make you care about the characters, the setting, or the period

It looks cheap

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Tales Of The Empire: A Further Glimpse Into The Inquisitors

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Morgan Elsbeth and Barriss Offee, have their lives explored.

So for the most part I thought this was a really good anthology series. I liked that we got to see more of two groups that I am really interested in The Nightsisters and The Inquisitors, I think both are fascinating and would watch a solo show about either in a heartbeat.

I thought that Offee’s story was by far the better of the two, the majority of my complaints with the series come from the Morgan side of things but we will get there. It was interesting to see Offee go to the dark side, and see how easy it was for young Jedi’s to come to believe that the order was in fact evil and turn their backs on it. It was fairly predictable that she was going to go back to the light and she did, however, it led to her death and personally I would have liked to have seen her survive. Mainly because another Star Wars series I would like to watch is a The Path show that talks about the Jedi Underground and brings back some MIA Jedi’s such as Quinlan Vos and possible Kal Kestis and Merrin.

The Morgan Elsbeth episodes started out promising with a wider exploration of Dathomir but then got bogged down in Imperial intrigue and the vague set up of Thrawn. I understand why they choose her for the other half as she is important in the Ashoka show however I would have given them to someone else as I think watching her become mad with power felt a little boring.

Overall, more good than bad and some very welcome exploration.

3.5/5

Pros.

Offee’s journey

An exploration of the Inquisitors and The Nightsisters

It sets up a lot of interesting things

The animation is really well done

Cons.

The Morgan Elsbeth plotline gets bogged down

It has an iffy pace at times

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Fire Kathleen Kennedy

Written by Luke Barnes

This piece will talk about Star Wars and the clear differences between Star Wars from a John Favreau and Dave Filoni view and Star Wars under Kathleen Kennedy’s purview. Yes I am aware that she signs off on everything as studio head but I am referring to the Filloniverse as it is known vs everything else.

To get to the brass tax of it this article was inspired after catching up with the first few episodes of the new season of The Bad Batch and then reading an article online about the Acolyte. In both of these things two very different things are being done, on the one hand you have characters that fans have come to know over a long period of time and lots of appearance from well liked characters and on the other hand you have something very new without known characters. Now a few prefaces, I am not saying in John and Dave’s stuff there isn’t new characters there are, there are simply a lot of returning ones as well, and I am not saying outside of the John and Dave stuff there is no recurring characters in the rest of the shows there are, just these feel more forced, I am also not saying there shouldn’t be entirely original stories.

I personally think of these two approaches the one favoured by John and Dave is the right way forward as it expands Star Wars and gives us new characters but does so in a way that feels like they care about the characters they already have and care that fans like them. Whereas outside of John and Dave Kathleen and co seem to want to wipe away everything the fans care about killing off fan favourite characters and wanting to move to entirely new periods in cannon, not to tell interesting new tales but so they aren’t shackled by cannon and so they can stuff the cast with as much diversity as possible. There is a sense that John and Dave understand that Star Wars is for everyone and have strong male and female characters, look at Dinn and Bo-Katan, whereas Kathleen wants only women to watch and so pushes Rey over all the other characters in the sequel trilogy, makes Reva the main focus of the Obi-Wan show and cast the Acolyte tobasically be all women. It couldn’t be clearer to see that Kathleen and her ilk and Lucasfilm hate the male fans who make up the majority of the Star Wars fan base and most likely thinks of them as some unwashed bigots who they can try and take money from whilst calling them names. However, it is clear to see that this isn’t working. The Acolyte is already hated, Obi-Wan didn’t make the numbers in the way they wanted it to and the sequels…. Well there is a reason we haven’t had a numbered film in a goodly while.

Whereas again in the John and Dave sphere The Mandalorian has been Disney plus’s flagship show, The Bad Batch has a dedicated fan base and Ahsoka often trended on X, people want their shows whilst looking at things like the Acolyte and just seeing more of the same messaging and fan hate that ruined the sequel trilogy. Who knows maybe the Acolyte will become another Andor a breakout hit despite who is producing it but somehow I doubt it and I think it will be another round of blaming the racist fans, even though the majority aren’t, for not mindlessly consuming a bad product they didn’t ask for. It is funny how it is never that the product was bad anymore it is always oh the toxic fans.

Ultimately I think Star Wars needs to see the back of Kathleen Kennedy her politics is ruining many a good idea and I think someone who is actually a fan, I don’t believe she has ever watched any of these films of TV shows, should be in charge.

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Star Wars: The Quest To Lose Half The Audience To Get A Quarter

Written by Luke Barnes

This piece will talk about Star Wars and the continued mismanagement of the once beloved franchise. As a lot of you will know I have written a cinema issues piece before about Star Wars and Kathleen Kennedy, but here I want to talk more about the upcoming Acolyte show and how the metrics show that what certain sections of Lucasfilm are trying to do won’t work.

So before we get into it a few disclaimers, firstly I think the shows and soon to be movies under John and Dave’s watchful eye have been mostly good bar Book of Bobba Fett¸ secondly the Acolyte may well be good I could be wrong about it. With that said let’s get into it.

Men and women alike for many decades have both liked Star Wars, however, in terms of traditional gender norms it was always seen as more of a boy brand, rightly or wrongly, than a girl brand. Personally, I think people can like what they like regardless of gender, but this was how the franchise was perceived. Anyway in recent years Disney has tried to make the brand into a girl brand with the idea that the male audience would stick around and they could grow the audience even more, and maybe in a sense they could have done this. However, rather than create new stories that had male and female strong characters in it that could encourage both sides of the audience to stick around new projects like the Acolyte don’t value or want the male audience around, so only focus on creating female characters with the idea that male fans have had it too good for too long. No doubt they will cry that this isn’t for male fans or call them ists and phobes as they often do, again because Lucasfilm wants to keep the male audience around, sarcasm.

Moreover, look at something like Madame Web that thought it could take its male audience for granted and went full force into the idea of tokenistic cynical female empowerment and then got closer to having women being fifty percent of the audience but at the same time lost a massive chunk of their male audience and bombed. If I ran Star Wars that would bother me, and I would know as the research suggests that most of my audience was male so I would question will this show work for them.

I am not saying that men can’t relate to female characters of course they can look at the popularity of Buffy but when you create a show that seems to be from the off, with how the creatives have spoken about it, being fairly antagonistic to a large part of your viewing audience, you can’t really be surprised when this does flop or underperform or just doesn’t get picked up for a second season.

What I want is for common sense to return, for the pendulum to swing back to the middle. You can make a show that is for everyone, that doesn’t have creatives that hate their audience and tells them this show isn’t for them, you can have a show that appeals to men and women, you don’t need to prioritise the female audience over the male audience you can do both. Why does it have to be one way or the other at the moment. You know why something like Dune did really well because it appealed to men and women, the director didn’t do an Instagram post in a car looking like he hasn’t shaved in a few too many years and tell fans that the film isn’t for them it is just for a small section of vocal activists on X who probably don’t even care about the IP.

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Ahsoka: Season Overview

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Rebels gets a meaningful wrap up.

Whilst Kathleen Kennedy lives out her days proving South Park right and thinks that forcing another chapter in the much hated sequel trilogy is the right way to go with a director who wants to make a large part of the audience ‘uncomfortable’, Dave Filoni proves that he is the one sane voice left in Star Wars.

I will admit this isn’t a perfect series, the pacing is really all over the place and it takes far too long to get good but once it does it really does. I think it is nice to see the Rebels family back together again and I think seeing Ezra, Eman Esfandi, is still carrying on with the force in his self-imposed exile is a nice parallel to Luke, Mark Hamill, who wanted the Jedi to die.

I think that Rosario Dawson did an okay job as Ahsoka, I am still not sold, but her scenes with Anakin, played by Hayden Christensen, where interesting and compelling especially if you have watched a lot of the previous animated material. However, I thought the best characters here by a country mile are Mary Elizabeth Winstead as Hera and Natasha Liu Bordizzo as Sabine. Winstead plays Hera with the right amounts of maternal feeling but also military prowess that both aspects of the character are realised well, I think the scene in the finale where she gets to meet Ezra again is particularly touching. Bordizzo’s Sabine on the other hand really is the anchor of the series, I think she is a great audience surrogate character and you really buy her quest to save Ezra, I also thought that turning her into a Mandalorian jedi, padawan for now, was a nice touch. I would be interested to see if the show keeps Sabine and Ezra as just friends, I have a feeling there may be another force baby on the way in the coming seasons.

The villains are strong, Thrawn, Lars Mikkelsen, is probably the least strong of the bunch maybe it was just because I didn’t get to see much of him but I thought that he just didn’t have the same menace he did in the shows. Elsbeth, Diana Lee Inosanto, was cool it is night to see more from the Nightsisters hopefully we get to see more of them in the next season. Baylan, played by Rey Stevenson, and Shin, played by Ivanna Sakhno, were both very interesting, I found Baylan’s quest to be very interesting and it is a shame we didn’t get a more definitive answer as to what he was looking for in the final episode. I would like to see flashbacks to his time in the order in the next season, they could do that to get around the tragic real world passing of Stevenson. Shin has a lot of potential to rise to be a Sith Lord in the post original trilogy pre sequel trilogy era, though I think they will have her turn to the light instead.

The plot is mainly just a quest to find Ezra and then to find Thrawn which really isn’t very much, hence the need to pad it out, but I think the season ends off on an interesting note.

Overall, there is still some hope left out there in the Star Wars universe

4/5

Pros.

Hera, Sabine

Seeing the characters reunited

Where the season ends off

More Nightsisters

Cons.

Pacing
Bad costumes/effects at times

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Star Wars Is Dead

Written by Luke Barnes

This piece will talk about Star Wars and the recent controversy around the comments made by the director of the next cinematic release.

Now for those of you who have followed me for a while you will know where I am going with this, why alienate your audience. Kathleen Kennedy seems to think that the force is female but if you actually want to be profitable, and be able to make streaming services that aren’t haemorrhaging viewers season by season it might be time to admit that the force is genderless and stop telling the male audience to take a long walk off a short pier.

Again Kennedy in her wisdom, and likely some kind of voodoo hold over Bob Iger, has hired a documentary filmmaker for the director of the next film. Now I have no issue with the director’s work on Ms Marvel she did make the best episodes, however, I think that you need professionals not activists. I have often said studios should have it in their contracts that anyone working on any of their projects cannot make divisive political statements whilst they are under contract it just makes sense. Anyway, the new director in an interview said that she likes her film’s to make men uncomfortable, again this is not the kind of attitude you want from a director of a blockbuster.

I won’t even engage with this from a culture war outlook, but rather from a business one the Star Wars brand is on life support and the last thing you want to be doing is saying something like this that will fracture and divide your fanbase even further and create bad PR for the film before it has even come out. Yes, there are people who would hate this anyway as it carries on the sequel trilogy, but why go out of your way to make it worse.

Again Kathleen Kennedy needs to realise that her rather glaring political positions are getting in the way of her making a good film, if you say the force is female and tell the male audience to take a hike, and take it further by making a film that is seemingly now designed to make them uncomfortable then it won’t do well at the box office and will bomb because lets face facts women aren’t turning out for Star Wars, any analytics you want to look at will still tell you men are the main audience.

If I was Bob Iger right now I would be livid, I would remove Kennedy as she cannot be trusted anymore, I don’t know how after the last Indiana Jones film that killed that franchise and the Sequel trilogy she is still in a job but hey. If nothing else if for some reason they can’t get rid of her I would veto her directing choice take the bad PR and then bring in a Brice Dallas Howard someone who knows the brand well the fans like and is still female so they can still tick that progressive box.

Lets face it folks Rey, a hated character, led Star Wars film that carries on the bad blood of the sequels and is directed by someone who wants to make the majority of the audience uncomfortable is destined to bomb as it has no fan excitement, it has no hype and it will go the way of Aquaman II after the whole Amber Heard thing.

Widely this is a step to kill Star Wars as Kennedy knows her days are numbered in the top job.

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Star Wars Visions: The Bandits Of Golak

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A brother and sister duo try to escape Imperials and Inquisitors whilst fleeing the Galactic Civil War.

There isn’t a whole lot wrong with this episode, it has some okay action and at times knows how to use its tension, but I think that is just it, this is an episode of half measures it is fine but doesn’t push for more than that.

I think the major issue with this episode is that the plot idea has been done before and done better, not the exact same plot but the idea of force sensitives having to run away from the Empire whilst being hunted down and having to make sacrifices to go into hiding. I feel like I have seen the episode so many times before in different areas of Star Wars media and for me that is a problem.

I also think that it is time to stop having all these survivors of Order 66 as it totally ruins the moment within the lore. Order 66 was impactful as it killed off most of the Jedis, it was a big deal, to have more and more of them surviving just takes away from it. Before you say it I know this show isn’t cannon, but I just wanted to say as it plays a role in the narrative of the episode that it is a plot crutch I am not enjoying from current year Star Wars. If they want to have more Jedi they could establish that there was a temple of some kind in the Outer Rim or beyond that was a splinter group from the main order and which didn’t get involved in the Galactic Civil War for whatever reason. That way you can have more new Jedi’s pop up without the question being where were they in the original trilogy.

Overall, a fine episode if one that felt very, very familiar.

2/5

Pros.

The action was okay

It was watchable

Cons.

The lazy plot crutch of another surviving Jedi

I feel like I have seen it before

The emotions weren’t developed enough to be impactful

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